spaying my semi tamed feral cat

I recently took in a semi feral mother cat ( all kittens found homes) and she now trusts me quite a bit we can touch and pet her 
she also allowed me to put a collar on her, she follows me around and comes on the bed to sleep by me and sit on the couch with me 
but she hates being picked up or put in small areas like crates and such.

It's like she can tell we wanna put her in the kennel/crate to take her some where and sometimes she will go back into her distrustful stages again so how should I bring her to the vet or is a mobile vet a smarter and less traumatic way to deal with this?

and I have an additional question, I find when she got her collar off a couple times she goes back to the very first stages of distrust, she hides behind the toilet and hisses and gets all panicky when you try to approach her , is that normal ? and I did not force the collar back on I used my other cat which calmed her down and slipped the collar on when she was less tense then bam went back to acting like a normal cat again



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Oh she is adorable!

Cats can sense when you're nervous, it's like they have ESP honestly!  Ritz is the same way.

A couple of things you can try:  leave out the cat carrier 24x7 so she can get use to it.  Put food / treats in it; act nonchalantly.  About a half hour before the appointed time, spray the cat carrier with Feliway or similar calming agent.  You could try giving her Rescue Remedy (it's a liquid) in her food a few days before the vet visit.

And the hardest:  block out your emotions; don't let her see you sweat.  Don't dilly dally.  Much much easier said than done.  I tell myself it is for Ritz' good. 

If you have access to a mobile vet, then by all means use them.  Even if they require you to put the cat in a carrier, you won't have to drive. 

Now, regarding the collar:  sorry, I don't have any experience with collars.  Ritz won't let me put one around her.  Is there a particular reason why you are putting a collar around her?  She may associate the reason with her behavior.  How is she around your resident cat--if your resident cat has also worn the collar, she may be reacting to that as well.

Finally, I'm assuming you don't know much about your kitty's history; no telling what she is reacting to, what memories.  Based on Ritz' behavior, I think someone may have made lots of sudden noises or movement because even after three years of living with me, she still crouches in the fight-or-flight posture when I make a sudden move/noise.

Hi thanks and I know quite a bit, a friend of mine lived by the alley she lived in with her mother and other sibling 
she knew fraidy( my kitty) as a kitten and that's partly the reason she adjusted so nicely, even now she's rubbing against my leg "murring"

and yes my other cat has a collar with a apartment tag, address and rabies tag and the apartment manager said we should probably do it for her and well she had no problems when i put it on the first 2 times but now when she doesn't have it she's panicky, scared and hides or runs away the minute you make a sound which I find weird and just wanted to know if i should just remove the collar and start the socializing stages all over again or just leave it and worry about it if it gets worse 

Oh and she's actually quite fond of my other cat and no it's a new collar as my other cats too small for her to use a used collar from her 

*Something* happened to her when she was wearing the collar, at least in her mind.

Is she in indoor/outdoor cat?

I would refrain from putting a collar on her unless absolutely necessary.

In lieu of a collar, you might consider microchipping her.

but she's calmer and more like a normal cat when wearing the collar and way more friendly is that bad?

Oh sorry I misunderstood.

So, she is calmer when she is wearing the collar?

Yeah thats whats weird i didn't notice till she collar was too loose and slipped off and all the sudden it was like she was back to square one but once I got the collar back on using my other cat to calm her she went back to the normal cuddly self like nothing happened and it's happened 3 times I think (nico my other cat likes biting and playing with the tags on her collar) and it's the same thing 
she hides and gets all panicky till I put the collar back on