What is best for this cat?

Hey Everyone!

This is my first post because I am trying to figure out what is best for this amazing feral cat that I've fallen in love with!! I've also never had cats before... we always had dogs growing up because my mom is allergic to cats. Now that I'm an adult, it doesn't matter, but I've still never had one.

I moved to Hawaii five months ago and there are tons of feral cats here due to warm weather, no predators, and so on. There are a lot of them that are in the resort where we live and three in particular have adopted us. I've started buying cat food in bulk and they come inside and eat every day. (Side note: yes they were all already spayed/neutered before we even got here, they have had their ears clipped which is what they do in Hawaii to show they have done this.)

There's Penguin, who is definitely the scardey cat of the bunch. She gets freaked out if you even look at her. She comes in to eat but doesn't linger.

Then there's Tiger, who was cautious at first but now he's warmed up to us and is mostly lovable and sweet and likes to be petted and scratched behind the ear, but he can still be a little jumpy at times.

And finally, there's Mowsie (so named because she doesn't meow, she squeaks like a mouse) and she's by far my favorite. She was wary in the beginning, but she quickly warmed up to us and is the most affectionate cat I've ever met. She's more like a dog in a cat's body because she constantly wants affection and love and she LOVES to play. She constantly plays with the toys I bought for her.

I think all three of them might be brother/sisters because they are the same size and have a few similar markings (though all different colors.) They spend all their time together when Mowsie isn't with us.

She has pretty much decided that she is my cat because she spends 95% of her time in the house now. We still don't have a litterbox but it doesn't matter because she's like a dog... she only goes outside. And she lets us know when she wants to go out (which is next to never.) I work from home and she comes in the house and sleeps next to me all day or plays with toys. And then at night she sleeps at the foot of our bed!!!

I have come to completely *adore* this little cat. I love all three of them, but I don't think Penguin is ever going to come around, and though Tiger is friendly and hangs out in the house sometimes he's definitely not like Mowsie.

If we were planning on living here for a long time it would make everything easy. However, the company who moved us here is now talking about having us move to Florida (probably not anytime soon, but it's still something to consider) and I don't know what to do.

I mean if we leave the cats here they should be fine, they survived without us before and they're constantly catching geckos and people who come here on vacation feed them (but then they are gone after a week.)

I wish I could just keep all three of them but I know my boyfriend will not be okay with that, plus moving three cats on a plane is not fun and Penguin is basically still feral. What I really want to do is keep Mowsie (and bf is okay with this.) I am pretty sure that she would want to go with us because she spends all her time with me anyway over her buddies, but I just feel so bad separating them!!! If they are brother/sisters I don't want to take her away from them. But on the other hand, I would feel ten times WORSE abandoning her after all this.

So you see my dilemma!!! I am completely devoted to caring for this cat, but my question is... is keeping her the best thing for HER?

I mean I would be taking her from an environment where there are no cars and no predators to a place where there's plenty of both. She probably wouldn't complain about being an indoor cat because she almost never goes outside anymore anyway by her own choice. But I wouldn't want to deny her from going outside either unless I had to.

I just don't know what to do!!!

Feedback, thoughts, suggestions... anything!? Thank you so much in advance for reading my super long post and replying!!!

xoxo
-Tien

First of all, welcome to TCS!

And awwww..... It sounds to me like you've been adopted, and I think it's great you want to take her with you!!!!!

We had a similar dilemna with the first cat that adopted us. She turned out to be a stray, but had been on her own so long she'd reverted to being feral. She definitely did not want to be inside full time, and we live in a safe place for her to roam. We got involved with rescuing cats, and brought our first kitties indoor only... and then it looked like we had to move. We didn't know what to do about Booger.

We ended up decided that the best thing for her was not to leave her here on her own. Yes, it's territory she knows... but she wasn't thriving on her own, and she clearly liked being with people. So we worked with a rescue group to find her a home where she could be inside/outside. And we flew her cross country to do this.

Some cats transition to being indoor only just fine. In fact - if you move and take her with you, she'd need to be confined inside for at least a month (or more) to make the territory "hers" before you could let her outside anyway.

So what I'd do is buy two litter boxes (she's not used to peeing and pooping in the same place), take some of whatever the natural cover is outside (here it's dirt, so we put dirt over the top of the litter when litter box training feral kitties), put it over the top of the litter - and see what happens if you confine her inside for a few days. How does she react?

Thank you for the response!!! That makes me feel a lot better. I get the feeling that Mowsie would rather go with us than stay here, I just wanted a few more opinions!!

Thanks for the tip on the litter box. That makes me wonder... I've hear about people training their cats to go in the toilet, which would be awesome!! No litter box to clean up and contend with. But it seems like in order to do that you would have to move the litterbox into the bathroom and do stages from that... but how would you go about training a cat to go in the toilet who usually goes outside?? lol. Does anyone have any thoughts?

Welcome to the site . I definitely think Mowsie WANTS to have a home. If she is that friendly, loving and affectionate towards you, then by all means take her inside!! She will thrive. I had one feral six month kitten last December that on the night of her trapping, she actually reached to touch my hand with her paw when I put food in the cage . She became quickly the most affectionate cat I had ever known. She now has a wonderful, indoor only home and couldn't be happier. Mowsie does want to come with you and I think would be heartbroken if you left..... I would start now . You are already well ahead of the socializing game as she is already socialized to you . Please don't try the toilet training . You first have to get her used to a regular, large and open litter box. Maybe way down the road, you could try to teach her the toilet. I really don't think many people have much luck with that at all and end up having cats pee all over their houses. Stick to the litter box. That is a natural instinct for cats to cover their business with dirt and sand...... Much luck to you . And thanks for caring for feral cats

Thank you so much for your response!! You're making me feel a lot better. I get the feeling she wants to be with me but it's always easy to second guess yourself when you just want to make sure you're doing the best thing for the cat. But I would feel awful if I had to leave her.

I have another question for you guys, along the same line... I was talking to my boyfriend about turning her into an indoor cat and he got really upset and said it's cruel and there's no way we're going to turn her into an indoor cat, we'll just have to take the risk. But that worries me. Of course he said, "how would you like it if you never got to see the light of day?" which I totally understand and agree with, I want to let her outside, but I just worry about predators and cars... living here her whole life she has had neither and I don't know how wary should would be. What are your guys' thoughts?

As a matter of fact, we've been discussing this very issue. Please read through this! It'll help you make an informed decision, whatever you decide.

Indoor v.s. Indoor/Outdoor Domestic Cats

Thank you!! This might be good for bf and I to read together...

I agree to taking her along on the move. I have 2 outside cats(only cats who had outside privileges get them at my house). IMO if you have a cat outside have the money and vets phone numbers in case something goes wrong.

I would worry about a cat who grew up in such calm scene going to a house with alot of noise/cars though in you situation, if the sun is the only factor I would think of building a enclosure at the new place.

Since Mowsie is already so extremely friendly, it is likely she was once an indoor cat . So her adjustment should be quite easy. You can bring the outdoors indoors in such a way as making cat tree perches, lots of window viewing, playtime each day with her, you can even grow some cat grass. It is not cruel to keep her indoors safe and sound. I have a feeling she would like that very much. If you do move, I would not advise ever letting her back outside as she might get confused in a new place and look for her old territory. If you do decide to take her as an indoor only cat, I would keep her as a indoor only pet for the rest of her life. Good luck with your decision!!! She sounds like a real sweetie