Getting Married. Where?

Now, this will sound very strange to you, I know, but hubby and self need to get married by September. Israel has some very strange marriage laws. For Jewish citizens of Israel, only Orthodox marriages are recognized by the state of Israel. Most people comply and marry that way, even if they are totally secular, even atheists just to avoid problems. Hubby and me refused to follow the norm. As we are not Orthodox, we didn't wish to have an Orthodox wedding and declared a civil marriage. That is fine with everyone around us and everyone we know accepts us as married, but the autorities don't.

Now for the real strange law. The state of Israel does recognize any kind of marriage as legal if it is held outside of Israel. It doesn't have to be a religious marriage. Even a Vegas express wedding is more legal than a formal wedding carried out by a non-Orthodox rabbi in Israel! It's very annoying, as it means that in order to stick to our principles and have a legal status of a married couple, we need to have a marriage carried outside of Israel.

Now, for income tax purposes, we decided to go through with the overseas marriage as well (how romantic... ) and the question is where?

The most reasonable place is Cyprus. It's less than an hour's flight and you can get married within days. It's the most popular wedding destination in Israel (we're not the only ones with principles ). That also means that it's not cheap. They know that thousands of Israeli couples need them for marriage purposes every year so they charge around 350$ for the marriage license alone! They also require all sorts of legal documents that need to be translated into English and approved at the cost of an extra 100$ or so. And then there's the price of flights and hotels.

Italy is another nearby option and I'm looking into that as well.

The US is actually another popular marriage destination for Israelis. I don't think I'd want to fly so far away with this pregnancy of mine. It seems too risky. But I am looking into that option as well, as it would give us a chance to see the US together and have a nice "honeymoon" before we have kids.

Any recommendations anyone? What are the prices and requirements for a marriage license where you live?

Anne-
I truly admire you for sticking to your guns on this one. The good thing is that there is about to be a price war on airline flights in the US. I don't know if this will affect you or not but they are about to become very cheap from what I've heard. All we had to do is apply for a marriage certificate in that state (ours was TN and no blood test or anything was required). Then, within that 30 days we had to be married. The person who performs the ceremony will sign as will two witnesses. Then you mail it off and get an "official" one. I don't even remember there being a fee. If there was, it wasn't very much. We had our honeymoon in New Orleans which was awesome. It just depends on what you would like to do! Do you want to be secluded and alone or party? I have to say it was very uncomplicated.

Anne, how come you have until Septmember to get married? Is that when BABY is due?

Italy sounds like a very nice place! My hubby and I got married in Las Vegas. I don't remember how much it was to get the license....it wasn't expensive at all. The wedding, itself, cost around $1000. (which included video of wedding, pictures, my flowers, and some other stuff that I can't think of at the moment). We got marrie at the New York Hotel/Casino. It was very nice, actually! And, our honeymoon was in San Diego, which was very nice! We stayed on the beach, which was even cooler!

My license was $70 in 1999. No blood test. I think I needed to present a birth certificate, but I don't reember if that was for the license itself or if that was for changing my last name on my identification and voter registration.

How about a nice small country wedding in Vermont?
Oh listen to me...like you could just drive (oops - fly) here on a whim!
Marriages do not cost a lot here - it is the divorce that is a killer!
Good luck on your decision.
Whatever you decide, I am sure you will pick a spot!

Thanks for all the info!

If all goes well, the baby is due on the end of January... a long way to go. It's the IRS - they want us to be officially married and recognized by the home office before the last quarter of the tax year (which is Jan-Dec here). That means getting everything finished by the end of September. With my pregnancy going the way it is, I don't see myself going anywhere in the very near few weeks. So it'll have to be the second half of August or the beginning of September. I've been thinking a lot about it today and I'm pretty sure I don't want to do any trans-atlantic flights with this pregnancy. I want to be within a few hours reach of a hospital at any time. A flight to the US means I can't even lie down if something goes wrong, for 12 hours or so... So, I think common sense dictates somewhere nearer to home with a shorter flight. Cyprus seems good for that, only they charge so much for the marriage licence! I hate getting ripped off and they're doing it only because they know so many Israelis need them for that I'll keep looking into the south of Italy maybe. I don't think it's more than a 2 hours flight from here.

Take a look at these wedding destinations...




Doesn't Italy look romantic? We are already married so I wasn't looking forward to this whole business, but now I'm thinking we can actually make this into something romantic

Dearest Anne,

Wow! I hope you can get this done really soon. I know the stress of a wedding is enough to drive ya crazy. The states are all about the same when it comes to rules and regulations...all ya need is a Birth Certificate and perhaps another form of ID...a couple of witnesses and that's it. Really cheap. I hear that the flights here weren't so bad either and that could mean a multitude of different things you could plan for a honeymoon....
However; if I were you...I'd stick to Italy...I've never been, but I heard it's so romantic. Let us know your decision

God Bless You All!

