Socializing a feral cat.

Hi, I'm new on this site and am not sure how it works. I feed 3 feral cats on the picnic table on my deck. I have been feeding them on and off for 3 years and just started feeding them everyday this past fall.  One of them, (I've named Tiger, he's the picture I use as my avatar) Has had a degloved tail since before Christmas. I found a live trap and caught him and my Vet repaired his tail and neutered him for me. He is now in my spare bedroom and has been for 3 weeks. I'm trying to socialize him but I'm afraid I'm not doing it right. I found an artical that gave me some good info and turned me toward this web site.  I'm just trying to find people that are or have done this before that I can compare notes with and get some help from to socialize Tiger.  Am I in the right place?  Can anyone help me out?  Thanks for listening!

Hi and welcome to the TCS site and our Forums!

Oh, yes, you have come to the just right place!  Many of us at this forum, are either active rescuers and or fosterers, or very interested and supportive...

Advices will pour in!

Before we begin, do you have residents? How are they?

Ie is there some for of issue for quarantine.

Dont worry, people comes soon. Otherwise I will return.  

Good luck!   *vibes*

ps.  And please do tell more what is going on with Tiger, how does he behaves, what had you tried to do...

ps 2. You wrote your good vet  neutered him.  Swell, but this means he was not neutered before?

So I suspect the others still outside are not neutered yet?

Please begin to plan on neutering them too. Esp now when you do have this live trap, it will be easier.  We do understand if you do have now a lot to think about, and perhaps tight on money, but - still - please plan on neutering them.

Hi, bless you for taking this guy in and for feeding and caring for him and the other two cats.  I would absolutely agree with Stephan and have the other two spayed/neutered as soon as you are able.

Please give some more details about your kitty.  Are you able to pet him?  My first advice is to just be patient.  It takes time and every cat is different.  But I will also say it is so worth it!  A feral cat brought inside and given time and patience can become the most loving of cats.

I am anxious to hear your progress, I am currently socializing too!

Hi!! My cat Boots is now 7 months old. I socialized him from a feral life at 2 months old.

My main technique was to keep him in my bathroom for 2 weeks, like you've been doing with Tiger. I left a cat carrier in there with a soft fleece blanket inside, and I didn't touch him or bother him while he was inside it. The carrier was his "safe zone" that he could retreat to if he was tired of touching or being around me.

Mainly, I spent as much time with him as I could. I'm a student and this was over the summer, so I had a lot of time on my hands, but whatever you can do is good. If at all possible, spend time with him on a schedule starting ASAP. Cats are huge creatures of habit, and knowing when their person is going to come into the room will reassure them immensely. Give him timed wet meals, as well as leaving kibble out for when you're not there. Most cats love canned wet food, so if you combine the scheduled time with yummy food, he'll warm up quicker.

I mainly laid down on the floor for the first couple of days until he would come out of the carrier. I found that he was a lot less scared of me when I was on "his level," so to speak. If you think about it from a cat's perspective, it makes sense -- a human you don't know, towering over you and reaching down to grab you (and possibly eat you!) is pretty scary. Try laying down on the floor, then progressing slowly to sitting and standing. Also, try to avoid looking at him directly. Cats interpret this as a sign of aggression and dominance.

Play and treat therapy are also great ways to bond with your kitty. Take cat toys with you, especially at first toys that don't require direct interaction with you. Tinkly balls, fuzzy mice, things that skitter across the floor, etc. Boots immediately loved the handheld wand feather toy, although Tiger might not. Play therapy is a great way to distract them from their fear of you while you're in the room, and associate you with something positive, playtime!

Another great tool for socialization is treat therapy. If your boy is food motivated, try bringing in cat treats or pieces of raw chicken to feed him bit by bit while you're there. He'll associate you with the food.

Finally, turn off your "clock" of expectations for his progression in socialization. Every cat is different, and even some people who have non-feral cats find that they never really warm up to their people. He might never be a lap cat or like petting, but eventually he'll most likely want to be around you instead of hiding scared all the time. He might take weeks to be able to come out of his room, so go slowly. Boots is fully socialized now, but he doesn't like strangers (although this is typical for any cat). He has the occasional lap snuggle with me, but mostly just loves to be petted and stroked, and follows me from room to room "helping" with whatever I'm doing.

Good luck, and please keep us updated!!!

Oh, one more thing. If you can manage it, try getting him a cat tree in that bedroom. (The store-bought ones are expensive, but you can make them cheap.) Put it by a window where he can look out and see birds and the outside. Cats think of space vertically, which is why laying down helps, so this might also make him feel more secure.

