Criticism over how much you spend on your cats

i totally understand how u feel - been there, done that. so dont worry - ure not the only one! hang in there! x

melalpha said:

Sounds like you're still down. For what it's worth.. I had a critically sick cat, and I was ready to sign over my car, yes, my car, to save him by covering vet bills. The emergency vet clinic will probably forever remember me as the girl who would sell her car for one cat, and never has a dry eye. The car wasn't cheap either. A Subaru outback in great condition. But could I drive this car again, knowing I didn't do everything i could to save him? No. Fortunately, they cut me a deal til morning, until I could run to the bank and see if I was approved for financing.
Once again, I reiterate, you are not alone. Many people do not understand the love and bond cats can share with people. A life is a life. You don't need to explain or divulge to people that won't understand.
I just read about this guy who founded a center in new jersey, a rescue, and a vet clinic in one. His cat, Tabby, was diagnosed with terminal cancer and died. He questioned his life after that, quit his job, and started the center. They like to take on special needs cats, although they take on normal cats too. This is a guy, whose life revolved around a cat, now cats, and turned it into something positive. Keep this in mind, and take heart. Don't mind those who mind your business.

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Tabby's Place!  I was on the crf support list that Tabby's owner was on, before he was able to bring his vision to life.  I support them as much as I can - it's a *wonderful* sanctuary.

Tabby's place! Thank you, the name was just on the tip of my tongue. Thank you, also, for supporting an amazing thing like this.

I wanted to thank everyone again for the replies; it's always comforting to hear from other dedicated cat parents/caretakers.  We've had a couple of vet visits since I posted this for two of my seniors, both of whom are doing well.  I also fell ill myself which conveniently excused me from holiday gatherings with my future in-laws lol  We have both learned from our last experience and will be careful not to mention future vet visits/cat finances/etc to my partner's family. 

Ignore them and inform them politely and firmly it really is none of their business how you choose to spend your money. Period. My standard response is something like, "Well, that really shouldn't concern you and is not any of your business" . Works every time.

The-key,in-any-discussion/debate,is-not-to-stand-there-and-defend-yourself.Do-not-let-them-put-you-on-the-spot.

Turn-it-around,put-the-ball-back-in-their-court.

Mike-has-a-good-comeback.

Another-one.....if-today-is-Sunday.....say,isn't-today-Monday?They-will-say,no-its-Sunday.Then-you-say,well,Monday-is-your-day-to-tell-me-what-to-do,if-today-is-Sunday,then-you-will-have-to-wait-your-turn.Then-walk-away.

You-just-put-it-back-on-them,lol.

This-one-always,works,but-ya-can't-back-down,lol.

Ask-them-how-often-they-have-s**,and-does-their-BF,GF,etc,satisfy-them?

Say-it-serious,with-a-straight-face.

They-will-get-blow-up,be-prepared-for-it,and-will-say,thats-none-of-your-business.

Then-you-say,yet-you-feel-the-need,to-comment-on/ask-about-something,that-is-none-of-your-business.

You-just-turned-it-around,and-put-it-back-on-them,LOL,LOL.LOL

If-they-ask-you,how-much-something-costs,say,I-will-tell-you,for....$528.64.They-will-get-upset,then-you-say,well,then-you-really-don't-want-to-know-that-bad.Turn-it-around,put-it-back-on-them.

Originally posted by NutroMike

Ignore them and inform them politely and firmly it really is none of their business how you choose to spend your money. Period. My standard response is something like, "Well, that really shouldn't concern you and is not any of your business" . Works every time.

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It is the absolute best way to deal with rude people. It is also necessary NOT to share information with such people because they are the type who will use whatever we share with them, against us. Not sharing things that are none of their business is the only way to prevent these kinds of problems.  It's very effective.   

Exactly. You don't need to stoop to their level, but just be firm.

I agree that you should do your best to ignore them. I mostly just don't tell anyone how much I spend, so no one criticizes, but if they did, it wouldn't make me very happy..


I Must ask though: if you've never gone on a vacation, never gone out to eat, and never go anywhere, what do you do for fun?????

Yeah, I know someone who's always nagging at us because we buy Ella everything. If the bill's are paid and everything is in tact and I wan't to spoil her so be it. I get to spoil myself and my husband so why can't I spoil my cat? I'd rather make sure she's healthy before anything else. I was telling someone that I had to take Ella in for her annual booster and 2nd rabies shot & I mentioned that it was going to be $18.00 (which isn't bad. I've called around and the prices are "up" there. $65.00-$80.00 which still isn't bad but If I didn't go to our local vet that charges way less I still would have taken her in cause she needs proper health) & she complained on how much money it was and that I was going to have to give my cat away.  Um what?!?  um NO! not happening! 

The nerve of some people. btw i'm sorry that you have to go through that. Just don't worry about them, it's not their business. Your doing a fantastic job! 

Oh & I forgot to say that I know someone who is so caught stuck on material things and was never home with her cat that I blame her for her cat's death. why? because she neglected him. he was only a baby about 12 weeks she left him home alone for a week + and he got into her pill and ended up eating pain killers   poor little guy suffered for a week. I called around for her different vet's emergency vets and everything and she didnt do nothing to help him because she wanted to do other things with her money and have a good ol time! so selfish!! & she didn't want to get charged with animal cruelty. The nerve of some people. So she came home and found him dead  

Someone complained about $18? How much do they think it should cost?? :/

And that's horrible... I would have been up at night crying of that happened to me..

I agree, just don't tell that person about your cat, she obviously doesn't have the kind of understanding it takes to appreciate what you're telling her... same reason why I don't talk to most of my family (except my mom) about cats. They're all dog people. Cats are just "outdoor animals" to most of them, something it would be ridiculous to spend money on, much less get emotionally attached to. Maybe see if you can find somebody who also loves cats, and that way you can encourage each other, and talk to that friend about other topics that you both appreciate... there's no point wasting your enthusiasm for cats on someone who's just going to put you down for it.
 

As for giving up your cat... that kind of comment is way out of line, even from someone who doesn't personally know what it's like to care for an animal. I think if someone said something like that to me, I really wouldn't talk to them again, period. Sheesh, what were they thinking... you just don't say that kind of thing to people. Especially over a measly $18.00! 0.o