Love,

The pics look fantastic. I think you have the right attitude. You might as well make it a romantic exciting adventure. I think it could be a great trip. All the best to you an hubby.

Anne; I did not realize that Israel was that close to Italy!

Geography was never one of my good subjects. . . . .I will have to go to some maps and learn more. Italy does sound like a good location. I have to agree with you; I hate the thought of Cyprus riping you off because they know that a "need" exhists!

Also, let me add something here; unless you and Alpha are both citizens (naturalized or otherwise) of the U.S. there is a waiting period (not sure how long--used to be 90 days) before you can be married anywhere over here except in an Orthodox Jewish Temple(because of a relationship they have with Israel) and that would defeat your original purpose. . . . .

Also, check into the fact that an "at risk pregnancy" may be grounds for you to be granted an extension to the old deadline. If you can get a doctor to state that any form of flight(even 1 hr. to Cyprus)puts your baby at risk.

My prayers are with you.

Anne,

Italy is the most romantic city in the world. I was there when I was 15 and have wanted to go back ever since. Of course, back in those days (33 years ago) it cost $375 for 10 days including air fare, hotel, meals and tours. St. Peter's Basilica and the Sistine Chapel are SO beautiful! If I were to re-marry anywhere in the world, that's the place I'd choose. Good luck on your quest.

Donna

Italy sounds like a great choice! I went around 10 years ago and loved it. There are some even smaller beautiful islands you can get to from Venice by a 30 minute boat ride. Good luck and let us know what you decide!!!

Anne:

I'm with you all the way on that decision not to do a trans-Atlantic trip with the pregnancy being as it is. Italy looks fabulous! Speaking from the American standpoint, I'd love to have a wedding or honeymoon somewhere as glorious as that! Don't get me wrong, the US has some very beautiful places, but nothing seems to compare to the "Old World" charm of Europe. I think that riding in a gondola in Venice just has the "It's a Small World" boat ride of Disney World beat hands down!

Vegas is easy. You can get your marriage certificate the same day that you want to get married. The Bureau is opened until midnight. There are plenty of packages for trips to Vegas and getting married is pretty cheap also. I think the marriage certificate is $25. US dollars. Besides, if you get married here, my husband and I can stand up for you if you would like. What a excuse for a party (and a new dress). Let me know if I can help. This all would depend on what your doctor says about flying. Keep us all posted please.

Frannie

Oh Anne....now I am worried about you again!!!! The damn (excuse my language) IRS.... should have no say whatsoever about when and where you get married!!!!!!!!!!

Please let us know how you are doing and how everything goes!!!!

:laughing::laughing::laughing::laughing: Deb you're too funny!! :LOL: :LOL:

Anne, I hope you're getting enough input on this! I can't wait to hear your decision!

By the way...how's your sister? Did she get married to the man she met online??? I'm so curious because of my situation! It's so exciting!!!!

Love &

Oh, Frannie! That is so nice of you to offer!

But I think we will stick with either the Cyprus or the Italy option. Most probably Cyprus, as it's the shortest flight time (less than an hour). August is too hot to see much anyway and there are too many tourists everywhere. We'll just be off for a quick "wedding" in city hall and that's it.

TLK, I don't think the IRS cares much about my pregnancy. They would just tell me to get married here with an Orthodox rabbi or just lose the tax benefits for this year. Debby, they are not telling me not to do in the sense that I can lose the tax benefits and keep my current status. Life's not simple over here...

As for my little sister, she's too young to get married, she's just turned 18. But they are moving in together real soon! They're still very very happy together and there's certainly marriage potential there! My brother is getting married this August. He's getting married to a Christian woman, so he also can't (and won't) have an Orthodox wedding. They're flying away to the UK to get married. It makes a lot of sense though, cause the bride is British and that way her side of the family gets to attend the wedding.

Anne - I hope you get this figured out soon. What a hassle to deal with when you're already worried about the baby. Please take care of yourself during all of this. That said, this might be a great way for you and your husband to renew your vows to each other and make it into something special. I'd love to get my husband to do that with me. Let us know what you decide!

Cypress sounds great. I would love to go to Greece. Actually I'd love to go to Italy too.

I know you'll keep us posted, but make sure to take lots of photos at the event also and post them! I am very happy for you!

Just thought I'd update you. We decided on Cyprus after all, as it is the shortest flight and I don't want to take too many risks with the pregnancy.

We'll be flying out on August 13 and back on the 15th. So, this will be a very short and focused holiday I think that Cyprus is probably too hot this time of year to do any serious touring. It'll cost us about 550$ each, but that includes the marriage lisence which is about 350$, so it comes down to aprx. 430$ for flight and accomodation. We did pick a five star hotel mind you