Kitten Only Likes To Be Around Me When Sleeping Or Wanting Food

crossbones3129

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I'm just saddened by the way my kitten acts towards me. He plays around and when I try to pet him to show I love him he constantly tries to bite my fingers, even when he's laying down he does that. When he's hungry he runs up to me crying and rubbing against my leg but other than that he tries to attack my feet. He cries if I pick him up for a while. I wanted a kitten that would love to be around me but it doesn't seem like he likes too.
 

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How is this biting of fingers looking? Hard, even drawing blood, and or threating, OR playing, perhaps even love bites? - even if these love bites may be too hard to be comfortable.

Most cats get more friendly and cuddle loving when they get older.

Ie, quite a few kittens arent really liking to cuddle. Their owners must be happy they are sweet to look on and looking at their merry play.  Being a little older and no longer playing as much, they accept easier to be cuddled - typically when they are laying down somewhere, perhaps on a sofa. Or coming to their owner and sleeps with them.  It comes with time.

So, really, adopting an adult is not seldom the best, more people should do it!

Be sure it is visible whom comes with the food, cleans litter, gives fresh water.

Good luck!
 
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crossbones3129

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How is this biting of fingers looking? Hard, even drawing blood, and or threating, OR playing, perhaps even love bites? - even if these love bites may be too hard to be comfortable.

Most cats get more friendly and cuddle loving when they get older.

Ie, quite a few kittens arent really liking to cuddle. Their owners must be happy they are sweet to look on and looking at their merry play.  Being a little older and no longer playing as much, they accept easier to be cuddled - typically when they are laying down somewhere, perhaps on a sofa. Or coming to their owner and sleeps with them.  It comes with time.

So, really, adopting an adult is not seldom the best, more people should do it!

Be sure it is visible whom comes with the food, cleans litter, gives fresh water.

Good luck!
He doesn't draw blood but when I'm sitting at the computer he's constantly biting and scratching my feet and it's to the point where it's like if someone poked me with a toothpick. It's very bothersome. I pick him up blown in his face and hit at him and have been doing that for the past 2 weeks but he keeps doing it. It just makes me think the blowing and hissing and aggressively grabbing him and picking him up is scaring him away from me. I don't think it's love bites because he's do flips and rolls trying to bite my feet, hands, and fingers.
 

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I have had a lot of emails to the rescue over the years from concerned pet parents who have kittens that do almost exactly what you are describing. It is very common when someone has a single kitten growing up alone, so not sure if that is your kitties situation or not and if it is it will just take some extra work. It sounds like he is definitely trying to play, and he may be a very snuggly kitty inside but his energy and overstimulation is getting in the way. Does he have a friend that is his age to play with? If not I would definitely start having a designated play time every day for at least fifteen or twenty minutes ( the more the better) where you play with him. Use a kitty chaser or a laser and make this time ALL about playing with a toy and draining his energy, never playing with your hands or feet or any body parts. You can also help get his energy out when you are gone by buying interesting toys that encourage him to play alone ( cat trees, balls in tracks, toys that will move and encourage him to swat and jump at them, etc) to keep him Interested. rotate toys so they seem more exciting and new when they are introduced and re-introduced.
Also, never ever use your hands to play with him, rub him on his belly to get him going, etc. He is using your hands as toys and as you know you want to discourage that. He's not trying to be mean, but ts natural for kittens to engage in a LOT of rough play and test their boundaries and he is doing it with you. Pet him calmly and if he rolls over to kick you or bite, immediately say no ( not yelling but try to use a lower voice that he can easily begin to associate as something different) give him a toy to redirect him and if he plays with the toy reward him. If he is on your lap place him on the floor and toss a toy for him. you want him to first see that you WANT him to play with toys and this is good and gets treats. In his mind he should make the connection after time that playing with a toy equals much more fun and treats than playing with a hand. When you see him on his own playing and being a good boy give him a treat and tell him he's good, just keep encouraging him.
if this does not work after much consistency i have also had luck with another method. Preferably this would come after the first method has been used so he at least knows playing with toys mean really good things at this point. For the second method when the kitten bites or starts playing with a body part you say no the same as in the first method but then you place the kitten away from you and ignore him/her and walk away. Some people will blow on the kitten too but i havent had the greatest luck with that. You want him to learn that when he does bite a hand or play with a hand roughly he will get a firm no and then no attention- the opposite of what he wants.
I am a strong believer that positive reinforcement is much much better with cats so naturally I like the first method better but I do know a lot of people who have had success with both and I have done both but after trying the first method first with a couple of difficult kittens.
With either of the above reward and positive reinforcement is extremely important. When he is being a good boy and playing with his toys as he should be or be is calmly letting you pet him give him treats and tell him what a very good boy he is. You may even start to pick up on when he starts to get overstimulated when you are petting him and his mind set starts to change from calm to play after time so that you can react even quicker and grab a toy for him.
The absulute most important part to any of this working though is getting his energy out in a healthy way. Either with another kitten friend if that is an option or by playing every day- its very important while he is a kitten especially. Don't get discouraged I have seen many kittens to from manic play with humans to calm and some very snuggly- many times their energy just gets in the way if they don't have a natural play buddy.
 
