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My Mom died this morning - Page 2

post #31 of 54
I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm sorry that it was such a shock to you too, it's so cruel that you weren't kept in the loop about her deterioration.
post #32 of 54
I'm so sorry for your loss.
post #33 of 54
Thread Starter 
Thank you, everyone, for your kind words. It's been a rough day. It started out with that terrible, 6AM phone call--"Your Mom is dying; if you want to say goodbye, you must come to the hospital now; she will not last an hour..."

Death brings out the kindness and nastiness in people, I've just learned: everyone here, and my friends, have been so kind; but I had 2 incidents today on the phone that made my blood boil. Three hours after Mom died, I got a phone call. Normally, I screen them (phone sellers abound here), but I was expecting personal calls, so I just answered it. It was a woman, who I thought was from the hospital or funeral home or something, so, when she asked how I was doing, I mentioned that my Mom died 3 hours before. The woman was actually collecting for a charity:"Oh, I am sorry to hear that. Well, anyway, I just want to tell you that we're having a collection event on June...blah blah blah." I said, "My Mom just DIED 3 hours ago! I can't deal with this now!!!" And she was still blabbering on when I hung up on her.

The second rotten jerk was, believe it or not, the funeral home. My brother called to tell me that I needed to call them to give permission for Mom to be cremated tomorrow. "Hi, I'm Marge, and my Mom died this morning, and your funeral home is handling the arrangments, and.." (I was interrupted here.) "Your name?" "Your phone number?", as if I was ordering a pizza over the phone--no compassion, nothing. She just snapped questions at me, then put me onto the funeral director--who had a pleasant tone, but no, "I'm sorry for your loss"--nothing. I swear, the guy who delivered our pizza tonight actually registered more of a sympathetic response than these morons! What part of "My Mom died today" don't people understand?

The above people make me even more glad that I have all of my friends on the Cat Site. Thanks again for being there.
post #34 of 54
I'm so sorry that the day was made even harder by a couple of jerks. That was so totally out of line.

Double hugs for you today, tomorrow, and for as long as you need.

Cally
post #35 of 54
I'm so sorry to hear the sad news of your mom's passing. Lung cancer just sucks. My dad died 2 years ago from it, and I won't get into the story of all that happened, but it was long and horrible.

I hope you get more kindness than coldness/nastiness in the days to come, and don't hesitate to ask for support and virtual hugs here.
post #36 of 54
I'm so sorry
post #37 of 54
I'm sorry to hear this
post #38 of 54
I'm so sorry... I can't even imagine the pain of your loss, especially so unexpected, and aggravated by a lack of peace in the family anyway, it sounds like (that is something I can understand).

We are all thinking of you. May you in time find comfort from the memories you have of your mother.
post #39 of 54
Quote:
Originally Posted by MargeCat View Post

Death brings out the kindness and nastiness in people, I've just learned.
Thanks again for being there.
This will happen a lot, at least in my experience. Things like "it will get better" made me mad. It won't get better, I lost my best friend, the person who loved me the most, my biggest fan, the best person I ever knew, it doesn't magically "get better".
I am sorry this happened, for your loss, and for all the people who don't understand, they are lucky they don't understand the depth of pain. I figure they mean well and don't mean to be mean, insult you, or hurt your feelings when you are already down.
post #40 of 54
Very sorry to hear this. Hang in there
post #41 of 54
wow so sorry
post #42 of 54
Hun, I am so very sorry. You are in my thoughts and prayers.
post #43 of 54
I am so very sorry. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family. I couldn't imagine losing my mother and hope I never have to for many, many more years.
post #44 of 54
I am so sorry. My prayers are with you and your family.
post #45 of 54
I'm so sorry.
post #46 of 54
Marge, i'm so sorry for your loss. It's going to take time to sink in, but take it one day at a time
post #47 of 54
Oh hun,I am so,so sorry about this,it really doesn't help when people are so unsympathetic.Please take care,thinking of you.xxx
post #48 of 54
I'm so very sorry for this sudden loss...sending lots of prayers and thoughts to you at this difficult time.
post #49 of 54
I've come to the conclusion that unless someone has lost a loved one who meant the world to them, they just don't understand the depth of another person's pain. When I lost my Dad, I was amazed that other people could look at me and not see the waves of grief washing over me. I remember thinking "Wh can't they see how much I'm suffering? My Dad just died!"

Don't let a couple of insensitive jerks get to you, hon. You and your family are in my thougts and prayers.
post #50 of 54
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Sorry too that there are jerks in this world who make matters worse with their lack of consideration. But never mind them -- they don't count. Just be gentle with yourself, and know that your friends hold you in tender thought. Peace.
post #51 of 54
ah, MargeCat, I am so sorry for your loss. Losing your Mom is one of the most difficult and saddest things you can ever go through.

Take care of yourself.
post #52 of 54
Quote:
Originally Posted by rapunzel47 View Post
I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. Sorry too that there are jerks in this world who make matters worse with their lack of consideration. But never mind them -- they don't count. Just be gentle with yourself, and know that your friends hold you in tender thought. Peace.
I have lost both my parents. It so horrible hard My thoughts are with you
post #53 of 54
I am so sorry for your loss. It hurts so much to lose a parent. Those who have not faced that yet don't understand the pain. I pray that in time your memories will be sweet. Take one day at a time. You are in my prayers during this time of mourning.
post #54 of 54
I am so sorry for your loss. Losing a parent is so hard. *hugs*
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