Worried sick about a recently adopted foster cat

I'm so worried about my foster cat that I just don't know what to do. I don't think I'm going to be able to sleep tonight over this. Hopefully I'm overreacting.

This boy, AJ, has been with me since he was a kitten and was adopted last Thursday by a nice young family that seemed very excited to adopt him. They emailed me on Friday night telling me that he was doing fine and warming up to them. I emailed them back on Saturday and asked them a few questions but I didn't hear back. Before they adopted him they responded to emails very quickly. I waited and sent them a second email late Monday night and not it's Wednesday night and I still haven't heard back. So I decided to call them and dialed their home number. The number had been turned off. I called their cell phone and it went directly to voice mail. I haven't called them before so I don't know how long their home phone has been turned off.
I'm getting so nervous that something is wrong. Why wouldn't they respond to me? My fear is that AJ has got out of the house and they are afraid to talk to me. If that's the case he's been gone for days now. I just feel like crying. I just can't figure out why they wouldn't respond to my emails.

If I haven't heard from them by tomorrow afternoon I'm driving up there. Please pray for AJ that he's okay and safe and sound.

Oh no! Hopefully he's alright.

About the phone - our home phone was cut off a few months ago because of apartment 12b (we're apartment 12, 12b used to be 13 but they figured it wasn't renting because of the number ). They hadn't paid their bill and the phone company turned ours off by mistake. I didn't even notice until a week after because we use our cellphones so much. Maybe something similar happened to them?

Or maybe now since they actually have the cat they don't see the point in responding as fast or they don't check their email as much. I found that happen quite a bit with my foster dogs when I was working in rescue.

I know how worried you must be. I sure hope all is well with AJ.

What a worry this must be for you.

May I offer a different perspective on how the new family may be feeling?

Some people just don't like/enjoy keeping in contact with people after they've done what they needed to do with that person. I know it sounds harsh - but in today's world where everything is rush, rush, rush & me, me, me they simply may just not be interested in keeping in contact with you anymore.

If I'm really being truthful, I'd probably be annoyed if a previous foster parent of my new cat had started asking me questions, then reaching out again a few days later. Maybe they emailed you to tell you he was settling to put you at ease, but wanted to stop the communication there? That's what I would have done - tried to reassure the past foster parent, and then that would be my way of severing the relationship.

My fingers are crossed that everything is OK with AJ. But, I'd try not to get too upset over it. I'm sure when these people have an issue, they'll be emailing you frantically every second, totally disregarding the worry they put you through by not responding to your emails But for now, they may just want to settle in with their new cat and adjust. People can be very territorial and defensive. They may see your questions and follow up emails as feeling they aren't capable. It could be a number of things, but I wouldn't automatically assume something terrible has happened.

Please keep us posted, though.

I can understand if they don't want to have contact with me but I don't understand why they can't drop me a line to let me know if he's still terrified and what his new name is. I've had him for a year and a half since he was a tiny baby and I just want to know that he's okay and is not still sitting under the dresser shaking like he was when I dropped him off. We talked about this when I dropped him off, that I would really appreciate if they would let me know how things goes in the beginning and I never got the idea that they had an issue with that. Had they just responded to my first email, which I think is common courtesy, I certainly would not have contacted them again. When they didn't respond to me I was afraid that he had got out and maybe they were embarrassed to tell me. I don't see why they would be annoyed. All they had to do is write me one sentence after I asked a couple of general questions when I responded to their email. I don't think it's out of line to expect that at all. Just ignoring someone is rude. I've done many adoptions and have never run into this issue. All I expected was for them to respond to one email. I only started to contact them several times after they failed to do that for three days.
I'm the foster parent and the adoption coordinator and all adopters sign a contract agreeing to being checked on so we can ensure the cat's welfare. That's explained to them before adoption.

I finally did manage to get in touch with them today though. I friended the girl on Facebook and she responded to that. She says that AJ is doing fine and I can just hope that's the truth.

I'm so happy that AJ is OK!

And you are right - it is common courtesy, and I'm sorry you went through such an ordeal just to get someone to give you a simple response.

I think people (myself included - but am now learning better since joining the forum) underestimate the bond between foster parents and the cats that they care for.

I hope AJ is coming out of his shell, or in his case, out from under the dresser and enjoying his new home.

I finally chatted with the adopter on Facebook and even got some pictures so now I'm feeling much better. He really looks happy in the pictures and he sounds like he's doing great. I even got a picture of AJ with their 3-year old who he was really scared of at first. Now he sleeps on her bed. Go figure!
It's good to know that he isn't lost out on the street, hit by a car or some other horrible fate that I've been imagining. I'm really silly like that. If my husband comes home a half hour late I'm sure he's laying in a ditch somewhere.

I'm always really happy when one of my fosters get adopted but it is bittersweet. Especially like with AJ who's been with me for so long. After a year and a half they're like one of my own and I always worry that they are afraid or unhappy after I leave them, just like I am if I have to leave one of my own guys somewhere. But now that I know that he's no longer terrified and seems happy I feel much better about the situation.

Being a foster meowmy myself, I understand the worry when our foster kitties go to into a new home!!!! Glad to hear that AJ is doing well and being cared for and loved like he deserves

I'm so glad this story had a happy ending and it's good that you will be able to see updates, etc on Facebook

So happy everything and everyone's OK.

I'm glad that AJ is happy in his new home