This is a long story, sorry, but hopefully someone can give me advice.
So we previously had three cats: a white male, a black female, and a grey male. All indoors, all fixed, all got along fine. All went in the litter box every time. We also would foster 1-3 other cats at any given time. Our cats were used to new friends coming and going and did not get upset or pee outside the littler box when newcomers would show up, and our foster cats almost never went outside the litter box either (sometimes the first day they came they would, or if they were kittens who were sick). Everyone was surprisingly chill about the whole arrangement and we had more than 80 cats come and go over the course of a couple years.
In the spring, we moved cross country and stopped fostering. The kitties adjusted seemingly well to the new house and everyone was getting along much as they had before. After a few months, tragedy struck. Our black female, always skittish and fearful and with no outside experience managed to escape through a faulty window screen. She disappeared. We scoured the neighborhood, put up flyers, checked the shelter religiously, and put out a trap every night, since we knew she would be way too scared to come to any humans. For two an a half months there was not a sign of her. After that time we adopted a calico kitten we had seen at the shelter while checking for our black female, as our grey cat and white cat didn't get along without the black one as intermediary and the grey cat was lonely and crying all the time.
The new kitten and the grey cat hit it off and played happily together. The white cat tolerated it (he's always been very grumpy and doesn't really play or like to be played with). However, as Murphy's Law dictates, shortly after we got the kitten, our black cat was showed up in our back yard! Nearly starved to death, but alive and surprisingly healthy otherwise. We managed to catch her with tuna in the trap and took her to the vet and started nursing her back to health. At first everything was fine, although of course she was even more skittish than she had been.
But the grey cat, who had actually been raised by this one since a kitten, now HATES her. Something must have changed about her smell or the way she cowers, but he seriously has it out for her and she just runs and hides. The kitten, who is now a teenager, learned from him and also began to persecute the black one (although I think she thinks she's playing some, but she plays too rough). The black one won't stand up for herself at all. It was bad but manageable until we went on vacation.
Once we were gone, things deteriorated. The black one began peeing and pooping under the futon because she was too scared to come out, and the cat sitter ended up having to separate her from the others, and basically the house was in chaos. Now that we are back, things haven't gotten better. We've tried disciplining the other cats (with a spray bottle or a timeout in another room) when they go after the black one, and we've tried taking her in the bedroom with us at night so they can't attack her when we aren't there (we are both home all day so we can generally break up anything that happens while we're awake). But the other cats aren't getting the message and the black gets more and more scared. Also when they go for her and I break it up either physically or with water, she gets more scared than the ones I'm trying to discipline and runs and hides again. And when she's hiding and they go after her, it's hard for me to break it up since I don't fit in small spaces, until the damage is done.
Two nights ago, she peed on our bed even though she was in there alone, seemed relaxed, and there was a littler box. After serious laundry (pee went through a duvet, down comforter, two sheets, and a mattress topper) I banned all cats from the bedroom. Of course the next night someone must have cornered her under the desk while we were sleeping because she peed under the desk and on our wireless modem. We had to get a new modem, pay for the old one, and it disrupted our whole work days since we both need the internet to do our jobs.
I just am not sure how to handle this. IT's been weeks now with sporadic peeing and the black cat just terrified all the time. I know we haven't been very consistent with them, but I'm just not sure what the best tactic is. I've tried establishing her as dominant by bringing her into a room or on to the couch and making the other cats leave. I've tried spritzing and time outs when they are bad. I've tried letting her hide and making her come out. I've tried putting her on the couch with the grey cat or calico when both are calm and giving everyone treats and pets to build her confidence. They've been separated in various ways at various times to let everyone calm down, but we can't live like that and I can't deal with the peeing. We rent!
Any help would be appreciated muchly. Thank you!
