Are you a negative person or do you have a lot of negative people in your life?

One of my New Year's resolutions is to try to be less negative. It's tough though because my mother is one of the most negative people in the world and that is how I was brought up. As one of my brothers always says, if you are feeling really good about something, just give her a call and she will bring you down.

As I said, that's how I was brought up and I've been trying to fight all the negativity that comes into my head. Once you open your eyes to it, it's hard to believe how much negativity there is in this world. I am noticing my mother's negativity even more and called her out on it yesterday. That went well. I am getting sick and tired of the people that only post on Facebook to rant. Sure, I post an occasional rant, but I do try to post fun stuff too.
I think the internet makes it worse as you can anonymously be nasty and post negative comments. Have any of you ever read the comments on a newspaper article online, for example?

So I really don't know where I am going with all this. :lol3: It's another odd, rambling post from me. :lol3:

I guess basically are you a negative or a positive person and if negative, are you trying to change that?

I try very hard to be positive. I believe there is a lot of power in words and I try to pay attention to what comes out of my mouth. For instance, I don't like to hear people say, "I am trying to catch a cold.". l I want to say to them, then quit trying to catch one. Also it really starts with our thoughts. If we allow those negative thoughts, then they will come out of our mouth. So I try to start at the source and think good things.

It depends on what it is.  I do try to always be optimistic though. You know, glass 1/2 full, and I always try to keep the perspective of "it could be worse" etc.

But when it comes to my success, I tend to have self doubt and start second guessing things. For example, job interviews. I leave feeling like the interview went well, but as time goes on, I tend to think that I should have answered some questions differently.

I am a fairly negative person, I have to always THINK before I speak because if I don't I say something cutting. I would love to be more optimistic and loving, why is it so hard! People wouldn't think I am this way (most of them anyway!) because I really try. Is there a secret to being optimistic? I think a lot of it started when I went through menopause, along with hot flashes and irritability it's hard to be upbeat when you feel like you are on fire!

Di and Bob said:

 it's hard to be upbeat when you feel like you are on fire!

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LOL Isn't that the truth!

I try to think positive all the time. 

dejolane

I'm quite the opposite of negative.

I think I am more optimistic; but I've certainly had to practice to be this way.  I've had to consciously choose to not dwell on things and think about other, more positive things.  My family on my Dad's side; especially my Gram and her sister's in their younger days, they thrived on ranting and raving.  I can still picture my Gram working in her kitchen while on this old yellow corded telephone carrying on with one of her sister's about "so and so" and the particular name she had for these people that I will not repeat.  Gram was a pint size pistol in her younger days.  Probably why she's still running the way she is at 94 with Alzheimer's.  My Dad got it (don't even start on politics with him unless you want to really get into it) my 2nd cousin got it from BOTH sides.  She's a good facebook ranter.  Others too; but they are the worst.  If you work me up enough I'll go off on you; but I'm nicer about it than they are!  Trust me!    

I can't really be around people like that all the time.  I don't live near my family but even old friends who were super negative or dwelt on issues I've had to step back from.  I guess after I had my kids I changed.  Half the time it seems like they are all riled up over something trivial and they don't really want to fix it, they want sympathy.  I don't have time for that nonsense.

My Mother is a very negative person.  Also racist and makes no bones about how she feels in the family environment. She puts up a good front out in public. My daughter  is a lesbian and has been in a committed relationship for 7 years. My DD and DIL have a 3 year-old son and expecting another baby. While I know my mother loves them all, she refers to other gay and lesbian couples as "those people"! I distance myself from negative people as it brings me down and why would you want to feel that way. We all just need to get along and accept each other for our differances and our similarities. Stepping down from my soap box now. Love, like, or at least get along!

I'm rather negative and ever the pessimist I cant help it, Ive been done wrong so many times its made me that way!

AbbysMom said:

 I am noticing my mother's negativity even more and called her out on it yesterday. That went well.

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... Not sure why, but that did crack me up.  My mum passed away many years ago, but I don't think I would have risked going there!

I really do try to work on the positive. 

The philosophy of my lifestyle has been very useful as it's just so easy to fall into negativity...  As you say, AbbysMom, it's almost the nature of our society these days. 

So positivity sometimes really takes some doing!

