Are we going to be able to keep him?:(

Welcome to TCS. Hope we can help.

Do you have a larger room that he can make his "home" for a while as he settles in? A guest bedroom? An Office? A den? A large bathroom? A room where the other animals can be kept out and there won't be much human traffic?

Cats are very territorial, and when bringing a new cat home, it's always best to give them just one room to "make their own" before introducing them to the rest of the house or other animals in your home. It's called the "safe room," and it's a place to give kitty whatever time he needs to adjust to his new family - the new smells, sounds, people animals....

It should be safe for cats and have places for him to hide while he can watch you. Right now, he's really scared. He just needs some time to get over it, and then worry about introducing him to the other cats, the kids, and the rest of the house.

Obviously he should have everything he needs in there, and for the first few days - play it by ear, but guage everything based on how he's doing and reacting - do as much as you can on a schedule. Clean his litter box at the same times every day, clean his water dish, feed him his food, and/or fill up his kibble dish at the same times. Routine will REALLY help him settle in.

Because he's been rather traumatized, it'd also be best if you could spend a little time in there NOT trying to interact with him. Let him watch you, and just give him a little time to understand he CAN trust you. Read out loud, talk gently to him, sing, knit, fold laundry... whatever. And if you can do it sitting on the floor, even better LOL.

Whenever you get up, leave treats behind for him where you were sitting.

You may also want to get a t-shirt really good and sweaty, and put it under his food dish. This will help him quickly associate you with "good" things.

Do leave some toys in there for him. And if he does like to play, after a day or two if he's over the hissing and growling, bring a wand toy with you and initially move it slowly so as not to startle him if he's still edgy... and if he's interested, begin introducing some play sessions. This will really help reduce his stress.

If you can afford it, I would definitely invest in Feliway. The plug-in would be best for him, but they are expensive, and the spray will help. Just ignore the directions, and apply it every day, at least for now.

Give him a nite light, and maybe leave a radio in there turned way down low but tuned to a classical station.

He just needs a little time to settle in, to have some space he can make "his," and start over.

I agree with what was said before me.

I've got 3 cats. Sneaky (10) and Holly (1) have been together for about a year. When we brought Holly home as a kitten, I didn't really separate the two of them at all, Sneaky immediatly put Holly in her "place". They aren't best freinds- but they tolerate.

Well- a month ago my next door neighbor asked me to take her SIL's cat. Jasper. Long story- but short version is- they moved SIL here- SIL had an apartment that couldn't take cats. Didn't want to take him to the shelter b/c more than likely he would have been PTS b/c he's 10 and that would have hurt SIL. A LOT.

And yeah- call me really mean but I really did NOT want this cat. Because I'm already the sole caretaker of the 1st two (and Holly won't go out). And now Jasper can't go out either b/c he was declawed. Oh gee- another litter box to take care of and a cat to clean up after. BY MYSELF. And I have a husband and 2 teenaged kids who are MORE than capable of taking care of a cat. So I kind of had "attitude" too.

So we brought him over and let him out. BAD IDEA. He hid- Sneaky hissed at him and Holly was just a royal terror. So- we put him and his crate in the garage- and let HIM come out when he wanted to.

It's been a month and he's a whole lot better. He used to hide under the couch when inside- now he sleeps on it. The girls are still kind of a pain. Holly seems to be 'warming up" to him. They actually touched noses today And she didn't hiss at him when he walked by.

Sneaky's going to be harder. She still won't share anything. We let him stay inside last night. He wandered upstairs into our room. Another BAD IDEA. Sneaky decided it was HER room, HER upstairs and there was growling, hissing and then she tried to swat him. I removed him and put him into the garage. I don't know if the two of them will ever be friends.

And yeah- Sneaky did live with another male cat for over 9 years. But then he died and she was an "only" for about 6 months until we got Holly.

It may take time. I've BTDT so I know how you're feeling
Cheryl

I agree. I've found good prices on Amazon. One cartridge lasts a month.

Just a quick clarification - you "apply" it (spray it) to the walls and furniture and stuff at about cat head height (avoid the litter box area). You do not apply it to the cat!

Awwww.... When he's comfy, we can help with ideas on how to manage the introductions.

SO glad to hear he's doing better!