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Voodoo Barbie Is In The House

post #1 of 19
Thread Starter 
Just wanted you guys to know that me and my cats escaped the little hellhole on the prairie on Saturday, October 4th. My ex-friend started yelling and screaming that she was sick and tired of me living there (mind you, the gas service was still cut off, and the lights were next). Her son had to hold her back, and I had to barricade the door. She called the police and they explained that since it was her house and she wanted me to leave, I had to go (oh, boo hoo.) One of her complaints against me was that every day at 5 o'clock in the morning I would get up and make noise. The cop looked at me and I explained that I was the only one in the house with a job.
He looked at her like she was crazy.

It's a good thing I had most of my stuff already boxed up. I put my big tv on the floor in the back room, covered it with a sheet, and piled boxes around it. I managed to move most of my stuff in that back room. I also called the police since this idiot was still raving and they stood around while I moved the cats, and my clothes out. My brother came and picked me up and we've been over at my mother's house. It's been a little rough, because neither my mother or my brother like cats, and they have tried to convince me to get rid of them (yeah, right!) I had my stuff put into storage. We're moving into that cute two bedroom apartment later this month.

I had a few anxious days because it was the weekend and I expected those b*****ds to steal my belongings. I was VERY lucky, because when we came back the following Wednesday all my things were still there. Mind you, we were supposed to move Monday (Saturday night I'd left a message on her answering machine). She disappeared all day Monday. I came back Monday night with a police escort. Those two cops were my witnesses as I made her commit to a time (11AM) and a date (the following Wednesday). When I came back (again with the cops) two days later all my stuff was still there. I think she realized that the money I was paying the moving company would have gone to her, and she called her sister to come pick her up. Now, if I was such a horrible tenant, don't you think she would have hung around to see that I didn't steal any of her stuff, or wreck her house?

On my way out I left a voodoo doll I made of her hanging in the closet. Sounds silly, but it made me feel good. I also know that she believes in and is afraid of that kind of thing. Hope she enjoys it.
post #2 of 19
Have you thought about calling the Jerry Springer show? They may be very interested in this.
post #3 of 19
Thread Starter 
This would be tailor made for Jerry Springer! Only problem is, I'd be too embarrassed to show up for the taping. And if I did show up, when she came at me for the mandatory catfight on stage, I'd pull out a gun and drop her right there. Would you take care of my cats if that happened?
post #4 of 19
Sure.
post #5 of 19
I've been waiting for an update from you! You crack me up with your gleeful posts regarding the old landlady/exfriend. The voodoo doll

Glad to hear you're "outathere!!", and all your cats and belongings still safely with you. Good luck with your new place.

Jerry Springer
post #6 of 19
post #7 of 19
VooDoo Barbie...Dropping someone with a gun.... I dunno'--this sounds more like something for America's Most Wanted...
post #8 of 19
LOL Kim guess it's a toss up America's Most Wanted or Jerry Springer? Or maybe an episode of Cops?
post #9 of 19
Uh Oh! Remind me never to mess with you!

Your story is great- Glad you're safe and sound!

post #10 of 19
Love the voodoo doll thing. I should do that when I totally mowve out. My landlady is a FREAK!!!!
post #11 of 19
I'm happy to hear that it ended without you losing any of your things.

Maybe you could appear in Cops, America's Most Wanted and Jerry Springer? It's be great ratings, producers would love it...just think, you could probably sell your voodoo dolls.
post #12 of 19
Glad you got out of there!
post #13 of 19
Thread Starter 
Hi, everybody!!!

Thanks for your kind thoughts! I've always said that I'd be featured on "America's Most Wanted" sooner or later. You know: "Woman slaughters noisy neighbors..." or "Man beats cat with broom; Neighbor woman gives man enema with broom"... I can hear John Walsh now: "We've gotta get this psycho off the streets!" The Saturday I moved out I saw so many law enforcement officers I refused to watch "Cops" later on that night...

I got my voodoo doll from ebay--she was part of a lot of barbie dolls I won. I got the idea one night as I was packing my things in boxes---I had a blinding tension headache and I kept having revenge fantasies. I sat down with a black magic marker, some white glue, a bag of doll hair, and some acrylic paint, and when I finished she had symbols painted all over her and black headed pins stuck just about everywhere! My headache was GONE! It looked just like my ex-fiend.
I know this woman is afraid of stuff like that. She is one vindictive old bat--she will call state, federal and municipal agencies and make false complaints on folks who have made her angry. What is it that Richard Pryor, the comedian, used to say? "If people think you're crazy, they'll leave you alone."

I want this ***** to leave me alone.

Of course, my father's side of the family does come from Louisiana, and I could always call up some of my people and get the scoop on how to do that stuff for real...
post #14 of 19
SHEESH! I'm glad you're out of there. She sounds like a real Wicked witch of the west!
post #15 of 19
Thread Starter 
You're not half as glad as I am! I swear, after I settled the cats down in my mother's basement, I could have sworn I heard one of them yell out, "Thank God that's over" and I thought I heard champagne corks popping!
post #16 of 19
Quote:
Originally posted by rubyangel
You're not half as glad as I am! I swear, after I settled the cats down in my mother's basement, I could have sworn I heard one of them yell out, "Thank God that's over" and I thought I heard champagne corks popping!
.... Or maybe the pull back tops on some prime cuts of canned kitty food?
post #17 of 19
Glad you and the kitties are in a happier/healthier place!
post #18 of 19
Thread Starter 
I think the theme song for the day is Nancy Wilson's song, "How Glad I Am"!

You know, that sound could have been the tabs on canned cat food. When I went downstairs to check on them several hours later I discovered that Rocky found the bag with the food and decided to help himself!
post #19 of 19
Quote:
Originally posted by rubyangel
You know, that sound could have been the tabs on canned cat food. When I went downstairs to check on them several hours later I discovered that Rocky found the bag with the food and decided to help himself!
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