So those as many of you do know I have had lots of problems with hubby, and now we are getting counseling - this was part something my therapist told us, and part stuff I wrote, I think it is for the general population- what does everyone think? Even though it says "he" it is He/She.
How to be Mature
REGARDING YOURSELF
1) Remember personal care things. Brushing teeth, changing underwear, putting on deodorant etc
2) Be Responsible- Hold down a steady job
3) Lose the negative self talk. Anyone who is overly negative with low self esteem will be seen as immature
4) Eliminate Magic Thinking- “Magical Thinking” is what occurs when you think something will happen without any effort on your part, this thinking is often seen in the mindset of children, but should not be in adults
5) Be diligent with your time, learn to time things effectively and you will accomplish more.
6) Recognize and appropriate express your anger, bottling things inside will make you either shut down or explode- both of which are immature behaviors.
7) At some point you will fail, deal with it. Get up- dust yourself off and move on
8) However, failing at some task does not make you a failure- remember this
9) Understand why you do what you do. “I don’t know why I did that” is a childish and immature mindset, cast this away.
REGARDING OTHERS
10) Help our whenever possible without being asked
11) Talk about relevant topics, while there is a time to goof off and joke around- remember your age.
12) Put the other person first and care about them. This means, get rid of all selfish thinking.
13) Quit victimizing yourself and making excuses for your behavior. ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY
14) If you did something wrong, freely admit guilt, apologize, and move on
15) Ask for help when you need it- put away pride and ego
16) Tell the truth NO MATTER WHAT and NO MATTER WHAT THE CONSEQUENCES, be honest
REGARDING PROPERTY
17) If you move it, put it back where you got it
18) If you break it , lose it, or destroy it- replace or fix it
19) Always ask permission to borrow another’
Some of the characteristics of the person who has achieved true adulthood are suggested here:
1. He accepts criticism gratefully, being honestly glad for an opportunity to improve.
2. He does not indulge in self-pity. He has begun to feel the laws of compensation opertaing in all life.
3. He does not expect special consideration from anyone.
6. His feelings are not easily hurt.
7. He accepts the responsibility of his own acts without trying to "alibi".
10. He is a good loser. He can endure defeat and disappointment without whining or complaining.
11. He does not worry unduly about things he cannot help.
12. He is not given to boasting or "showing off" in socially unacceptable ways.
16. He plans things in advance rather than trusting to the inspiration of the moment.
Last of all we think in terms of spiritual maturity.
3. He obeys the spiritual essence of the Golden Rule: "Though shalt love thy neighbor as theyself."
(From the "Moral and Spiritual Values in Education," used by the Los Angeles City Schools as part of their education program.)
How to be Mature
REGARDING YOURSELF
1) Remember personal care things. Brushing teeth, changing underwear, putting on deodorant etc
2) Be Responsible- Hold down a steady job
3) Lose the negative self talk. Anyone who is overly negative with low self esteem will be seen as immature
4) Eliminate Magic Thinking- “Magical Thinking” is what occurs when you think something will happen without any effort on your part, this thinking is often seen in the mindset of children, but should not be in adults
5) Be diligent with your time, learn to time things effectively and you will accomplish more.
6) Recognize and appropriate express your anger, bottling things inside will make you either shut down or explode- both of which are immature behaviors.
7) At some point you will fail, deal with it. Get up- dust yourself off and move on
8) However, failing at some task does not make you a failure- remember this
9) Understand why you do what you do. “I don’t know why I did that” is a childish and immature mindset, cast this away.
REGARDING OTHERS
10) Help our whenever possible without being asked
11) Talk about relevant topics, while there is a time to goof off and joke around- remember your age.
12) Put the other person first and care about them. This means, get rid of all selfish thinking.
13) Quit victimizing yourself and making excuses for your behavior. ACCEPT RESPONSIBILITY
14) If you did something wrong, freely admit guilt, apologize, and move on
15) Ask for help when you need it- put away pride and ego
16) Tell the truth NO MATTER WHAT and NO MATTER WHAT THE CONSEQUENCES, be honest
REGARDING PROPERTY
17) If you move it, put it back where you got it
18) If you break it , lose it, or destroy it- replace or fix it
19) Always ask permission to borrow another’
Some of the characteristics of the person who has achieved true adulthood are suggested here:
1. He accepts criticism gratefully, being honestly glad for an opportunity to improve.
2. He does not indulge in self-pity. He has begun to feel the laws of compensation opertaing in all life.
3. He does not expect special consideration from anyone.
6. His feelings are not easily hurt.
7. He accepts the responsibility of his own acts without trying to "alibi".
10. He is a good loser. He can endure defeat and disappointment without whining or complaining.
11. He does not worry unduly about things he cannot help.
12. He is not given to boasting or "showing off" in socially unacceptable ways.
16. He plans things in advance rather than trusting to the inspiration of the moment.
Last of all we think in terms of spiritual maturity.
3. He obeys the spiritual essence of the Golden Rule: "Though shalt love thy neighbor as theyself."
(From the "Moral and Spiritual Values in Education," used by the Los Angeles City Schools as part of their education program.)