Hello Pam, I was pointed towards this forum as you may be one to help me as I posted over on the Cat S.O.S forum. I apologize that this may get a bit long, but I want to provide as much information as possible.
I bought a male kitten from a breeder about 3.5 years ago, in this thread I'll refer to him as resident cat #1 or RS1. He is one that doesn't like to be picked up or held but will come to you on his own terms for affection. This isn't to say that he is distant or dislikes being petted - also I want to note that he has never once scratched me, I am contributing this to the breeder as she socializes her kittens. Also he has never once shown any signs of aggression to me or my dogs. When other people come over he runs and hides and will not show himself ever. He loves my two labs and has tried to nurse from one of them (both my labs are female) on several occasions throughout the years.
Feeling guilty for buying instead of adopting knowing full well the state of dogs and cats in the US, after a few months (I want to say 6ish or so month) I went out and adopted a male cat that was right around 1 year old. I'll refer to him as resident cat #2 or RS2. At first he seemed to have the personality of RS1 in the fact that he didn't like to be petted or picked up. At the house he was extremely destructive even though he was given plenty of things to scratch instead of furniture - which he did but he also scratched upped every thing else. He knows the word 'no' and it seemed like he scratched things he wasn't suppose to to gain attention from me, however anytime I wanted to give him positive attention he didn't want it. For example he would scratch the couch as I was sitting on it and he would look right at me when doing so and then would bolt once I turned my head. Like RS1 he never shown any signs of aggression towards me or my dogs, and unlike RS1 when people came over he would hide but if they weren't loud he would show himself.
We lived in a 1 bedroom place for 3ish years and recently (1 month ago) moved to a larger house. Since the move RS2's destructive behavior is a thing of the past. He has been a perfect angel and has even grown very affectionate towards myself. I should note that prior both RS1 and RS2 did sleep in the bed with me, RS1 would sleep cuddled up next to the dogs and RS2 at the foot of the bed. Now RS2 prefers to sleep up against me and often times will seek me out to be held and petted.
A week after the move I saw a craigslist ad from someone looking to re-home their 5 year old male cat. I figured since the age range was all around the same that it would be worth looking into (same activity level and what not). I'll refer to this cat as new cat or NC. After speaking with the owner they informed me that they were looking for a new home for NC because of his current living situation. They have two smaller dogs (under 25lbs each) that do nothing but chase and bark at NC so originally they were looking for a home without dogs. They didn't know how NC would do with other cats but figured he would be alright. They had the ad up on craigslist for over 2 months and since they were asking a higher fee then most there weren't a lot of hits for NC. The owners and I sat down and I explained to them what his living arrangements might be and that things may or may not work out but it would take time. The previous owners and I decided that if my house doesn't work out for him or my other animals that we would work together to find him a home that would. I really want to make my home his.
So I have had NC in a safe room since the get go, at first he would hiss and growl at me on sight and would hide behind his litter box every chance I had to see him. I made it a point to visit him just for ordinary daily things like reading the newspaper (would read it out loud hoping he'd get use to the sound of my voice). After about a week I started to do the scent trading, RS1 responded well to it as there was no response, RS2 however would hiss at the blanket. Well, one day as I was changing around blankets NC darted out the door and ran into RS1 - lots of hissing and growling took place. I managed to get RS1 away as he would let me pick him up (and I want to note that as soon as I got him in my arms he retracted all claws), however NC went missing in the house. The house I moved into is a rather large older style house with tons of nooks and crannies. Eventually I found NC after a week - he was in the ceiling. I baited a humane trap with tuna and got him the next night and put him back in the safe room. So now I was back to square one with the scent trading and what not.
I should note the layout of the lower level of my house as that's key in this next part. There is a large room that I use as my PC room/fish room, connected to this room is the utility room, a large bathroom (NC's safe room) and a walk in closet. In the utility room is where I keep the litter box (cat genie) for both RS1 and RS2. It is impossible to reach unless the door to the PC/Fish room is open.
