Fluffy Ratbag at Halloween

Pumpkin Horror

Fluffy Ratbag watched in sick fascination, his eyes wide, his stare unblinking. There on the kitchen table was the scariest sight heâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]d ever seen. It was large. It was round. And, most of all, it was orange. Very large, very round and very, very orange. But this wasnâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t what had captured Fluffy Ratbagâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s attention, unable to tear his gaze free. A large, round, orange ball was unusual but not, of itself, scary. But this - this large, round, orange ball with itâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s crooked smile, that triangular, empty nose and those blank, staring eyes; this was scary.

But what was even scarier was what the Skinny Man was doing to it. His arm dipped in and out and each time the arm withdrew, it deposited a spoonful of pale yellow slime and goo onto the growing mound on the plate beside him.

Fluffy Ratbag crept forward and sniffed the plate. A curious, earthy smell filled his nostrils. Cautiously, he sniffed the large, orange ball and then, resting his forepaws on the lip of the large round hole, he watched in horror as the Skinny Man continued his excavations.

Finally, he could take no more. He jumped down from the table and dashed through to the living room. The Cat Who Lives Behind The Mirror ran up to greet him, looking as anxious and flustered as Fluffy Ratbag himself.

“Ohmigod, thatâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s sick†Fluffy Ratbag blurted out “You wouldnâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t believe what theyâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]re doing in there.â€

The Cat Who Lives Behind The Mirror waited silently, breathing in time with Fluffy Ratbag.

“And they say weâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]re cruel when we play with a mouse but that, thatâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s just….sick. Theyâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]ve….theyâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]ve killed it. And cut it. And now….â€

He paused. The Cat Who Lives Behind The Mirrorâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s face mirrored Fluffy Ratbagâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s horror.

“And now….theyâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]re scooping itâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s brains out!â€

Been reading Peanuts cartoons lately?

Originally Posted by mrblanche

Been reading Peanuts cartoons lately?

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Not for years....don't tell me Schulz already did this? Aaaaargh!

Originally Posted by FluffyRatbag

Not for years....don't tell me Schulz already did this? Aaaaargh!

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None the less, i enjoyed the read.

We watched The Great Pumpkin last week.

And yeah- the scene with Linus screaming "Aaarrrggh! You killed it" to Lucy keeps going through my head

Very cute read though.

Cheryl

As an apology for the unintended plagiarism, here's Part II....

A pale silvery moon cast an ethereal glow across the sleeping countryside. A deep frost sat brittle upon the fields and the woods and all was quiet and still. No sounds, save a slight hissing of wind through the birch twigs, as the broom swept across the hills and farms and valleys.

The witch was in a rush and the wart on her nose was telling her she was late. She bent lower over the broomstick and urged it on, ever faster. Down the broomstick flew until it was skimming the very tops of the trees and hedges. The witch threw her head back and cackled into the night.

Her familiar, Midnight, bright golden eyes screwed against the wind, clung to the twigs behind her and moved easily on the broom as it slalomed between the trees of a small copse. The Witch eased back slightly on the broomstick as they approached a small village and circled slowly, looking for somewhere to land. Eventually, she settled in a dense patch of shadow outside a small terrace of houses. Not a light was showing as the broomstick silently glided to a halt hovering a few feet above the ground. The witch stepped down and whispered quietly to the coal-black cat on the back of the broomstick.

“Wait here, Midnight. I wonâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]t be a minuteâ€

With a rustle of skirts and not a sound on the gravel path, she disappeared around the corner of the terrace. Midnight sat for a moment and then stood to stretch his legs and arch his back extravagantly.

“Oi. Who are you? Wotchew doinâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]? Whoâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s the old witch? Er, got any Food?â€

The voice from the shadows startled Midnight and as he turned to locate the newcomer, he lost his footing, slipped from the broomstick and saw stars.

Fluffy Ratbag crept forward cautiously, sniffing at the inert figure. The intruder was breathing steadily but obviously out cold. Fluffy Ratbag prodded him with a paw, smelt him – like old books – shrugged and turned his attention to the broomstick.

“Wonder if they got any Food on that thingâ€

With a graceful bound, Fluffy Ratbag leapt up to the floating broomstick, falling short but just managing to latch a paw into the twigs before hauling himself up, panting and breathless. He wobbled dangerously as the broomstick bobbed up and down with his movement.

He was about to start ruffling through the twigs at the back of the broomstick when the witch came round the corner of the building, adjusting her skirts.

“Ooh, thatâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s better. This cold air goes straight to my kidneysâ€

With that, and before Fluffy Ratbag could open his mouth, they were airborne.

“What the fu-…â€

Fluffy Ratbag clung for dear life onto the twigs as the broomstick shot into the night air, sweeping in a graceful arc over the sleeping village.

Five minutes later – five of the most terrifying minutes of Fluffy Ratbagâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s short life – they landed outside an old, run-down cottage. The witch dismounted and headed for the front door.

“Put the broom away Midnight, I got things to get on withâ€

Gingerly, and then with a thud, Fluffy Ratbag slipped down from the broomstick and hugged the ground with relief. His fur was blown in all directions and he lay there for a few minutes gathering himself and counting his remaining lives.

“Get in here and help me†came a brittle voice from the cottage.

Fluffy Ratbag looked about him. There was no-one else around. She must have been talking to him. With a shrug, he entered the cottage – at least it was warm in there.

The witch was bent over something on the ancient kitchen table. A black cauldron bubbled over a roaring fire in the hearth and an unpleasant smell permeated the cottage. Warming through and recovering from his journey, Fluffy Ratbag started to explore.

“Where are the bat wings?†muttered the witch, rummaging through the piles of ingredients scattered around her. “And the frogâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s eyes? I must have frogâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s eyes.†Jars were upended, boxes thrown aside in disgust as she got more and more irate. Eventually, her eyes lit upon a small black and white cat sat innocently on the kitchen bench. A small, webbed foot stuck out of the corner of his mouth.

“Who are you? Whereâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s my Midnight? And what have you done with my ingredients? Eh? Speak up. Whereâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s my toad?â€

The mouth remained closed but the webbed foot disappeared into it with quiet schlup.

“Whok koag?†enquired Fluffy Ratbag innocently.

A moment later, the cottage door slammed and Fluffy Ratbag found himself staring at it from the outside. He raised a paw.

Inside, the witch threw down her spell book and stomped across the kitchen, flinging the door wide open.

“Well?â€

A small black and white figure sat in front of her, his head tilted slightly as he looked up at her dark, forbidding figure.

“Er, trick or treat?â€

Too cute!! Poor Fluffy! At least he found some comfort with the cat that lives behind the mirror, hehe

Oh, I love these! Keep them coming!!!

calico2222 said:

Oh, I love these! Keep them coming!!!

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Thank you for your kind words (coughs modestly). At the risk of self-promotion, I has writted a book which is advertised in the Marketplace bit of these forums (well, it is if the Skinny Man pulled his finger out and actually posted it there as I asked him.). I will be dictating more of my Pearls of Wisdom to said Skinny Man and putting them here to try them out prior to sticking them in the next book so I hope that they continue to entertain.

Must go now as I have a gunky ear which is swollen up and horrid and I need to go rub it on the Skinny Man. They say that abcess makes the heart grow fonder but from the dry retching sounds that came from him last night when he looked at it, I'd say the opposite is true in this case.

Honestly, what a wuss.....