Hi! Thanks for all the good advice! It seems I'm doing some things right already although I wasen't at first. No I can't pet him at all. He spits if I get to close. And one bad thing is I think he's about 3 years old so he's already set in his ways. I just started going down to his level and not looking directly into his eyes after I read the article on this web site about feral cats a few days ago.  So for the last 2 weeks I've been doing that wrong.  I also was feeding him tuna from a spoon and from what I understand that was also wrong because they are afraid of hands. Is that correct? He was eating it but he'd spit or knock it off of the spoon before he ate it.  But I do have a tall backless shelve in front of the window that he can use like a cat tree and he does. I give him free feeding hard food along with tuna or something yummy every day.He's got a big quilt he likes to hide under and a cardboard box with a hole in it he can go in if he wants. Oh, and he's in my spare bedroom that I learned the hard way, after I put him in there, I had to remove the bedframe and put the matress and box spring on the floor, move all my plants out and clear off the shelf and dresser!! Now it's Tiger proof!  I tryed to play with him for the first time today. I layed on the floor with him about 4 feet away and had feathers on one of those little poles. He only spit once or twice then he just let me sway the feathers over him and around him. He grabbed them in his mouth a couple times and held them down with his paws but I don't think he was actually playing. One good thing, the iris's in his eyes didn't get big. They stayed small.  And I guess thats a good sign. When they get big it means he's scared, am I right?I only go in the room twice a day.  Once in the morning to clean his cat box and fill his food and water dish, and then again in the afternoon to try to socialize him.  I've read to him to get him used to my voice or just sat and talked to him. But only for about 10 miutes or so. I've got another cat named Miesha.  So if by chance I can socilize him, I hope another cat will not be a problem I'm scared he might hurt her.  But, I don't want to get a head of myself. It may be impossible to socialize him because of his age. Well, I think I've covered just about everything.  Anything more I can do? All the advice I can get will be appreciated!!!    Oh, and I plan on getting the one female for sure spayed. But I've got to wait untill I can fit it into my budget. I can't ask my Vet again. I think that would be taking advantage of him. But there's a mobil spay and neuter unit, that makes appointments and it's at a reduced price.Maybe next month I can catch her.  The other cat doesn't come that often. I don't know if he belongs to someone or not.  Anyway, thanks again!  Can't wait to hear from you again.....,.Cathy  (Mishasmom).

Oh, yeah. I couldn't pet Boots at all for the first week or so. It was pretty funny watching a tiny kitten spit at me like some sort of devil. He sure thought he was vicious. :lol3:

You're right, since he's an adult it's going to take longer to socialize him. But don't give up! It's really rewarding in the end.

The overarching goal with socialization is to get the cat to view you as nonthreatening. Think of it from his point of view -- you're an entirely different species that's suddenly taken him out of his home and everything he knows. Now he's in a weird new place, without his cat friends or the ability to hunt, and he doesn't know if you're going to eat him or not. So getting him to be comfortable around you is the end goal. Anything extra -- liking pets, being a snuggler, whatever -- is just bonus points.

As far as his pupils go, I actually find that when my cats are playing (i.e. in hunting mode, as that's the kitty version of "playing" and why cat toys resemble prey), their pupils get the largest they can possibly get. So I think that he doesn't see the wand feathers as a toy/prey thing yet. My guess is if you keep it up he will, though. Try dragging it across the carpet as well as waving it in the air.

As long as you do introductions properly, when you do eventually introduce him to your other resident kitty there shouldn't be problems. But this is no guarantee.

More good luck with socialization vibes!!

Thanks StefanZ!  Hope to hear from you again!

Hi Cathy and Welcome Thank you for caring for the feral cats. First off, I don't know if I would wait to get that female trapped and spayed..... she soon will be going into heat and then you might have many more on your hands to care for hno:... Can you try a TNR group in your area. It is extremely inexpensive. ONly about $35.00 for the sterilization, shots, worming, ear tip, microchip and flea product. Then you would just release her back outside after one day of recovery. You would need a large dog crate to place her in for her 24 hour recovery. Let us know if we can help you further with this process.

You are doing a fantastic job with Tiger. Congratulations. It could potentially take a very long time for him to come around, if ever OR..... it could be a fairly easy process. You just will have to give it some time and have much patience to see if he will be willing to accept connection with a human. It is very, very possible and can be done :nod:!!!!!

