The cat must go

wanderlust

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I'm really sad because after 6 months of trying to integrate a cat I rescued , and now consider my pet, with my resident cat I have had to make the tough decision that the two can not coexist.
I'm so torn up about it and have been crying a lot. I just can't see any other option-- I've tried all the steps to introduce cats and all that's come of it are cat fights, fur flying and sleepless night.
This truly sucks!
Anyone else have a rescue story go unsuccessfully?
 

ritz

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Yes, and initially Ritz wasn't too bothered by Twiddledee, so I thought it might work. I'd been feeding Tdee at my colony for almost a year, moved 1/2 hour away but still fed him on the weekends. (A co-taker feed him Tuesday & Thursdays.) He suddenly developed a limp, it was cold, I was concerned he couldn't run fast enough to hunt, so I took him to my house to recuperate and possibly adopt out. (The limp turned out to be arthritis.)
But as Tdee explored more and more and got more and more comfortable among me and the house, Ritz started to provoked Tdee without cause. Tdee was a very calm cat, and paid Ritz no attention until about the third or fourth swat. A couple had seen Tdee in the colony months ago and had expressed interest in adopting him when they relocated to the area. But they wanted to see him in the colony setting. Although puzzled at the request, and increasingly bothered by Ritz' escalating anger towards Tdee, I made the heart-wretching decision to return him to the colony for possible adoption.
I contacted the couple, arranged to meet them at the location of the colony, they didn't show, I called them, they hung up on me.
I still see Tdee every weekend (and his presumed litter mate, Twiddledum). He still comes over for petting. I still worry about him.
But my priority is always to my resident cat. Ritz was here first, and even with her litter mates (rescued themselves, at four months of age, from the streets) she was aloof, a loner. Some personalities just cannot mesh.
I should add Tdee never stopped wanting to go outside. Indeed, one day he did escape, but found his way back to my front door 12 hours later. (Right before Super Storm Sandy hit.) So ideally he'd made a good indoor/outdoor cat but my area is not safe enough for that (and it's against the HOA rules).
Have you tried to adopt him out? I and I'm sure others will have some ideas, suggestions, if you think that's a possibility.
 

di and bob

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I. too, had a LOT of problems, but believe it or not it took over a YEAR for mine to get along, so don't give up! Good luck!
 

catwoman707

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Oh yes, and it took literally years for them to get where they are now, tolerate each other, but there's still, and after 7 years will surely always be some occasional

attempt to take over the other one's top cat spot.

2 dominant minded females, strong personalities, Krissy was my only cat, from the day she was born, and totally the baby.

At 4 years old I brought home Simone, who I rescued as a homeless cat. She is about the same age as Krissy is too.

I kept Simone at my store for over a month before integrating them at home, but at that time I felt she was bonding to me and needed more time other than my store hours only.

It was crystal clear from day 1 that Simone was very unhappy that there was an already established topcat there, and it was on........constantly the attitudes were flying, Simone was accustomed to street surviving, and was a pretty bad mammajamma, strong and muscular, while Krissy was like a powderpuff.

But Krissy never backed down, stood her ground, at first I treated them equal, but soon saw that my Krissy was getting that defeated feeling, so I had to help things along a bit, small things, putting Krissy's food dish down first, having her sleep at my side rather than allowing Simone to take that spot, so I was putting her towards my feet, and so on.

This went on and on and on, endlessly. But I felt no choice in the matter, it had to work out eventually right?....well it has.

It was a long haul but they know theyre places now, I am able to treat them equally now but still Simone will test Krissy, just in case she gets a chance to take over Krissy's spot and I will remind her by subtly putting Krissy at the top again.

They still take turns messing with one another now and then, one week it will be Krissy waiting around a corner to pounce Simone, then before I know it is Simone doing it.

But it really WILL happen, if my 2 girls could work it out, I believe anyone's kids will too. It does take time though, that's for sure!!
 

ondine

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We have a cat who hates all our other cats and has never integrated.  She has her own room!

If that isn't possible in your case, you will have to find another home for her.  It is hard work but not impossible.  Contact your local rescues, use the Internet, tell your friends.

And thank you for helping her. 
 
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betsygee

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We have two cats who share a room separately from the other household cats.  I haven't quite given up hope as we've had them several months now and everybody seem to be calming down.  We are going to give integration another try before we give up the idea entirely.  But if it doesn't work, they will live in separate quarters.  But the option of keeping them permanently separated may not be open to you.

So sorry you are going through this.
 

andrya

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I'm really sad because after 6 months of trying to integrate a cat I rescued , and now consider my pet, with my resident cat I have had to make the tough decision that the two can not coexist.
I'm so torn up about it and have been crying a lot. I just can't see any other option-- I've tried all the steps to introduce cats and all that's come of it are cat fights, fur flying and sleepless night.
This truly sucks!
Anyone else have a rescue story go unsuccessfully?
Maybe if you gave us their details, we could help you out as much as we can. We'll all had experience with integration, some more difficult and lengthy than others. We'd be happy to help 


What are their genders, ages, who was there first? Are they both neutered? Have you tried ignoring the newcomer and openly babying the top-cat? (l still have to do this on occasion to "appease" Tanner, my boys have a strong hierarchy).
 
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wanderlust

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Ok, the details:

Dot is my resident cat. She is spayed and 7 years of age. She's a real anxious scaredy cat type. I rescued her as a kitten who had been hit by a car. As a result she had her tail amputated and is not a strong (or maybe comfortable is a better word) jumper. She's little and chubby and is the type that hides under the bed when company comes. When I travel and leave her with my parents and their 3 cats, she keeps to herself. She's been an only cat her whole life and I her only companion.

Daisy is the rescue cat. When I got her spayed the vet determined she is 3-5 y.o. She is larger and has great agility. She is incredibly social and playful. When people come over she loves to be in the mix and will show out with all her toy skills and acrobatics.

Basically they are total opposites.

I live in a split level loft. As of now, Dot has the run of the upstairs and won't leave her safe zone.

Daisy has the run of downstairs and is obsessed with being upstairs with me, if I happen to be up there.

I keep the two areas separated with baby gates and an extra tall pet gate.

One day I went to yoga and when I came back Daisy had slipped through all the barriers and was upstairs under the bed with Dot, for who knows how long. I saw all this fur under the bed after I removed Daisy.

They can have limited and supervised exposure (under 20 minutes) upstairs in Dot's safe zone, but any longer and the two are fighting for domination of the window ledge or bed.

Dot likes to run from Daisy and that eggs Daisy on to give chase.

I don't want Daisy to be a bully. I don't want Dot to get bullied.

That's the gist of it.

Thoughts appreciated.
 
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