Rest in peace Woo - you will never be forgotten

Tonight was the night I had to let my gorgeous baby woo go.......to say I'm heartbroken is an understatement. I feel like a huge hole has been cut from my heart and im feeling so alone and unable to cope......Ive never felt loss and pain like this. I feel like im going to burst I just cant take it, Woo was without doubt my most treasured companion in life, she was my little bundle of joy no matter the times in my life.
I just cant find the words to describe my despair..................as i sit and write this tears fall down onto the keys and i cant help but think did i do it too soon. Woo had a cancer that came on very quick and was untreable, she had lost so much weight and was barely eating but still every morning she would find the strength to come sit on my lap while i did my make up n greet n when i returned from work. The vet kept elling me it was the right thing to do and that it was a kindness which i understand, and i didnt want her to suffer. However the whole process for me was so disstressing. They popped cream on her leg so it wouldnt hurt yet when they were putting the needle in she was hissing and growling,,,,,,,,then the final moments were so horrendous i nearly couldn't take it, I had imagined a peaceful going and it seemed so harsh............the look in her eyes were of saddness and seemed frighten, I couldnt keep it together. The she was gone......i just cant even begin to discribe the feeling of seeing her lifeless and without those big eyes looking back at me.
I just want to reverse it and have her here with me now.,,.........I cabt get the final moments out of my head and wonder where she is now and if she is ok....I kniw that sounds daft. How will i move past this......will i ever? I keep looking round the house for her,,,,,,,,,I just cant accept it.


I wanted to write about her and all the things i loved and how she changed my life but I cant bring myself to, the memories are to painful to think of...................................................i am so very sad

I'm so sorry.  Especially about the euthanasia not going as you'd hoped.  I've been there and I know that pain/confusion.  Only time helped me with that.  She was a very beautiful kitty, by the way.

I'm so very sorry that this was such a bad experience for you and Woo.  It should have been a peaceful going, as you expected, if it was done with preoperative sedation.  The vet gives your cat one quick shot in the butt and then leaves you for a little bit while she slowly goes to sleep in your arms, purring,  and they don't have to try to hit a vein until she is totally under and doesn't feel a thing. I'm also sorry that you didn't let us know ahead of time because we could have told you what to ask of your vet  by sharing information from an in-home euthanasia team that uses this humane method. he fact that all vets don't do this is obviously a flaw in vet education.  Perhaps you can make a difference for others in the future by sharing this link with your vet when yo are ready, since obviously no one has shown him an easier, softer way.   http://www.sweetdreamsgeorgia.com/expectations.php

I am truly sorry for your loss. Woo was a beautiful, cuddly looking little cat. I am sorry the last moments didn't go well. It should not have been that way. I have held two cats through that procedure and it was so smooth. They both went to sleep in my arms. If you ever find yourself in that position again, do some research and talk with your vet beforehand about how he does what he does. For now, I can only say, cry because it helps. In time your memories will be sweet and bring you peace and comfort, but for now it will hurt. It just takes time. We are all here for you.

Thank you all so much for your replies, this morning was just awful..........I long for her so much and cant help but relive those awful moments through my head again and again. I feel i will be very lost for a long time x

We all hope that our loved ones will die peacefully in their sleep, and this would happen in a perfect world. But we don't have a perfect world and this seldom happens. I'm so very sorry you had to go through this, but you were with her during that time, and even though it broke your heart, it meant the world to her. You saved her from a future of pain and suffering, it was the loving thing to do even though it tore you apart. It's normal to have second thoughts and lots of guilt, but it's a part of grieving that we all must go through. Because  we loved so deeply we feel immense pain for our loss. It leaves a huge hole in our hearts that will take a long time to heal. Let yourself grieve, the first step in healing is to gather a support system of caring people who understand and can help get you through this horrible time in your life. We will try to share your agony and lessen the burden on your soul. We do understand that the pain can be so intense at times it can take your breathe away, and time is all you have to help you get through. You'll have times when it eases a bit, and then will come crashing back like a tidal wave. Remember your baby is waiting for you at the Rainbow Bridge, safe and warm and whole again. Let the love that you two shared reside in your heart, keeping her spirit alive forever, and some future day you will be able to cherish her memory with smiles instead of tears. Bless you for loving so much, RIP beautiful Woo, the world lost a precious baby, the heavens gained a beautiful soul! 

I"m so sorry! It's so hard to lose a fur baby! It's horrible that it went so wrong, and surprising, as others have said euthanasia is usually peaceful. That's why they say "put to sleep". Where did the vet learn the procedure? I definitely think you should share information with her. Woo was beautiful, and she knows how much you love her.

I'm so, so sorry. What a beautiful little girl Woo is. Heaven is a lucky place to have her

Beautiful Woo