About personal space

yayi

TCS Member
Thread starter
Veteran
Joined
Oct 9, 2003
Messages
12,110
Purraise
91
Location
W/ the best cats
The other day while lining up to pay at the supermarket, the lady in front of me placed her basket on the floor about a foot away from a man in front of her. All of a sudden the guy started kicking her basket away from him. When asked why, he said the basket was too close and it could trip him. Is this about "personal space" or the fellow was just being obnoxious? The man was on the obese side and tall. 
 

natalie_ca

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 2, 2006
Messages
21,136
Purraise
223
Location
Winnipeg, Manitoba, Canada
Likely about personal space and the fear of stepping backwards and falling over the basket. 

And are you sure he was "kicking" the basket, or simply pushing it away with his foot?  "Kicking" is a hostile term indicative of aggressive behaviour.

Think about it. A foot (12") is not a great distance. When you take a step, that distance is usually more than 12".  If that basket was behind him and he happened to step back, he would bang into the basket. He could simply hit his foot, or possibly lose his balance entirely.

In addition to that, being on the larger size (speaking from personal experience), his line of vision to the ground is obscured by his girth, adding another risk. His personal space is larger than that of someone who is thin and can see all the way around and to the ground without obstruction.

I find that so many people these days have no respect for personal space.  Standing a foot away from someone in line isn't going to get you through the checkout or to the bank machine, any sooner than if you stood 2 feet away.
 

cr4zyc4tl4dy

TCS Member
Adult Cat
Joined
Nov 5, 2011
Messages
109
Purraise
12
Location
SK, Canada
Likely about personal space and the fear of stepping backwards and falling over the basket. 

And are you sure he was "kicking" the basket, or simply pushing it away with his foot?  "Kicking" is a hostile term indicative of aggressive behaviour.

Think about it. A foot (12") is not a great distance. When you take a step, that distance is usually more than 12".  If that basket was behind him and he happened to step back, he would bang into the basket. He could simply hit his foot, or possibly lose his balance entirely.

In addition to that, being on the larger size (speaking from personal experience), his line of vision to the ground is obscured by his girth, adding another risk. His personal space is larger than that of someone who is thin and can see all the way around and to the ground without obstruction.

I find that so many people these days have no respect for personal space.  Standing a foot away from someone in line isn't going to get you through the checkout or to the bank machine, any sooner than if you stood 2 feet away.

 

pushylady

TCS Member
Veteran
Joined
Jul 26, 2005
Messages
16,398
Purraise
451
Location
Canada
If he was actually kicking it away, then that's an obnoxious reaction. Especially as it's behind him, not in front. Was he planning on walking backwards through the line? I think he over-reacted.
For my personal comfort level, a foot is quite close to be standing in line, but I know this is different for everyone.
 

swampwitch

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 30, 2006
Messages
7,753
Purraise
158
Location
Tall Trees & Cold Seas Vancouver Island
If I were the guy in that situation I would have moved the basket away, too, not kicking it hard but definitely pushing it farther away. I have poor peripheral vision up and down (it's okay side to side) and I've tripped over a few carelessly placed shopping baskets and boxes on the floor of stores! I just can't see the floor in front of me if I'm looking straight ahead. Maybe he's tripped over a few, too, no matter what the reason putting a basket on the floor that close to someone is inviting an accident.
 
Last edited:

momto3boys

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Mar 8, 2011
Messages
1,822
Purraise
18
Location
New Brunswick, Canada
I think he over reacted......seriously, it's not that big of deal and like it was already said....he's not going to be walking backwards through the line.
 

Draco

NOT Malfoy!
Veteran
Joined
Apr 26, 2011
Messages
8,721
Purraise
2,780
Location
LawnGuyLand, NY
I absolutely HATE it when people are within a foot of me, behind me in line. I step back on accident and I step on them or their baskets, hurt myself or they get angry for bumping into them. There's absolutely NO reason for people to be so close behind me in line (Especially when they reek of cigs or other foul smell).. it's not going to make the line go any faster! I have pushed baskets and/or carts back away from me when it's too close (never kick or shove, but pushed it back and with an "Excuse me" to those close to me)

So the guy probably felt the same way as I do.
 

sk_pacer

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Jul 27, 2009
Messages
2,458
Purraise
18
Location
The seat of a John Deere tractor
People should not park a basket, or themselves for that matter, that close to another person in line. Often, people do take a step backwards, whether to take a closer look at a magazine, grab a pop or to move the cart to remove an unwieldy package from the cart, or just to shift the empty cart; if you nose the cart to the belt/rurntable, you have to back up more than one step to get the cart out of there. Nothing quite like backing up into a cart, basket or human - any of the options get the other person upset that you got in their way. Common sense says stay back at least two feet.
 
  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #9

yayi

TCS Member
Thread starter
Veteran
Joined
Oct 9, 2003
Messages
12,110
Purraise
91
Location
W/ the best cats
Thank you very much! 


I agree with all of you but had to ask because the fellow was really kicking the basket. I think that's a bit rude. A gentle push would have been enough. The woman probably would have ended apologizing to the guy even.
 
Last edited:

krazy kat2

TCS Member
Top Cat
Joined
Sep 14, 2001
Messages
8,085
Purraise
41
Location
Somewhere in Georgia
I am very adamant about my personal space from someone I don't know. If they get too close behind me in line, I will step backward on their feet, if they push their cart into me, I will push it back.  I can see no reason to crowd someone when there is plenty of room, It is just rude, so I will be rude right back, even though I try not to be a rude person in any other situation. If it is someone I know and like, they can hang on me like a a cheap suit.
 

resqchick

TCS Member
Super Cat
Joined
Oct 23, 2006
Messages
1,080
Purraise
14
Location
Chasing Da Bird...
I think he probably could have used some manners, but then she could have used some as well. I HATE when people get too close to me, especially when there is no reason for it. It is one of the reasons I don't ever do Black Friday shopping. Odds are, I'm going to get into it with someone pushing and shoving, and it's probably going to end badly, so I don't bother. Saving a dollar on walmart underwear isn't worth a misdemeanor on my record. LOL!!!
 

Winchester

In the kitchen with my cookies
Veteran
Joined
Aug 28, 2009
Messages
29,730
Purraise
28,023
Location
In the kitchen
I have a "thing" about personal space, too, so placing the basket right behind me would have made me a tad nervous, simply because I'd worry about backing into it and losing my balance.  The guy didn't have to kick the basket, though; all he had to do was ask the woman to move it and explain that he didn't want to back into the basket, esp since he was a large man. That's what I would have done.

The kicking? Yes, that was rude and obnoxious. There are other ways of dealing with things. But maybe he was in a bad mood or something already. Not that it excuses him.
 
Top