Trouble introducing rescued stray to our established cats

This is bit of a long read, but it would be awesome if someone advised me with this problem.

A few months ago I rescued a stray cat that lived behind my workplace. A coworker had been feeding her for the past year, but couldn't take her home so I volunteered. We think that Stray Cat had been abused in the past because she shies away from people who loom over her, feet, and especially men. (No men live in my house, so that's not a problem.) I took Stray Cat home and shut her in my mom's room and bathroom. We got her checked out at the vet's office and it turns out that she's around 2.5 years old and has already been spayed, so she definitely has previous owners at some point. She's a very intelligent and sweet cat: she's learned her new name already and simple commands like "up," "down," and "no," and once she got used to us, she adopted the habit of flopping down and purring when we would come into her room. When she's with most people, she acts just like a regular friendly kitty.

This isn't the case with our two established cats. (Let's call them Big Cat and Little Cat.) Big Cat is about 5 or 6 years old and she's the alpha cat. Little Cat (also female) is 2.5 years old: around the same age as Stray Cat. We followed the recommended course of action for introducing cats: two weeks of no interaction but switching the towels they sleep on so they get used to each others smells. After that, we let the cats sniff and hiss at each other from underneath the door to my mom's room. Next, we shut Big Cat and Little Cat in our rec room with glass doors and let Stray Cat explore the house for a few hours every day. This way they could look at each other with no physical contact and Stray Cat could rub all over the furniture and do regular cat things. This integration has been going on for about 3 months, and we are now trying to introduce them face-to-face. That's where the problems lie.

Normally when Stray Cat and one of our other cats interact between a door, glass or not, we either get a staredown or some hissing. That's fine; cats do that. A couple of times, Little Cat escaped the rec room and got a beatdown for her trouble. We are trying to let Big and Stray Cat interact one-on-one as the next step. Big Cat sets an example for Little Cat, and LC follows it. (This has been the way since we brought LC home as an 8-week-old kitten.) The plan of action is this: Big Cat and Stray Cat get used to each other; Little Cat is more likely to follow suit and accept Stray Cat. It's foolproof! Nope.

Normally, Big Cat sits in one spot and Stray Cat comes into the room, gets intimidated and slinks out, then comes back a few minutes later to repeat this process. It would be fine if this was all they did, but when big Cat and Stray Cat fight there's a lot of problems. For today's example, they ripped out bits of each others fur and SC chased BC around the house until BC his under my bed and SC was shut back in my mom's room. Both cats were fine physically as always, but Big Cat was hostile after this and did the hiss/ growl routine to Little Cat and I, which was very concerning because she is normally chill and friendly. It took her a while to calm down. This is the first time that this has happened after one of their fights and I want some advice on this face-to-face thing. (It should be noted that the majority of the time, Stray Cat stays in my mom's room and is only let out when both cats are shut in the rec room with glass doors. It is only recently that we started letting Big Cat and Stray Cat our at the same time.)

Am I going about this face-to-face introduction all wrong? Should I be letting all three cats out at once? What can I do to minimize the fighting that goes on? I don't think that waiting three months to let them interact in person was unreasonable, but what do you other cat owners think? If someone has had a similar situation, I would love to hear your experiences. I really love Stray Cat, and I would really hate to have to give her away because she and the other cats don't get along.

TL;DR version: I got a new stray cat and I am trying to introduce her to our two other cats. This isn't going well, and I am wondering if I need a new strategy.

Thanks in advance to anyone who offers advice!

Aw, how sweet of you to rescue this baby! Since she's happy in your mom's room, for now, I wouldn't worry about having to give her away. I live in an RV with 8 cats - space isn't the issue, interaction is. :lol3:

Sounds like you've done everything right. Sometimes there are just cats that take a while, and you've shown enormous patience! :rub: In our experience, our females tend to be pissy about new introductions. One in particular, Spooky, took longer and longer with each new introduction. (All of our cats are rescues - we rehomed the easy ones and kept the issue-kitties, so rehoming wasn't an option). The first one took six months, the second one took about a year - and the last one took over two years for her to stop hissing when just seeing him.

But it seems a new strategy is in order here.

OK. Here's my suggestions. Rather than just having them "get used" to each other's scents, forget actual interaction for a little while again. For a couple of weeks, focus on getting BC and LC to associate things they LOVE with SC's scent. Rub SC all over with a number of clean rags or wash cloths (preferable if not washed with scented soap or dried with scented softener or sheets). Put these under their food dishes. Play with them - and when done, put their favorite treats out on rags that smell like SC. You can do the same for SC with their scents. :nod: If they all like catnip - let them rub and drool over catnip toys, then exchange them. Give BC and LC catnip toys SC drooled and rubbed all over. (Same for SC). If they like being brushed - brush SC with their favorite brush. Let them smell it, then brush them with it. :nod: Etc.

Next - if you can, consider feeding them at the same time, but move where you're feeding them. You've got the rec room with the glass doors, right? Feed them there, with SC in the rec room. But get an end table or something - a folding card table - just something so that BC can be "up" when eating - higher than SC. And if you let them free feed kibble, then I suggest introducing a "wet meal" "treat" just so you can do this. Let BC eat where she can see SC - and she's physically higher than SC. :nod: (Height is a hierarchy thing).

After a week or two of this, rather than letting SC out of her safe space, bring BC into SC's space (your mom's room) WHILE SC is there. But do NOT focus on the introduction at ALL. In fact - if in the intervening two weeks you can establish a set play time, very routine, even better. When it's this play time, bring BC into SC's room, and play with her in there. No more than five minutes or so. If she DOES focus on the wand toy, praise her constantly, and do your best to just ignore SC. If five or so minutes goes well, put treats down for her, and give a few to SC, then take BC out of the room.

Gradually lengthen the play time... and just play it by ear from there.

Where I'm going with this is... do what you can to get them associating each other with things they love. Reinforce BC's place in the hierarchy. Then help BC understand that SC means "PARTY TIME" (playing in her room) - and BC gets ALL the attention, and praise, and rewards.... so SC just means MORE of all kinds of good things for BC. :nod:

It's our natural instinct to "protect" the newbie... but I think focusing on BC during those re-designed interactions may help calm things down when you decide to test the waters when you let SC begin to "invade" BC's and LC's space. And when you get to that point, I'd do it with food, not locking up BC and LC while SC checks things out. I'd start with that meal where BC eats "up" on something - feed them in the same place - just with SC being on the same side of the rec room glass for the meal (but on the floor, not "up" with BC). And again - focus on BC, and praise the heck out of her for eating and ignoring SC. :nod: And make only that one meal, at first, be the time they spend in the same space outside of SC's safe room. When THAT is going well, maybe try a play session with BC during your now "routine" play time, but let SC out to watch - or explore things - while BC is distracted with the play time.

Hope these will help!

First, BC getting angry at you and LC her being upset is quite normal.  Just let her cool down. 

Second, I got the impression SC tries to fight with BC for the primate, for being the alpha cat...

It is usually easier if the newbe accepts she is lower ranking than the residents...

(it is perhaps the drawback of the long, scientifical introductions, and perhaps also of long quarantine periods - the newbe is feeling it is her home too, and you are her Momma, and thus - doesnt see any reason to be submissive and to please herself in with the residents...   )

So.  Look through LDG´s excellent advices.   And in next introduction try support BC as the alpha cat. Make also her be sure SHE is your master cat and deeply loved by you, more than ever. So she doesnt have any reason she must fight the newcomer down. 

As I understand it, LDG was also in on this though.

Good luck!