Alright, so fast forward a week and I am closing both the PC/Fish room door, the utility room door and the walk in closet door and opening the safe room door to see if NC will come out and explore a bit on his own. I do this every day for a few hours and eventually he starts to come out and explore the place - he loves the large 3 windows and he found his 'spot' which is up on top of a book case. So I want him to have as long as possible in the larger room out of his safe room so I leave him alone while I run upstairs to do dishes or take the dogs out (I forget exactly what I was doing). It was about 15 minutes later that I come back downstairs and open up the door and let myself and my dogs in...
I should note that all the while I let him explore the larger PC/Fish room I have let my labs in there with me. One lab is 13 so could care less about the NC and the other is very gentle around cats and backs off when needed. I wanted NC to get use to the dogs first as he was use to them terrorizing him at his other place. He hissed at both labs and did a very half hearted swat at my younger lab (she didn't retaliate at all - she's very good around cats) and since then things between NC and labs has been just fine.
Alright, so I go to let myself and dogs into the PC/Fish room and RS1 slips in and all hell breaks lose. I thought one of them was going to die based off the sound of the fight. RS1 chased NC back into the ceiling (I blocked off the entrance with cardboard until I could get to the hardware store. He hadn't made any attempts of trying since I got him down so I thought it was fine, guess when push came to shove he decided to go straight through the cardboard verse dealing with RS1. After inspecting RS1 I found no injuries, after re-trapping NC and expecting him the best I could there were no injuries to him as well. It sounded 1000 times worse then what it actually was I guess.
So now I have NC back in the safe room however he cries constantly to be let out and I feel extremely bad. I should also note NC now lets me pet his head a little bit but still hisses at me and in no way would let me pick him up so room swapping is out. I also have the Feliway plug ins but I also have every window in the house open as it's gorgeous outside so I'm not sure that they're really doing anything.
I guess my question is, where do I go from here? What's the best next step to take? Besides the scent trading with the blankets is there some other way I can get them to not kill each other?
I know that it's rare for all three of them to become best buddies, what I'm hoping for is a peaceful coexistence.
I bought a male kitten from a breeder about 3.5 years ago, in this thread I'll refer to him as resident cat #1 or RS1. He is one that doesn't like to be picked up or held but will come to you on his own terms for affection. This isn't to say that he is distant or dislikes being petted - also I want to note that he has never once scratched me, I am contributing this to the breeder as she socializes her kittens. Also he has never once shown any signs of aggression to me or my dogs. When other people come over he runs and hides and will not show himself ever. He loves my two labs and has tried to nurse from one of them (both my labs are female) on several occasions throughout the years.
Feeling guilty for buying instead of adopting knowing full well the state of dogs and cats in the US, after a few months (I want to say 6ish or so month) I went out and adopted a male cat that was right around 1 year old. I'll refer to him as resident cat #2 or RS2. At first he seemed to have the personality of RS1 in the fact that he didn't like to be petted or picked up. At the house he was extremely destructive even though he was given plenty of things to scratch instead of furniture - which he did but he also scratched upped every thing else. He knows the word 'no' and it seemed like he scratched things he wasn't suppose to to gain attention from me, however anytime I wanted to give him positive attention he didn't want it. For example he would scratch the couch as I was sitting on it and he would look right at me when doing so and then would bolt once I turned my head. Like RS1 he never shown any signs of aggression towards me or my dogs, and unlike RS1 when people came over he would hide but if they weren't loud he would show himself.
We lived in a 1 bedroom place for 3ish years and recently (1 month ago) moved to a larger house. Since the move RS2's destructive behavior is a thing of the past. He has been a perfect angel and has even grown very affectionate towards myself. I should note that prior both RS1 and RS2 did sleep in the bed with me, RS1 would sleep cuddled up next to the dogs and RS2 at the foot of the bed. Now RS2 prefers to sleep up against me and often times will seek me out to be held and petted.