You can try the plug-in Feliway diffuser in his room too. Might help him to feel more secure and safe right now. I would spend as much time as you can in that room. Reading quietly outloud, being on your computer (laptop), play some peaceful classical music, put a worn nightshirt of yours in his room, preferable where he hides and sleeps and change it out every other day with your fresh scent. I will try to get some more articles for you to read and will post them for you too. Keep us posted on Tiger :rub:

Here are a couple: http://www.thecatsite.com/a/handling-feral-cats
http://www.thecatsite.com/a/saving-feral-cats
http://www.thecatsite.com/t/16045/h...ng-and-low-cost-or-free-spay-neuter-resources

mieshasmom said:

. I've got another cat named Miesha.  So if by chance I can socilize him, I hope another cat will not be a problem I'm scared he might hurt her.  But, I don't want to get a head of myself. It may be impossible to socialize him because of his age.

Click to expand...

Right, taking in an oldie is almost always more difficult than a young. It takes almost always long time, sometimes you dont success...  Althugh you helping him when he was hurt probably does help some. Almost pity he wasnt hurt really hard - helping a severely hurt ferale does open the window wide open again.

But. It doesnt necessirly matter.  What is socializing, what is to get him tame? You hope to get a loving pet bug out of him. But it may be so, you just manage to get him tame.  And this you will surely do however it goes..

Ie, he will not be pet, but he will accept to live inside the house...  We have forumites who had such a tame semiferale at home. Adopted when they were about 5-6 years old. After 5-6 years inside - they at last did become beloved pets, coming to Mom, asking for petting...

If it is important for you to save a life, it can be done, even if you dont get immediate pleasure out of it.

About your other cat, the resident Miesha.  Usually they dont have big troubles with residents, and tries to be pal with them. He is now neutered, so it will be easier. And if he proceeds to be shy of you, he knows he MUST be pal with her if he shall manage...

And later on, you will have some help from this your friendly(?) resident, being the ambassadeur. He will see you are friendly with this other cat, his pal...

Now, some experienced fosterers prefer to foster the ferale themselves, alone. There is some risk the ferale otherwise will be pal with the resident, will feel it is enough, and will not be eager to be pal with the human...    So do proceed with your tries!

But the other way around IS possible, and if you dont manage to do it on your own, dont resign. There is always this other route via Miesha.

You can also make a compromise: set in a net in the doors, and let him see you play and cuddle with Miesha through the net door (or baby gate).

Good luck!

ps last here.  As said, usually you can do it, this way or another. but sometimes you do notice, it doesnt goes forward, you dont have time nor forces any more,   OR the cat is apparently in distress and not feeling any good inside.  Release?  Yes, sometimes it is the lest bad to do.

It is a horrible crime to dump a home kitty, especielly inside only.  But these are ferales / semiferales, survivors, who did survived several years on their own. So they will manage, especially as they are neutered now, and will proceed to get some protecions.

It is nothing fun to do so, but entirely feasible.

But if you DO have time, will and place, and he doesnt seem to suffer being at your place - it is just to proceed.   The victory will be yours, this way or another..  

StefanZ,  Thanks so much for you advice!  Your friends that had the 5-6 year old feral cat...was the cat that old and totally feral when they brought him into their house?  That gives me a little hope if that was the case.  When I went in his room today he was still spitting and stricking out at me.  It gets a little depressing!  I think I have got to try and spend more time in there with him but it's hard to do when there are other things I have to do. I go in for sure everyday and feed him something good like tuna or cooked hamburger.  I would think , knowing good food coming from me would be a good thing in his mind.  I wish I could understand the thinking of a cat.  I don't think he is suffering, as he will eat the  special food I bring in. I put pieces on a long wooden spoon and give it to him. At first he spits and slaps at the spoon but then he eats it off the spoon.  He seems to enjoy sitting on the stand in front of the window. It's about 4 feet off the floor.  Well, I'm gong to keep trying for a while yet.  If anyone else has any good ideas I'd love to hear them.  Thanks again StefanZ!!

mieshasmom said:

  Your friends that had the 5-6 year old feral cat...was the cat that old and totally feral when they brought him into their house?

Click to expand...

Yes, it was so in both cases.  The first one I heard on "my" swedish forum. the second here.

In Sweden we do have seldom outside kities like is common here in USA, so if you want to save them, the only way to do it is by adopting... That is why I wrote this of saving a life, even if you dont get immediate benefits out of it.  They got them house tame, and so they lived semiferal in the house for several years. Become loving pets first as "senior citizens"

In US you often can have them as outside kitty...

