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Any tips on how to keep from crying?

post #1 of 27
3/26/11 at 3:21pm
Thread Starter 
Some of you may remember that my oldest sister Linda is seriously ill. Our other sister is getting married tomorrow in Houston where Linda lives so she can attend the wedding (other sister and her fiance live 2000 miles from Houston). I am giving a speech & toast at the reception from both Linda and I to our sister and her new husband.

It's only six sentences long and I have been practicing it over and over and have it memorized. Although I can (finally) get through it now without crying (it's pretty sentimental), my sisters and I are very close, and if one of us cries, the others follow suit immediately.

How am I going to get through this speech without crying? I will be speaking to my sister and her new husband and I KNOW she's going to be crying.

Any tips? Should I put a tack in my shoe? Any advice is appreciated!
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post #2 of 27
3/26/11 at 4:06pm
Just be yourself and if you cry, you cry! It isn't wrong to show emotion, not even when doing a speech.
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post #3 of 27
3/26/11 at 4:20pm
Just be yourself. It is okay if you cry.
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post #4 of 27
3/26/11 at 4:31pm
I agree---let the tears flow if they come. Just take a big breath and speak from your heart. You'll be great.

Congratulations to your family and hugs to Linda!
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post #5 of 27
3/26/11 at 5:05pm
I agree with the rest. Just keep a supply of hankies or tissues handy.
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post #6 of 27
3/26/11 at 5:13pm
Focus my friend.... I know is very hard when the feelings came but you can do it!
FOCUS!...
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post #7 of 27
3/26/11 at 5:19pm
I'm with the others. Don't worry about crying, just make sure you have some tissue.

Congrats on the marriage! I hope you're all enjoying the time together and having something so wonderful to celebrate! We've missed you around here.
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post #8 of 27
3/26/11 at 7:06pm
Thread Starter 
Thanks, guys! I feel if I were speaking for myself, I would be okay, but Linda is not doing so well. She is too weak to speak at the reception so I have to be strong for the both of us and whenever I think of that my heart breaks.

And our mother will be there and she's always considered crying a sign of weakness. A few tears would be okay I just don't want to start blubbering.

p.s. I've missed you too, Laurie.
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post #9 of 27
3/26/11 at 7:11pm
I have to chime in and agree with the others; crying is a natural thing (especially at weddings) and it sounds like these 6 lines are 6 lines of very touching words that I think will mean even more if spoken from your heart, not trying to block out the emotion of it.

I can see you are very kind and considerate; blessings to you and your sisters and family!

Warmly,

Julie O'

Quote:
Originally Posted by SwampWitch View Post
Thanks, guys! I feel if I were speaking for myself, I would be okay, but Linda is not doing so well. She is too weak to speak at the reception so I have to be strong for the both of us and whenever I think of that my heart breaks.

And our mother will be there and she's always considered crying a sign of weakness. A few tears would be okay I just don't want to start blubbering.

p.s. I've missed you too, Laurie.
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post #10 of 27
3/26/11 at 7:12pm
Just be yourself
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post #11 of 27
3/26/11 at 10:06pm
I wish I could help. But I am such a wimp sometimes seeing a total stranger cry makes me weepy.

All I can say is stay strong and good luck with the speech.
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post #12 of 27
3/27/11 at 1:15am
I agree with the others - emotion is no bad thing. But....having said that, I understand where you are coming from that, while showing emotion, you would like to get through giving this speech without crying or being unable to continue because you're trying to stop from crying.

When hubby and I renewed our vows last year, I was worried that emotion would get the better of me and I wouldn't be able to say the words. I did a bit of research online and a tip that I came across on various wedding forums that had a lot of support was to press your tongue against the roof of your mouth if you found yourself getting emotional. I tried it and it worked - at least to the point where I was able to compose myself and could carry on!

Hope it works for you.

Whatever happens though, this will be a special occasion and I hope it goes well for all of you
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post #13 of 27
3/27/11 at 5:30am
I just want to give you a and say I agree with everyone else. Nothing wrong with crying doll, it just means that everything you are saying is completely from the heart.
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post #14 of 27
3/27/11 at 8:05am
I think it would be impossible for me not to cry in your situation!!! Just have some tissues on hand and let your emotions flow as they may. Have a wonderful time with your family and your sisters
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post #15 of 27
3/27/11 at 8:52am
Thread Starter 
Thanks for the support, it really helps! Busy day today but I'll let you know how it goes (might not be until I'm at SFO tomorrow morning).
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post #16 of 27
3/27/11 at 9:44am
First of all it's ok to cry, just let it out even if you start to sob. After letting out your tears the words will come easier for you even tho you start to cry often, it's ok to show your emotions and it will make you feel better.

I don't remember if you saw Cher at Sonny's funeral service, she was a speaker and she cried often. She said before she started, "I am going to cry while speaking so please just bear with me." If you want, you can warn the guests that you may break down, they will understand. Just remember, it's ok to cry.
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post #17 of 27
3/27/11 at 4:27pm
I'm with the rest, Cat. Just be yourself, and if it happens, it happens. A little self-deprecating chuckle, and "I knew this would happen!" goes a long way to easing the moment, too. Hope it goes well.
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post #18 of 27
3/27/11 at 8:13pm
I didn't expect an update today, but popped into TCS and just wanted to say I was thinking about you and your sisters today!
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post #19 of 27
3/28/11 at 5:29am
Just wanted to give you a big !
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post #20 of 27
3/28/11 at 8:48pm
Thread Starter 
I didn't sob! My eyes got a little watery but that was it! My sisters were crying, though, ha the suckers, can't they control their emotions?

Seriously, thank you all, I was ready to accept it if I cried and to stick my tongue on the roof of my mouth. Our mother was being pretty yucky which made me mad and that helped, too, and let's not underrate the glass of champagne I had. (Just one glass beforehand - didn't want to end up on YouTube under "drunken matron-of-honor speeches.")

I'm home after getting 10 hours of sleep the last 3 nights so sorry if I'm not making a lot of sense.
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post #21 of 27
3/28/11 at 10:29pm
Sweetie, I'm late to this, but I'm so happy to hear it turned out well for you. It must have been very hard, especially with your mother there, but I'm sure it meant the world to your sisters.
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post #22 of 27
3/28/11 at 11:18pm
Well done, what a special time (minus your mom being yucky that is). Hope you can get some rest.
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post #23 of 27
3/29/11 at 1:11pm
You're making plenty of sense, Cat, and I'm delighted to hear that it went well for you -- yucky Mother notwithstanding. Now sleep and be refreshed.
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post #24 of 27
3/29/11 at 4:34pm
I am glad it went well for you. now for some much deserved rest
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post #25 of 27
3/30/11 at 10:54am
Quote:
Originally Posted by rapunzel47 View Post
You're making plenty of sense, Cat, and I'm delighted to hear that it went well for you -- yucky Mother notwithstanding. Now sleep and be refreshed.
Exactly!
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post #26 of 27
3/30/11 at 2:51pm
I'm so pleased to hear that it went well - now for some well-earned sleep, I should think you're mentally exhausted too.

I'm sure it was a day that your sisters will both treasure
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post #27 of 27
3/30/11 at 4:19pm
So glad it went well. Though I will miss not seeing a YouTube Video. Now that you mentioned it, I want to see one!!!
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