Could use some emotional support

My cat has CHF.  I am an emotional wreck over the entire situation, and my husband thinks I'm "over-reacting."  We don't have any children, so I have an very strong bond with my cat.  He is on medication, and does pretty good during the day, but seems to have a harder time at night when he's trying to sleep.  He has a hard time getting comfortable, and he also has chronic bronchitis so when he coughs, it's non-productive and very distressing.  I can't treat him for the bronchitis because I can't give him an inhaler.  He was born feral and still has a "wild side" when trying to do anything he doesn't like.  I can't stress him out because it's very dangerous for his heart.  I feel helpless, not knowing when things will turn really bad, and I can't sleep at night from the anxiety it is causing.  I got some medication from the Doctor, but that isn't even working all of the time.  About a month ago he spent 2 nights in ICU, which is when he was diagnosed.  It was horrible, and I'm so afraid of facing that situation all over again.  I don't want him to suffer, but I'm afraid there's probably no way around that in the end.  I'm trying to mentally prepare, but it's causing me more anxiety than it is producing results.  How do I shut my mind down from the bad thoughts of what will happen, and take each day one at a time and cherish what time I have left with him?  I don't want to ever let him down, he depends on me for everything.  Any suggestions from anyone who has been down this road or is going through it also?

Well, my cats are my children too, so I know what you are feeling .  And my Sven , who we lost in March, had CRF, so we worried over him for the last 3 years of his life.  I was so concerned about him suffering that I was constantly asking him if he was ready to leave me, and one day told me he was.  It made me strong and able to help him cross the bridge.

Everyone always said I'd know when the time was right, and I did.  You will too.  I'm not saying it's anytime soon, but just watch him and talk to him and let him know that you won't let him suffer when the time comes...that you'll be strong  for him.  And, of course, talk to your Vet about what's happening with him.  I don't know what kind of relationship you have with your Vet, but I was able to call whenever anything unusual happened and just discuss it over the phone.  When "the time" came, she cried as hard as we did

Has your Vet not told you what signs to look for to indicate his medications are not working anymore, or is he not on any heart meds? 

Hi, My heart goes out to you at this very difficult time. From experience having lost one of my furry family to FIV and one to cancer at 6 years I know its practically impossible to switch your head off, however some things to consider...

If you are stressed, he will pick up on it, you have to have a positive mind set for him (god I know its difficult), next, you have committed to give him the best chance possible, you need to be strong for him and the decision you have made because thats what you promised him. Lastly, the last responsible thing you can do for him is accept when he tells you he is ready to go and do the right thing regardless of how you want to hang on to him.

You need to take a deap breath and try to rationalise your feelings. Enjoy every minuite you have with him and dont let shadows intrude, he could have a good long time left yet and you dont want to shroud your memories in saddness!

Hope this is of some comfort  / help.

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Mandy and gang

Thank you so much for your words of encouragement.  I'm trying so hard to switch my mind on a more positive outlook, but I just can't get past the fear right now.  I know he can feel my stress, and I don't want that.  I want him to feel as good as he can for as long as he can.  I'm just so afraid every second that things might turn and I won't be prepared to handle it.  I will try very hard to take your advice.  Thank you so much for taking the time to offer your support, it really means everything to me at this difficult time.  I'm also very sorry for your losses.

Thank you so much for your reply and emotional support.  The vet has not told me specifically what to watch for, but I feel it will be obvious enough when that time comes.  I lost my Queenie at the age of 17 to cancer, and there was no doubt when it was her time.  My Tabby is on meds right now, and I am just trying so hard not to focus on every breath he takes.  Whenever he seems uncomfortable, I get anxious and then can't sleep.  Then, in the morning he seems fine.  His appetite is still very good.  I'm guessing when he isn't feeling well that will start to change.  I'm just so afraid it will happen so quickly that I won't have time to thing straight.  I just want to do right by him.  He also has chronic bronchitis, so he has two strikes against him.  I just don't want him to suffer.  I'm so sorry for your terrible loss, thank you for offering your support, it means a lot to me at this difficult time.

By what you have said, you are already prepared for it, Even though you dont want to acknowledge it. None of us cope well when we lose someone we love. Please enjoy your time with your boy and keep me informed of how he is doing. My sister is a spiritual healer and if you would like her to send some Reki to puss feel free to PM me with his name, specific condition and  address (pics are helpful if you have some). She doesnt charge and does this purely for the love of animals. She wont make him better but might be able to give him some ease. X

Cuddle him Lots. xx

Thank you so much for your kind words of support.  I do have photos of him, I will have to search through to find a good one to post.  I am appreciative and open to anything that could help him.  He is so dear to me, we have such a strong bond.  I do cuddle him every chance I get.  My lap and my shoulder are the only places that exist in his mind.   Thank you again for caring enough to respond to my post.  Hopefully we will both sleep a little better tonight.