Relating to Lauren's thread about being prompt, late, or on time......

[Winchester]

I have invited you to dinner at our house. Dinner is at 6:30, but you're welcome to show up at any time.

What time would you come? Early? Late? Fashionably late? On time?

The reason I'm asking is because people were talking about this on another board and I wondered. Most people said that they would show up right on time because, if they were cooking, they wouldn't want guests coming early and offering to help. They were extremely offended by that gesture.

Me? I'd come early, about 10-15 minutes or so and offer to see if there was anything I could do. Putting ice in glasses, filling glasses, helping with last-minute prep work, all kind of stuff. And if we were having dinner with good friends and family, I'd show up even earlier (but then with permission) to help, too.

So if you say you'd come early, that's more than fine with me. As long as you realize that I'd probably put you to work! 

Seriously when we have dinners here, most people do come early. And they hang out in the kitchen, mixing drinks or helping out. And I like it that way. I don't want to be in the kitchen by myself when everybody is in the living room or outside having all the fun. Some of the best times I've had are when people are hanging out with me in the kitchen. It doesn't bother me.

What do you think?

 

[kookycats]

I am always notoriously early for everything -- sometimes "too early". But I think it's better than being late. I'd love to come to your house, watch you work your magic in the kitchen and offer whatever help I could give.

 

[MoochNNoodles]

Me knowing me (

) I would aim to be there 10-15 early so that if I got held up I wouldn't be late.  Or thats what I used to do...

I guess it might depend on my relationship with the person who invited me for dinner.  If I don't know them well I'd make a major effort to be on time or just a couple minutes early.  If my kids are invited too and it's an unfamiliar place I'd aim for on time because they are small and active and would easily get underfoot.  If it's someone we all know well and no kids I'd aim for early.  What I usually do when I have plans for a playdate with friends is set a time and try my best to get there on time; but text or call if I'm going to be a few minutes late.  Who knew buckling 2 kids into these contraptions known as car seats takes so much time!?  You know; after the 3 year old gets herself back in the back where you put her but she didn't stay....  

 

[catsallaround]

If I knew you pretty well I would show up 30 miutes early if I been to your house a few times I would show up 10-15 minutes early. If I had NEVER been to house I would show up on time or few minutes early.  Either way I would ask what needs to be done "as I am early and would rather do something rather then just sit there".
 

I never have gatherings.  I do not feel comfortable as the house is for the cats and I have health issues that limit my energy.  My mom and sister are welcome ANY TIME.  Everyone else I would rather stick to an actual time. 

 

[yayi]

I have invited you to dinner at our house. Dinner is at 6:30, but you're welcome to show up at any time.

What time would you come? Early? Late? Fashionably late? On time?

I would come on time and if I am going to be late I would call. I am the type of person who will not offer my help in the kitchen because for one, I would not know where all the stuff is kept and two, I'll probably be on someone's way anyway. 

 

[jennyr]

This is a very cultural thing that varies amazingly in different countries. In the UK I found that it is usually considered to be correct to arrive 10-15 minutes late unless you have prior permission to arrive early or know the person so well that you are allowed in their house at any time. If it is a formal dinner you should arrive exactly on time.
In France it is correct to arrive up to 30 minutes late, and NEVER arrive early. It would be considered an insult to offer to help. WHen I lived in Bosnia it was often the case that dinner guests arrived up to 2 hours late! But usually cooking did not begin until they arrived and everyone chipped in to help. This meant that dinners often went on till early morning hours but no-one seemed to mind. Again though, if it is formal, then arrive on time with flowers.

Which is an interesting question in its own right - what is considered suitable for a hostess gift in different places? In Bosnia it was always flowers, nothing else, especially as most people do not drink alcohol. Here in France it is usually wine, with or without some flowers as well.

 

[swampwitch]

"Dinner is at 6:30" is a little confusing since to me that means everyone will be sitting down to eat at 6:30. Usually, there is some transition time before dinner that allows for everyone to arrive, and also have drinks and maybe appetizers. I'm used to something like "starts at 6:00 with dinner at 6:30."

Anyway to answer your question, since you stated "show up any time" I would arrive at 6:15 or so. To me it would be awkward to go straight from the front door to the dining room table.

Hello, I've brought a bottle of wine, I know you are a great cook and I can't wait to see what we're having!

 

[denice]

I am usually early.  I try to be on time but I always give myself plenty of time to get anywhere in case something happens so I end up being early.  Flowers were considered an appropriate gift to take to someone's home in Germany.  I remember there were a lot of roadside stands that sold flowers when I lived in Germany.  Any flowers but roses, roses particularly red roses were reserved for romantic love relationships.  I don't think there is a traditional gift here in the U.S.  It depends of the people's taste who are the hosts.

 

[natalie_ca]

I'd come a bit early too. Not hours early, but within 1/2 hour.  To me "dinner at 6:30" means sitting down to eat then.  I think it's nice to socialize a bit.

However, if the evening started at 6:30 and dinner was to be served later, then I'd arrive for 6:30 or as close to it as I could.  But I wouldn't show up late.
 

 

[feralvr]

I always come early. If dinner was "at" 6:30, then I would arrive a half hour early to help out and visit before dinner! I agree that hanging out in the kitchen and chatting is so much fun, and I appreciate the company anyway. :bigwink:

p.s. Pam, if I ever make it to dinner, you have to promise to make your famous Snickerdoodles.

 

[dejolane]

I love to be on time or at least 15 minutes early. Better early than late I say.

 

[AbbysMom]

I would be early or on time. :nod: