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Hard day

post #1 of 17
Thread Starter 
Today was a hard day for me. My father died 3 years ago today. I dreamed about him this afternoon when Amber and I took a nap. I wish he could have seen her. I told hubby it was a depressing day for me because of this. He just doesn't get it...didn't even give me a hug. But that's okay. Maybe he just didn't know what to say or do to make me feel better. Anyway, at least I didn't have to work today, that would have been even worse because I didn't feel like being around people. I miss my dad so much.
post #2 of 17
Debby I'm so sorry for your loss and that you're still feeling it so strongly. But it is to be expected. Let me tell you though, that I believe your dad does see Amber. He's probably watching over her. I believe we are not finished when we pass to the other side. Ever watch John Edward? I love him. He communicates with people on the other side. And he says when you dream of a loved one, they are coming to you and are there. It may sound fruit loopy but there's been a lot of evidence. Even if it wasn't true, It gives us something to hang on to. Bless you dear.
post #3 of 17
Debby I am so sorry for the loss of your Dad. I can understand(I think) what you are feeling. It has been touch and go with my Dad these last few days. I really think that you Dad watches over you, your husband and Amber every day. Sending HUGS to you from GA.

post #4 of 17
Debby I agree that our loved ones stay near us after they pass as well. I am sorry for your sadness, but your Dad was a special guy so of course you miss him! Consider yourself hugged from this household, even if you can't feel it- our warmth is around you this day.
post #5 of 17
Originally posted by Debby
...didn't even give me a hug.
Since he didn't give you a hug, I will!.
I'm sorry that you're feeling blue, but you have a good reason to. It's so hard to lose someone so close, but I'm sure it's even harder since you & your Dad had such a strong bond. For some crazy reason I've been thinking a lot lately about how I would react if I lost one or both of my parents. Dad and I don't always get along very good, but it would be so hard to lose him. My Mom and I are so close...we each others best friend, so I think it would kill me if I lost her. I know those days will come, but I wish it wouldn't. Death just scares me for some reason. Unfortunately it's something that none of us can avoid.
post #6 of 17
I'm so sorry
post #7 of 17
Debby dearest, hugs coming from me as well. It's only natural to miss your dad - and three years is not a long time either. I'm sure he sees Amber and with time you may see him in Amber as well - maybe you already do?
post #8 of 17
Aw, Debby, (((((HUGS)))))!!!!!!!!!!!!

I am blessed to have both my parents still alive.

I do know how you feel though, because I was very close to my mom's Dad. He was a farmer - he raised chickens and sheep (by the time I was spending time on the farm). We lived in Illinois, and he lived in Pennsylvania - but I always looked forward to my summers on the farm. I spent every August there. I was the last of his 13 grandchildren, and I was the only one interested in the animals.

I used to write him a letter at the beginning of every month when I wasn't there. I did this for years and years and years, no matter where in the world I was.

He died... in 1990, I think it was. So 13 years ago. I still think "Oh - I've got to write a letter to Grandpa!" each month. (I still do, even though there's nowhere to mail it).

If I still miss my Grandpa after 13 years, I'm sure you still miss and grieve for you dad. I'm sure he is with you and that he does see Amber.



post #9 of 17
Thread Starter 
Thank you guys for being there for me...it really meant alot. It IS hard to lose someone you love so much and are so close to...but I agree with you all...I will see him someday again. He was a good man...the best. I will never hold a candle to the man he was...that is to say...I will never come close to being the kind of person he was. People in the community still talk about him with great respect. He was a great person... and a devoted Christian..he would give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. He would drive miles and miles out of his way every Sunday morning to pick up children to take to Sunday School. There is a song by Ray Boltz (a Gospel singer) called "Thank You" that when I first heard it...a few years before dad had his stroke and died, I got chills, because I just knew it was about my dad...it could have been written just for him!!!!!! It is one of the most moving songs you could ever hear....about a man who dies and goes to heaven and there is a man there who comes up to him and says Thank you....for taking me to Sunday School, etc....you would have to hear it....it sent chills up my spine the first time I heard it....and then the weirdest thing happened....I had never told anyone how much that song reminded me of dad, or how it had affected me...but after he died, my nephew said he wanted to sing a song at his grandpas funeral....and guess which song it was???!!!!!!!