Anyway, it does take time, hopefully shorter than this, but you cant count on one or at most three months...

Yes, food is a strong factor. It doesnt every time must be the most good food. As long as he accepts and wants it as food...   So go in to him several times a day, with food.  Preferably at the same time, they will feel safer with a predictable schedule.

But perhaps you have in there dry food all the time for him, so you must come with the goodies?

I wonder if it may be idea to play it dirty, and you come with all the food...  Not nice, Im revolting to the idea, but may be best after all.   Have this in mind.

You had got a lot of good advices from the others, I will mention some of my usual advices - most of them probably already mentioned.

Talk a lot to him in a friendly, low voice. You can sing some.   Mothers talk to their kittens, and friendly toms court to the females with sounds...Often surprising lotsa different sounds

Dont look straight into the eyes... its hostile for cats. Home cats are used to this, of course.

Look on the ears, or a little aside.

You can also semi-close the eyes sometimes, or yawn a little.

If you dare to go on all fours, strech yours hands forward, you backward...  And vice versa.

All three like friendly cats do.   (cats yawning and stretching is not because they are lazy, sleepy or just wakened - it is for greeting a friend; - another cat or their human).

Classical harp music is good.  Any soft, calming music is good, but harp is best, our experienced LDG tells.

A Feliway diffuser may be useful.   IS usually useful, but not necessary: most fosterers manage without.  Besides, its not cheap.  You can get it a little cheaper on postorder, feks from Amazon or Ebay, but still not cheap.

Good luck!   *vibes*

StefanZ,  Yes someone mentioned that feliway deffuser, so I ordered one online today.  Hoping it helps!  And yes, I will try your tips, yawning and stretching, anything that might help!!!  .

I think I've had a small breakthrough with Tiger!!  I've taken all the advice that everyone has given me and put it into action. And believe me, getting up and down from the floor isn't a very easy thing for me to do, but he is worth it!  But anyway....I was laying on the floor about 2 feet from him trying to play with him with one of those fishing pole toys with a long fury thing hanging on it and he started playing!!  Not a lot but he played! And then he started bathing himself in front of me, showing his underbelly while bathing!  Then he walked up to the bowl of special food I brought for him and ate the whole bowl!  To me thats a break through!  Am I reading to much into it or is this truly a break through?  I can't wait to hear from some of you!  Thanks for all your good ideas!

YAAAAYYYYY!

You're right, that's definitely a breakthrough. :nod:

Just keep going, and it should get easier. Eventually you won't have to lie down with him anymore. If it helps you could try one of those low lawn chairs when you start sitting up. I would try sitting in the next day or two.

Keep up the good work, and he should start coming around.

That is a wonderful breakthrough! Showing you his belly! Wow!

Thank you for your kind words about my group. I would love to compare notes on our progress. Every little step forward is so exciting.

Yes, I agree, He isnt so anxious and stressed any more, had began to relax.

It should go on better and better now.   Learning dont works well if you are very stressed, not the deep learning. That phase is over now.  

Good luck!    *vibes*

It's the small victories that really count in this process. Excellent news about Tiger grooming in front of you..... And then eating :happy3:. Very good sign. Now things will move a bit quicker for you and Tiger. There may be setbacks so don't get disappointed ..... Just keep on with your gentle patience and you will win his heart forever :heart3: :rub:

             .   TIGER LET ME PET HIM TO DAY!!!!!!!!!     I was napping with him, slowly moving my hand closer and closer to him.  He finally touched it again with claws open then started licking it!  I slowly stretched out my fingers to scratch him and he let me!  For about 5 or 10 minutes I scratched and petted his head, and he acted luck he was drunk with effection!!  But then all of a sudden he got up and walked away. It was like someone hit a switch.  I was so shocked I had stopped talking to him while all this was going on, then I softly started talking and I think maybe that was the switch.  What do you think?  Do you think I'll be able to really make friends with him?  I really, really need to get everyones thoughts on this!!   Thanks  everyone!  Can't wait to hear from you all!!   Your new cat friend.......Cathy

Cathy - YOU HAVE MADE FRIENDS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :heart3: :lol3: Cat's will be cat's . When they have had enough - they will walk away.... don't let that bother you. AND he could have heard something that you did not and that called to his attention. This was an amazing cuddle session and I see many more of those to come. Great job with Tiger :heart3: