My 20 year old passed.. Feeling guilt

Hi there. My cat smokie died on feb 1st I've had her since I was five. I was not home when she passed as I was out of the city but she was not alone she was with my family. I feel huge guilt for not being there, I never got to say goodbye. Not sure what happened apparently she was convulsing. I miss her terribly. Has anyone else had guilt of not being there when their baby passed?

I'm very sorry for your loss, and that you weren't able to be there during her last minutes. Twenty years is a long life for a cat, and your family was there with her, so she was accompanied by people who loved her. A feeling of guilt usually seems to be part of grief, even though you know things were beyond your control.

RIP, Smokie.

It's very normal to feel guilt by not being there, but you had no idea that this was going to happen while you were away. Please try to remember the love you two shared for 20 years and try not to dwell on her passing. You can tell her goodbye now, I'm sure she will know you are trying to communicate. I truly believe that they stay around us for a while if we cannot peacefully accept their passing, ask her for a sign. It may be as subtle as finding a strand of her hair or as dramatic as my Chrissy's message which was a sideways shooting star. But I can almost guarantee she'll answer you. My heart breaks for what you are going through, but she died at home where she was most comfortable, surrounded by people that loved her, I'm happy for that. I'll keep you both in my prayers, bless you for hurting so bad because you loved so much. RIP beautiful Smokie!

I am so sorry for your loss. You couldn't have known this was going to happen, and she was not alone when the time came. As the above posters have said - you had many wonderful years of loving her, and I'm sure she remembered that when the time came. Cherish those moments! Thinking of you at this difficult time. <3

You gave her a loving home for 20 years and you have nothing to feel guilty about.  Having said that I think it is normal to feel guilty when a beloved pet passes and we're not with them.  That's why many vets encourage people to be with their pet when they pass.  She had a long life and was loved and well cared for, may she rest in peace.

I'm so sorry for you loss. I have felt guilt of not comforting my cat enough when she passed I try not to think about the moment she died but just good times i had with her. She was truly my best friend she put in 15 yrs of making me smile, laugh, and making me happy.

I'm so sorry for your loss. Rest in peace sweet Smokie. 

I'm sorry about your kitty, but I'm prud for the fact she lived such a long time and in a loving home.

Beautiful Smokie

Thanks so much everyone. I got tears in my eyes reading the posts. I have had dreams about her and she always looks healthy in them. And the other day I woke up out of a deep sleep and swear I saw her sleeping beside me but as I looked closer it was just blankets. Wishful thinking or a true sign from her. Either way, I'm happy to see her in some form