I'm more positive than negative

I've removed negative people from Facebook, and if their not removed l only subscribe to only important updates from them.

I severed a friendship because of her negativity because l could feel myself being dragged down everytime she rang.

Life's too short, and lf you dwell on the past your the only one that's letting it happen, and remember this....You can't get that time back again!

Yeah, I can see how it would be easy to be negative - see the worst, expect the worst. Gets easier as time goes on, too. I guess I was really fortunate to grow up in a family that, for the most part, had a positive approach to things. I remember vividly one incident. I was probably five - maybe six. My parents went on vacation, and my grandparents flew in to take care of us while they were gone. We all drove them to the airport to see my parents off, and my grandfather got lost on the drive home. As we passed by the same exit to the airport for the third time, I started crying. I became nearly hysterical, and hollered "We're lost! We're never going to find our way home!" My grandmother turned around, held my hand, and looked me in the eye. She said, "Sweetheart, we're not lost. We're just temporarily misplaced." And I stopped crying, and knew everything was going to be OK.

Whenever anyone of us ranted about something around the dinner table, the response by one or the other of my parents was invariably, "Well, what is there that you can DO about it?" Write to the newspaper or columnist, contact a State or Local representative, talk to a person or teacher....

So within that context I ... decided? realized? ... a long time ago that I'm responsible for my happiness.

The way I see it - doesn't matter if the glass is half full or half empty, I try to be happy there IS a glass. :lol3: I find plenty of things to rant about, but I .... try to let my sun shine so bright it doesn't penetrate, and when I can take action about something that's bothering me, I do. When I can't, I try to let it go.

:sun:

:eyebrows: do I express myself?


...:lol3:

My grandson got bullied when starting the 10th last September now he is home schooled through ECOT. When I found out about this we all sat him down and talked about the bullying.I gave him positive encouragement the best I could. He is doing great at home and is getting great grades.

I too was bullied by a girl in the 10th . She thought I was trying to take her boyfriend and she pulled my hair. I quit school that year and got married. Never went back.

dejolane

Rosiemac said:

I've removed negative people from Facebook, and if their not removed l only subscribe to only important updates from them.

I severed a friendship because of her negativity because l could feel myself being dragged down everytime she rang.

Life's too short, and lf you dwell on the past your the only one that's letting it happen, and remember this....You can't get that time back again!

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You are right, Susan. When the phone rings and your heart stops because you just don't want to deal with it, then it's time to let it go.

OTOH, one of my best friends is the cheeriest person around. She'll call me and when I know it's her, I just have to smile because I know it's going to be a good chat. The other night we were laughing. Rick came back to the bedroom and asked, "Are you talking to Barb?" When I nodded my head, he said, "I knew it....just from the way you were carrying on! You know, they can hear you......on Pluto!"  (It's a standing joke at work that one can hear us laughing from one end of the building to the other. She blames it on me, but I know better. And when we go out to dinner, we turn into that couple that nobody likes because we laugh so much my belly hurts at the end of the night. We can't help it; it just happens. I truly love that woman.)

I think I'm fairly positive overall. For the most part, I try to look on the bright side of things.  

Winchester said:

You are right, Susan. When the phone rings and your heart stops because you just don't want to deal with it, then it's time to let it go.

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The friendship l severed?, whenever l saw her name on the phone l sometimes used to let it ring to the answering machine. Got to love caller ID

We didn't have callerID because, most of the time, ID didn't get the number......and I believe she was blocked at her end anyway. When the phone rang, my heart would just stop. It got so bad that I would plead with Rick to answer the phone and I was always "busy". Then we both left the phone ring, because neither of us wanted to deal with her. It would go to the answering machine, but she never left a message. We knew it was her though. It got to the point where she would just call and call and call and.........one day, I took the phone off the hook! I couldn't deal with the phone ringing constantly that day. Thankfully, the relationship finally ended. It was that bad.

Winchester said:

  It got to the point where she would just call and call and call and.........one day, I took the phone off the hook! I couldn't deal with the phone ringing constantly that day. Thankfully, the relationship finally ended. It was that bad.

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Isn't it terrible that you have to do that in your own home though?! 

I just removed 2 negative people from my facebook today.  I don't see why people are that way.

dejolane