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laurasorphans

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And personally I would never hit at him or blow since you're right, he can very well begin to make the negative association with YOU instead of biting since you are doing it. Keep us updated and the things above do take time
 
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crossbones3129

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And personally I would never hit at him or blow since you're right, he can very well begin to make the negative association with YOU instead of biting since you are doing it. Keep us updated and the things above do take time
I sure will follow your advice. I'll refrain from hitting, blowing, or picking him up aggresively. He's laying right by feet right now and I can kiss him and he never bites me hard but he does put his little paws up to block my lips lol. He is alone though, he plays a lot with different things in my house. I just hope he gets more loving than a maniac soon lol.'

Another thing is that when he's sleeping and I rub him a little bit, he sometimes let's out these little meows. I'm guessing it's to say he's really comfortable, kind of like how we sigh. I'm not sure but I was just curious that didn't mean he was mad. He sleeps, eats, plays for 20-40 mins with stuff around my room, then goes back to sleep and repeats the process.
 
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StefanZ

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I see these bites are typically "I wanna play" after your further explanations.  Kittens alone with their mom do also so, to their moms despair and anger. Mom pawing them now and then...

Observe also, if a cat wants to bite for real, it will draw blood, even a kitten.  So whatever he is doing, he  is NOT biting for  real!

The easiest remedy is to have two cats who are pals. Or as LaurasOrphans so told, play much with that alone kitten.

Good luck!
 
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crossbones3129

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I sure will follow your advice. I'll refrain from hitting, blowing, or picking him up aggresively. He's laying right by feet right now and I can kiss him and he never bites me hard but he does put his little paws up to block my lips lol. He is alone though, he plays a lot with different things in my house. I just hope he gets more loving than a maniac soon lol.'

Another thing is that when he's sleeping and I rub him a little bit, he sometimes let's out these little meows. I'm guessing it's to say he's really comfortable, kind of like how we sigh. I'm not sure but I was just curious that didn't mean he was mad. He sleeps, eats, plays for 20-40 mins with stuff around my room, then goes back to sleep and repeats the process.
I see these bites are typically "I wanna play" after your further explanations.  Kittens alone with their mom do also so, to their moms despair and anger. Mom pawing them now and then...

Observe also, if a cat wants to bite for real, it will draw blood, even a kitten.  So whatever he is doing, he  is NOT biting for  real!

The easiest remedy is to have two cats who are pals. Or as LaurasOrphans so told, play much with that alone kitten.

Good luck!
It's not like he wants to play though, I can't pet him for one second without him biting my hands. Today when I came home from work it's worse, he puffs up like he's about to attack me, like he's really mad and angry. I don't get how he can do all this but when it's feeding time follow me around crying and rubbing all over my legs or when just sleep by my feet with his head on one of my feet or lay next to my arm. It's weird.
 

laurasorphans

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IMO he is playing still unless he is hissing, growling, drawing blood, etc. Watch some videos of kittens playing rough with each other and you may notice he is exhibiting the behaviors they are except with you playing the part of the other cat. Have you started trying to drain energy by playing every day and offering treats and encouragement when he does let you pet him. Get a really yummy treat and when he is being good and letting you pet him give him some and just sit with him and offer him treats as he remains calm. You can sit on the couch with some treats and call him over and just have him wait by you for the treats while you pet him. Keep petting him as he is eating the treats and talking to him and make him wait and be a good boy and then give him another treat. So he learns pets= really yummy treats.

He needs to start letting loose though and learning to play with a kitty chaser WITH you so he can learn that that is an appropriate way to play with his human, or else he will just be "bad" out of total confusion and kitten energy.

If you don't think you have time to play with him daily, I would strongly strongly recommend getting another kitten his age as these things can turn into bigger issues if left unresolved. Some kitties will simply calm down once they grow out of the "kitten" stage but others will not and its almost impossible to know until you either have a calm adult or an adult that still bites yet much harder with bigger teeth and nails. I know that a LOT of people think two kittens is harder, but IMO it is much easier because they keep each other company and wear each other out so that they are not always biting and trying to play with you. They will play rough with eachother and then usually have for snuggles for their humans since they are calmer and not so stuffed with unused energy. Of course vet care and food expenses are more so for some people it isn't an option. 

Be sure to do no more swatting or blowing as I honestly think that that kind of fueled him more. Some actions will end up provoking cats more and like I said, kitten rough play is a big part of growing up so in his mind he may have been thinking it was just a big game all along.
 

laurasorphans

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Watch this video- now these guys are smaller so their actions may look less deliberate and "scary" but notice their tails and them "puffing up" at each other. They are not hurting each other though or drawing blood, this is simply typical kitten rough play and what I am thinking your kitten is doing.
 
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crossbones3129

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IMO he is playing still unless he is hissing, growling, drawing blood, etc. Watch some videos of kittens playing rough with each other and you may notice he is exhibiting the behaviors they are except with you playing the part of the other cat. Have you started trying to drain energy by playing every day and offering treats and encouragement when he does let you pet him. Get a really yummy treat and when he is being good and letting you pet him give him some and just sit with him and offer him treats as he remains calm. You can sit on the couch with some treats and call him over and just have him wait by you for the treats while you pet him. Keep petting him as he is eating the treats and talking to him and make him wait and be a good boy and then give him another treat. So he learns pets= really yummy treats.

He needs to start letting loose though and learning to play with a kitty chaser WITH you so he can learn that that is an appropriate way to play with his human, or else he will just be "bad" out of total confusion and kitten energy.

If you don't think you have time to play with him daily, I would strongly strongly recommend getting another kitten his age as these things can turn into bigger issues if left unresolved. Some kitties will simply calm down once they grow out of the "kitten" stage but others will not and its almost impossible to know until you either have a calm adult or an adult that still bites yet much harder with bigger teeth and nails. I know that a LOT of people think two kittens is harder, but IMO it is much easier because they keep each other company and wear each other out so that they are not always biting and trying to play with you. They will play rough with eachother and then usually have for snuggles for their humans since they are calmer and not so stuffed with unused energy. Of course vet care and food expenses are more so for some people it isn't an option. 

Be sure to do no more swatting or blowing as I honestly think that that kind of fueled him more. Some actions will end up provoking cats more and like I said, kitten rough play is a big part of growing up so in his mind he may have been thinking it was just a big game all along.
Thanks for the help. When he does sleep, he'll let me rub him and kiss him all I want and he enjoys it. I'm just scared he's gonna grow up hating me. I guess i could get another kitten but I've never had an inside pet and this is my first go around!
 

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Kitties simply don't have the ability to "hate," but I do know what you mean. Just remember to think simple and try to remember that the trick is positive reinforcement when he is good instead of negative reinforcement when he is bad. That way there is NO way that a negative association can be made with you, and instead you are a very good thing that is a supplier of treats and love. 

I have a perfect example of something similar to what you are experiencing and how it was resolved. I figured I'd share incase it helps.

I had a single preemie kitten ("Chandler") who had been alone from the time he was a premature orphan to the time he was 6 weeks old. I handled him for hours on end each day but obviously his was a more severe case than your kitten because he had no mother to teach him AND no siblings growing up to learn from during crutial developmental periods. Around 5 weeks he started biting HARD, but it was playing. He was also a foot chaser and was constantly wrapped around my feet or chasing them and biting my toes. He simply did NOT understand that there was anything wrong with it. All he knew was he had energy and this extreme urge to play and the most natural thing for him to play with that was the most "kitten-like" in comparison was my feet moving around or my hands as I was petting him.

I began increasing his kitty chaser play time and since he was a baby I always had used a stuffed animal to play with him instead of my hands as I anticipated he would have some play/biting issues. Anyway, with the increased play and the immense rewards he would get when he was being calm or playing with a toy like a good boy, his biting and playing with feet decreased immensely. Still, he did not completely "GET" it and still would sometimes bite, etc in a playing manner always.

