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Crying and shaking, all the time.

post #1 of 4
4/12/11 at 8:56am
Thread Starter 
Hello,

I rescued a cat from what I am reasonably sure was an abusive situation. Sudden movements cause the cat to react as if he was about to be hit, he cried whenever I would pick him up, etc. We had made a lot of progress, and he was allowing us to pick him up, and was always very affectionate.

My problem comes from last night. Norv (that's his name) scratched me for some reason while I was sleeping. In a sleepy haze, I knocked him off the bed, he fell, ran under the bed, and started meowing. I (being able to sleep through anything) went back to sleep.

When I awoke, little Norv was on the window sill, so I went to pick him up to give him his food and a little extra love for last night. He cried, started shaking, and squirming to get out. I carried him out to the kitchen, put his food down, and he refused to eat. He crawled over to a wall and curled up in a ball next to it. I walked away, and he made a mad dash back towards the bedroom until he saw me in the hallway, and then he froze.

Every time I pick him up he cries and shakes.

What do I do?
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post #2 of 4
4/12/11 at 10:25am
How long have you had him?

Some cats are very wary of people. It doesn't have to be because they have been abused. He may just be naturally shy.

With a shy cat I find it best to never force your attentions on them. Always let them come to you in their own time. People are very big creatures compared to a cat. When you want to interact with him, get down on the floor. Even lay down so that you are not looming over him. Coax him to come to you using treats or toys. It may take some patience but hopefully he will learn that you aren't as scary as you seem and will come to you willingly. When you try to pet him don't stick your hand towards his face. Approach him from the side. It's less intimidating.

Hope this helps!
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post #3 of 4
4/12/11 at 10:39am
What Mschar said - if there's a nice long novel or textbook you want to read, now's the time to merely sit on the floor, reading softly to yourself - and let kitty come to you. Maybe leave some favorite treats near you, but not too close. Maybe play with a little wand toy, just sort of back and forth on the floor - see if he's interested, but don't push it.

Try not to stare at him. When you're not home, think about leaving some soft classical or new age-y type music on, very low, just to have some noise in the house.

If you do hold out a hand, I've read it's good to make your hand a soft fist - sort of the size of a cat's head, and just hold it steady, let them come to sniff you.

Also, don't push the carrying too much right now. He might be afraid you're going to drop him, like he fell last night. Unless you think he's in pain from the fall - then you need to see the vet. Has he eaten? And used the litter box?

I know it always seems like one step forward and two steps back, but you're a hero to be patient with this little guy...if he did come from an abusive home, he may have had a flashback and needs to overcome that bad memory again. Good luck.
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post #4 of 4
4/12/11 at 10:41am
Bless you for taking in an abused cat. Sounds just like my cat, Marilia. At the shelter, you could pick her up, but she would just grab hold of you, nails and all so tight, would never look at you and huddle when put back in kennel. She hid completely for 2 months-ish, only coming out at night to eat, drink and poo/pee.
She fought with all of my cats, she was so afraid.

So, with that being said with your beloved Norv, he can get through all of this and learn to trust again as long as the love given him is consistent ... always. Not one exception. Accidents will happen (like knocking him off the bed in your sleep. I think I do that all the time having 10 cats and instead of sleeping on their beds, they sleep on top of me, around me, block me in and my bad back makes it impossible to move certain ways.

I made it a point (although this is how I am with all my cats) to

1. Never... ever punish. (All I use is Cesar Milan's "Tschhhh!!" thing which works on all the cats when they are in a dangerous place, or start a scuffle - takes a short time for them to get used to that.

2. Always talking to this cat in lower tones (there are times you'll laugh loud or make loud noises, we all do), but overall, make a point to talk to this cat, like Norv is human; have conversations with him. I did this with Marilia - over time she actually worked hard to gain the trust of the other cats after trying to beat them all up, and she did it. Slowly.

-They were afraid of being around her because she was so terrified and totally jumped everyone, now, today, she is friends with ALL cats, sleeps next to me on the bed and purrs constantly, is a beautiful lady! She still jumps at noises (I believe she has PTSD like me)

3. Let her sniff you before trying to pick Norv up. Using the palm-down method. Palm-up indicates a slap or hit, but palm-down is less threatening to them.

I'm sure there's more I'm forgetting, but this is a start. Treat all cats equal if you have more than one. Very important. Just talk to Norv more, and in the friendly, but easy-going lower register. Slowly-but-slowly you will see the change.

Please feel free to write if you have any other questions. I know I forgot some things.

Give Norv a gentle "Hey gentle boy" from me!

AND WELCOME TO THE CAT SITE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! :-D

Warmly,

Julie O'






Quote:
Originally Posted by streampowered View Post
Hello,

I rescued a cat from what I am reasonably sure was an abusive situation. Sudden movements cause the cat to react as if he was about to be hit, he cried whenever I would pick him up, etc. We had made a lot of progress, and he was allowing us to pick him up, and was always very affectionate.

My problem comes from last night. Norv (that's his name) scratched me for some reason while I was sleeping. In a sleepy haze, I knocked him off the bed, he fell, ran under the bed, and started meowing. I (being able to sleep through anything) went back to sleep.

When I awoke, little Norv was on the window sill, so I went to pick him up to give him his food and a little extra love for last night. He cried, started shaking, and squirming to get out. I carried him out to the kitchen, put his food down, and he refused to eat. He crawled over to a wall and curled up in a ball next to it. I walked away, and he made a mad dash back towards the bedroom until he saw me in the hallway, and then he froze.

Every time I pick him up he cries and shakes.

What do I do?
Reply
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