What do you guys think about this one? (Adopting out a semi-feral)

ziggy'smom

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As some may remember I have a foster cat named Annie who is semi-feral. She does fine here in the cat group but she doesn't want us humans to come near her and we can only pet her occasionally under the right circumstances, like when she's very relaxed on our bed or in the little cat house. It's not very often. Maybe just once a month, if even that.

Despite her issues we decided to post her for adoption anyway hoping that there is a person out there crazy enough to be willing to adopt a cat like Annie. She's very pretty and that helps. She gets more hits on her Petfinder page than all our other cats combined.

Well, we had a lady come look at her yesterday and low and behold she's interested! In fact she says that she's certain. She wants to adopt Annie as a companion for her existing cat. It sounds like a very good home and the lady seems to have a pretty good hand with cats. She was able to sit just a couple of feet away from Annie without Annie freaking out. And, even more amazingly, she managed to pick her up. She wasn't picked up willingly or anything but she didn't scratch and after she was put down she didn't run out of the room or tried to climb up the walls as I would have expected. So far so good. I do believe that in the right environment, especially one without dogs, Annie could make more progress and maybe this lady could get her to a place I haven't been able to.

But I'm a bit concerned that this lady doesn't quite understand what Annie's problems are. She thinks that she's so afraid because someone has done something very bad to her. She is of the opinion that Annie just needs love and that's not how it is. It's possible that someone could have done something to her when she was a kitten but I don't think so. Annie is fearful because she was not socialized with humans during the early stages of her brain development when an animal can be easily tamed. By the time I got her that stage had already passed. It's kind of like a child who isn't exposed to language before age 4. They will never be able to learn to speak properly because that stage of their development has passed. Annie can definitely make progress. She has made progress. But I don't think she will ever be like other cats and I think that she will always keep her distance to an extent and I don't think this lady understands that at all. It's entirely possible that she will make very little progress and may live the rest of her life in a separate room, hiding when people come too close. It seems like this lady believes that if she takes Annie home and gives her love Annie will learn that she doesn't have to be afraid of her and things will be okay. But that's not how it works. If it was she would have understood that my husband and I are not a threat to her some time during the two years I've had her.

So, how do you guys think I should deal with this? I've tried to explain all these things to her both over the phone and when she was here but she seems a bit dismissive of what I'm saying insisting that something must have been done to Annie. She says that in her country many cats live outside when they are kittens and they are not like that. She also says that some of Annie's behaviors are typical to the breed she's mixed with (she's had several cats of that breed which is why she is interested in Annie).

Part of the problem in explaining things to this lady is that there is a bit of a language barrier.

I would be thrilled if Annie was adopted but I want to make sure that the adopter completely understands what her problems are so that she doesn't end up getting returned or don't have a good life. I don't want the adopter to be disappointed when she realizes that things didn't turn out the way she had hoped and end up regretting the adoption.

What do you guys think I should do? Should I just let her adopt Annie and hope for the best? Any advice is welcome.

Thanks for reading my very long post:)
 

kailie

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I think you have been very upfront and honest with this person and it really seems that she would be a good fit for Annie. I certainly wouldn't deny her, as she may be the only option this precious kitty has for a forever home. With so many kitties and so few homes, where this woman sounds so excited and happy to adopt Annie, it might just work out purrrrfectly!
 

rosiemac

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My Jack was semi feral as a kitten. He's just turned 5 years old and he's still afraid of strangers until he gets really used to them.

It took 2 years before he let me walk past him on the stairs,  but l learnt never to make eye contact with him as l went up and his confidence grew, but even now he's still a bit skittish at times.

Sometimes he can be upstairs on the hallway as i'm going upstairs and he usually  head butts me through the hand rail, but sometimes he freezes in terror with his back sunk low and his eyes all huge until l stop in my tracks and speak softly to him and put my hand out for him to sniff

If she has the patience  they'll both get along fine 
 
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ritz

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I agree with the other posters; I would let the lady adopt Annie.  You've told her all about Annie's personalitiy, and she seems willing and able to work with Annie.
 

tarasgirl06

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I would consider adopting Annie out to this lady only if:  1. Annie will be indoors-only and 2. There is the provision that you be allowed to do in-home visits and take Annie back if for any reason the match is not a good one.  I don't agree entirely with the reasoning that feral cats never habituate to living with humans, as this has not been the case for many feral cats whose stories I have read.  Our own "ex-feral" cats have been a mixed bunch -- some have remained entirely feral, some have adapted fairly well, and some have taken the plunge completely, becoming "lap cats" extraordinaire.  So, with those thoughts in mind, I wish Annie a happy, healthy, long and LOVED life, and hope it may be with this lady who's interested in her, and her family.
 

p3 and the king

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I would agree to it if I could do a home visit first.  And then face to face tell her your concerns with Annie.  If she dismisses them again I would be concerned sure but it doesn't neccessarily mean she doesn't understand you.  I would tell her if for any reason it doesn't work out, she would not find another home for Annie, but just return her to you. 
 

feralvr

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This does sound like the perfect home for Annie to me. I would let her go to this lady. This lady seems to have a connection with Annie and it is very possible that being in a home with only ONE other cat, might bring her out of her comfort zone a bit more, in time. As long as you told this lady up front that it is possible that Annie may never be a lap cat OR even a "petting" kind of cat and may spend a lot of time hiding, then you did everything right. IF she still want's Annie, by all means do a home check and let her go :nod: Good LUCK and yes, I agree with Susan, tell her about TCS!!!!!!!!!!! A fun, supportive, loving community of cat lover's :heart3: :vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes::vibes:
 
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