Finally when he was six weeks old I got in a litter of 8 week olds and after I had made sure everyone was healthy I put them all together. Within days Chandler had learned SO much- he almost never bit or went after my feet in a matter of days and the other kittens had both drained his energy and taught him limits. He had a deposit on him but his new owner was so happy to see the progress he made, and he now does not bite at all or ever go after feet. I actually just saw him yesterday to do his second shot and he is one of the most calm and absolutely snuggly and loving kittens I've ever met- he purred through his shots and she could not be more happy with him.

It's just a good example for you of what I've been describing and how play and rewards can help but another kitten IS usually an easier fix. But either way, as long as you are committed to having a good relationship with him and willing to put in the effort, you should have no problems.
 
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crossbones3129

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He's still being very bad. I've been trying but he keeps repeatedly doing what I don't want him to. Today he was eating a piece of food and I went to grab it and he would bite my finger and growl like he was really mad!
 
 

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He sure sounds like a normal kitten to me.  They like to play and rough house and bite and bat at things. Kittens don't learn things like dogs or children, they kinda do what they want.   As he grows up and you get him fixed will mellow out.  I would worry if he didn't want to play and rough house.  Get him some toys and play with him til he is tuckered out!  Good luck! :)
 

laurasorphans

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You just really need to tucker him out. When kittens have a playmate they will rough house with each other so you will see more of the cuddly and calmer side but that is because they are wearing each other out.

You can still set boundaries as I mentioned above in detail, and as long as you are consistent he should get it, but kittens are always getting into something and even with a playmate he is going to do things you don't want him to. 

I've had kitties in the past that were simply out of control and when I added another kitten it made things much better, but as I'm typing this my Chloe who is now going on two is racing around the house playing with the giant dog bone (the noisiest toy in the house considering we have hard wood floors). Believe me this is much better than when she was a kitten though! I remember she used to climb in all of my cupboards and one night I was reaching to get a glass out of the very top cupboard while I was half asleep and when I opened it she was in there and she scared me to death 


The difference between having one and two kitties (that get along that is) is if you have two the energy and play isn't so much directed at you and naturally they will help each other expend there energy, but still kittens will be kittens and they will get into things we don't want them to, etc. They're kind of like big ferrets. I've had a couple of extremely chill kittens that are close to perfect but they came very few and far between.

Definitely start playing with him with a kitty chaser for as long as you possibly can- night time is a good time because they usually get riled up and then when you go to bed hopefully the energy won't be there as much.

One question though- Does he snuggle with you ever? When he IS worn out does he enjoy being pet?
 

laurasorphans

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Sorry for the delay been really busy with bottle babies. It seems like its just too much energy so doing things I went through above should help after time or adding a kitten. If you can't get another kitten and playing extra isnt helping after a few weeks to a month or so then hopefully he will grow out of the kitten phase and have less energy as he gets older. A lot of kittens are just more energetic and high strung than others so if they are single they have a hard time not trying to rough play with their humans. It's good that he is snuggly once he's warm out that's good and hopefully as he gets older he will become more snuggly with less energy. He isnt biting to be mean he simply wants to play so when he does that encourage him to play with you with a kitty chaser or something appropriate so you aren't encouraging the behavior.
 

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Both our kittens would get defensive of their food if we tried to get it from them. I'm not a pro but could it be because they have to fight for their share when they are little? Both of ours are almost a year old and never become mean or defensive of food or treats anymore, it was just when they were small.

Also, one of them used to be the biggest cuddle bug but now hates being held and cuddled most of the time. I have others that didn't like being held as kittens but are lap cats now. I think they all go through changes and if you take it personally it will drive you crazy.

My sister used to actually hold grudges at some of the cats because they didn't interact with her on her terms and it made her miserable. I bet your little one loves you and is playing with you like a cat which can be rough. Just keep up the advice you got here, it might take some time but it'll be worth it! Good luck with the your little one :)
 

laurasorphans

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And also about the food- I wouldn't worry that sounds pretty normal and a lot of kittens will do that and then grow out of it. They will protect food from each other but sometimes if a human puts there hand near their food while they are eating its kind of automatic for them. He should grow out of that on his own as he learns that food is always going to be around and you aren't trying to take it.
Just be patient it sounds like he is just going through a normal high energy kitten phase which is completely normal : )
 
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