Gus's lymphoma seems to be progressing very quickly. We were supposed to start chemo on Friday but I chickened out, what's worse, letting him slip away or putting him through the chemo? I cannot stop thinking about him for a second. His breathing is getting worse and the tumor must be resting against an ear canal because he keeps his right ear down and keeps shaking and scratching his head. He is keeping up a good front though and wants to be active, he still wakes us up, wants outside and would love to play if it didn't make him choke. How do I give up on such a strong little soul? My husband said "he wants us to help him so let's do it" but now we have to wait until next Friday as the clinic only does chemo Fridays. If it ends up being too late,I will never forgive myself. The cost for 1 year of chemo and related treatments is about $7000, this is in addition to the $2000 I've already spent just to get a diagnosis. I don't want this to be about money but boy it's tough, I am looking for a part time job to help pay for some of it which means I probably won't be home at all with that and my full time job. I have certainly learned the hard way about finding a good pet insurance.
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10/18/03 at 9:09pm