And so the song was sang at my father's funeral.
post #10 of 17
Thread Starter 
If anyone has a way of looking up that song on the internet and listening to it...it would mean alot to me in memory of my father.
post #11 of 17
Here are the words to the song Debby. As I mentioned on here before I lost my father to cancer when I was 16. Even after all this time, I still have days that are hard knowing he isn't with me. But deal with the grief in some way Debby, otherwise it will eat you up inside.

((( Hugs )))

Thank You
(Words and Music by Ray Boltz)

I dreamed I went to heaven
and You were there with me
We walked upon the streets of gold
Beside the crystal sea.

We heard the angels singing
Then someone called your name.
You turned and saw this young man
And he was smiling as he came.

And he said, "Friend you may not know me now"
And then he said, "But wait"
You used to teach my Sunday School
When I was only eight.

And every week you would say a prayer
Before the class would start.
And one day when you said that prayer
I asked Jesus in my heart."

Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed.
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave.

Then another man stood before you
And said, "Remember the time
A missionary came to your church
And his pictures made you cry.

You didn't have much money
But you gave it anyway.
Jesus took the gift you gave
And that's why I am here today."

Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed.
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave.

One by one they came
Far as the eye could see
Each life somehow touched
By your generosity.

Little things that you had done
Sacrifices made.
Unnoticed on the earth
In heaven now proclaimed.

And I know up in heaven
You're not supposed to cry.
But I am almost sure
There were tears in your eyes.

As Jesus took your hand
And you stood before the Lord.
He said, "My child look around you.
Great is your reward."

(Chorus twice)
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed.
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave.

Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am a life that was changed.
Thank you for giving to the Lord
I am so glad you gave.
post #12 of 17
Debby ((((((((((((((((((HUGS))))))))))))))))))))))
My father died 8 years ago,I still miss him everyday.my brother 19 years ago And I still miss him also.I belive they are with us everyday.
post #13 of 17
Thread Starter 
OMG Kass!!! Thank you for posting that!!! I just bawled reading it! It is even more dramatic with the music to it. I am also so very sorry that you lost your father at such a young age...I am lucky to have had my father until I was 34. Thank you Kass. I have dealt with the grief but it is still really hard on the anniversary of his death.

And Sherral...I am so sorry about you father and brother. I have never lost a brother...it must be very hard.

Hugs to you all.
post #14 of 17
Having lost both parents and just recently my grandpa, I can honestly say I do know exactly how you feel.

There will always be days when we need an extra hug or two.

Here's one from me to you.. (((hug)))

I will definately look that song up and listen to it. Thanks for posting the words Kass!
post #15 of 17

My dad died 14 years ago.
I still miss him. . . and do occasionally dream about him - don't be upset about it. . . cherish it!

I agree with mzjazz2u in that he is still with you. . . and Amber. . . and that he came to you in your dream. . . as spirits often do to comfort you.

I am also a fan of John Edward. . . even if others of you out there think it's all fake. . . I went to see one of his shows live. . . it was awesome. I've also read all his books.

My son was only 8 months old when my dad passed. When he was little (around 4 or 5) he could communicate with him . . . he still remembers. . . says that "Pepere" used to talk to him, but he says he can no longer do this.

My sisters & children and I went to a local Medium's Day a few years back . . . the Medium who read my son mentioned how he used to talk to my dad!

Another medium with the gift to draw the spirits coming through drew a portrait of a man that looks very much like my father. . . and she did this on two separate occassions (one for me . . . one for my sister) several months apart. She did not know us. . . was not even from our state. She also said many things that were true of my dad. . . even nailed the kind of car he drove!

And the song that came out the month I lost my dad was "The Living Years" . . . I still think of him whenever the song comes on the radio.

post #16 of 17
Thread Starter 
Thank you Ghyslaine...and hugs back to you!!! I have lost all my grandparents as well as my parents too.. all with in the space of 12 years. and Laurie...I love that song you mentioned too!! It is very neat that your father and son could communicate for awhile!
post #17 of 17
Oh Debby! I'm sorry to hear about your loss.

It's always so hard when we loose loved ones.

Here's one super (((HUG))) for you.

Love Samantha
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