A week after the move I saw a craigslist ad from someone looking to re-home their 5 year old male cat. I figured since the age range was all around the same that it would be worth looking into (same activity level and what not). I'll refer to this cat as new cat or NC. After speaking with the owner they informed me that they were looking for a new home for NC because of his current living situation. They have two smaller dogs (under 25lbs each) that do nothing but chase and bark at NC so originally they were looking for a home without dogs. They didn't know how NC would do with other cats but figured he would be alright. They had the ad up on craigslist for over 2 months and since they were asking a higher fee then most there weren't a lot of hits for NC. The owners and I sat down and I explained to them what his living arrangements might be and that things may or may not work out but it would take time. The previous owners and I decided that if my house doesn't work out for him or my other animals that we would work together to find him a home that would. I really want to make my home his.
So I have had NC in a safe room since the get go, at first he would hiss and growl at me on sight and would hide behind his litter box every chance I had to see him. I made it a point to visit him just for ordinary daily things like reading the newspaper (would read it out loud hoping he'd get use to the sound of my voice). After about a week I started to do the scent trading, RS1 responded well to it as there was no response, RS2 however would hiss at the blanket. Well, one day as I was changing around blankets NC darted out the door and ran into RS1 - lots of hissing and growling took place. I managed to get RS1 away as he would let me pick him up (and I want to note that as soon as I got him in my arms he retracted all claws), however NC went missing in the house. The house I moved into is a rather large older style house with tons of nooks and crannies. Eventually I found NC after a week - he was in the ceiling. I baited a humane trap with tuna and got him the next night and put him back in the safe room. So now I was back to square one with the scent trading and what not.
I should note the layout of the lower level of my house as that's key in this next part. There is a large room that I use as my PC room/fish room, connected to this room is the utility room, a large bathroom (NC's safe room) and a walk in closet. In the utility room is where I keep the litter box (cat genie) for both RS1 and RS2. It is impossible to reach unless the door to the PC/Fish room is open.
Alright, so fast forward a week and I am closing both the PC/Fish room door, the utility room door and the walk in closet door and opening the safe room door to see if NC will come out and explore a bit on his own. I do this every day for a few hours and eventually he starts to come out and explore the place - he loves the large 3 windows and he found his 'spot' which is up on top of a book case. So I want him to have as long as possible in the larger room out of his safe room so I leave him alone while I run upstairs to do dishes or take the dogs out (I forget exactly what I was doing). It was about 15 minutes later that I come back downstairs and open up the door and let myself and my dogs in...
I should note that all the while I let him explore the larger PC/Fish room I have let my labs in there with me. One lab is 13 so could care less about the NC and the other is very gentle around cats and backs off when needed. I wanted NC to get use to the dogs first as he was use to them terrorizing him at his other place. He hissed at both labs and did a very half hearted swat at my younger lab (she didn't retaliate at all - she's very good around cats) and since then things between NC and labs has been just fine.
Alright, so I go to let myself and dogs into the PC/Fish room and RS1 slips in and all hell breaks lose. I thought one of them was going to die based off the sound of the fight. RS1 chased NC back into the ceiling (I blocked off the entrance with cardboard until I could get to the hardware store. He hadn't made any attempts of trying since I got him down so I thought it was fine, guess when push came to shove he decided to go straight through the cardboard verse dealing with RS1. After inspecting RS1 I found no injuries, after re-trapping NC and expecting him the best I could there were no injuries to him as well. It sounded 1000 times worse then what it actually was I guess.
So now I have NC back in the safe room however he cries constantly to be let out and I feel extremely bad. I should also note NC now lets me pet his head a little bit but still hisses at me and in no way would let me pick him up so room swapping is out. I also have the Feliway plug ins but I also have every window in the house open as it's gorgeous outside so I'm not sure that they're really doing anything.
I guess my question is, where do I go from here? What's the best next step to take? Besides the scent trading with the blankets is there some other way I can get them to not kill each other?
I know that it's rare for all three of them to become best buddies, what I'm hoping for is a peaceful coexistence.
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