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post #1 of 27
2/12/11 at 8:47pm
Thread Starter 
Ok, so I want opinions on if I am being a bit petty here.

I took my son, his girlfriend, her mom and my daughter out for a Hibachi Japanese dinner tonight. My family had never been to one and thought it was great. The GF complained alot. The food wasn't as good as this other restaurant they went to and the show wasn't as entertaining.

I got a little miffed since I paid for it all...the mom said she would leave a tip and gave me a $20.00. That was not even 15% of the bill so I put in more.

I would never think of vocalizing displeasure with a free meal. It really did make me mad that they didn't seem to appreciate it.

Next time, we will go to Taco Bell.
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post #2 of 27
2/12/11 at 8:51pm
That is extremely rude, I could not imagine someone taking me out to dinner and then having the balls to complain about it after and during!
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post #3 of 27
2/14/11 at 4:59am
The next time you go, make THEM pay for YOU! Not petty at all hun, I would have been miffed as well.
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post #4 of 27
2/14/11 at 5:13am
To be honest, l wouldn't even take them to Taco Bell after that experience!!

How ungrateful and totally ignorant of them
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post #5 of 27
2/14/11 at 5:34am
I don't think you are being petty. The girls mother should've said something to her daughter for being rude and after offering to take care of the tip she should've paid the appropriate amount.
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post #6 of 27
2/14/11 at 5:47am
You're not being petty at all. When you do something nice for somebody, they should appreciate what you've done for them.

I'm sorry they were so rude.
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post #7 of 27
2/14/11 at 6:30am
I think it is rude as well. I would have said something like, "well, next time the treat is on you and we'll go to your favourite place" and given them a big smile.
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post #8 of 27
2/14/11 at 7:48am
That's UN-gratitude for you! Even if they didn't like ANYTHING about the experience how about a little appreciation for the gesture of kindness you extended? Was this behavior a red flag for your son?
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post #9 of 27
2/14/11 at 8:21am
next time??? not even ever!
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post #10 of 27
2/14/11 at 9:02am
I agree. They were very rude. What is your son's opinion of their actions
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post #11 of 27
2/14/11 at 10:40am
Rude rude rude!! I wouldn't take them out again either! Hibachi isn't the cheapest place out there!! Sheesh!

As for the $20.... at least she paid something. But did she know the approximate total? Either way she should have told her daughter a thing or 2 about someone doing something nice for you! Wow!
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post #12 of 27
2/14/11 at 10:45am
Yep, I agree, that's really inappropriate of them to complain about a nice free dinner.

I have some issues like this sometimes, when going out with people to a restaurant that may have very limited veggie options, but I always find SOMETHING on the menu, even if it's putting a few sides together, and I am happy about it and express my gratitiude to whoever is treating. It's not JUST about the meal, it's about the people you're with!!

If something was really bad, then keep it to yourself until after you've gone home!

Yeah, don't even take them to Taco Bell! Sheesh!
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post #13 of 27
2/14/11 at 11:18am
Dont worry, your not petty at all! They were just really rude and ignorant.
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post #14 of 27
2/14/11 at 12:11pm
I agree it was rude, however, I just wonder if the girl was feeling a bit awkward about the situation and her way of coping with that type of thing is to complain. I do not handle anxiety well, and in her shoes, I would have been uncomfortable.

I used to do that when I was younger but my mother straightened me out of that real quick.

I think her mother should definitely have said something and also should have contributed the tip based on the bill, not just based on her perception.
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post #15 of 27
2/14/11 at 1:05pm
While I appreciate good manners and had parents great enough to teach them to me, I would probably just let this go. Life is too short. If I treat others to dinner, I do just that freely and expect nothing else in return. I don't let what they say bother me, that is their problem, not mine. How was it figured out what who paid what? Beforehand? Was the $20 thrown in last minute?

While that was extremely generous of you and you sound like a great and caring person, I have learned to have less expectations I guess.
Perhaps the GF felt she could "be herself" or that she could bring people together by a common topic or maybe she was really self conscious and forgot her manners or maybe she has mental health issues or problems not related to you or the dinner at all. Chances are she would have ha the same conversations regardless of who was paying, some people are just like that.

But of course it would have been better and more comfortable for everyone to just be polite and only talk about good topics over dinner - regardless of who pays or doesn't.
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post #16 of 27
2/14/11 at 1:13pm
Nah I think that it was incredibly rude and I wouldn't be paying for dinner again with them. I don't think there is an excuse that is acceptable for boorish behavior when someone takes you out to dinner. You act gracious and TRY to enjoy yourself, if you can't - then PRETEND. Complain about it all you want later, in private.
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post #17 of 27
2/16/11 at 10:12am
How old is the girlfriend??? If she's a really young teenager I would just tell her she's being rude, I mean her mother might be waiting to discipline her after when they are in private (that's what my parents always did), but still calling her out on it wouldn't have hurt...

What does your son think about this?
I agree with cococat- some people don't think about who's paying or anything like that..My parents do, so they always said I was being rude or what not, when really the last thing on my mind would be who is paying the bill Especially since next time, most likely, we would be paying, because that's what's polite IMO, to return the gesture..
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post #18 of 27
2/16/11 at 10:53am
Golly, I hope they don't get married and you are sentenced to a life time of them!
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post #19 of 27
2/16/11 at 11:49am
That was definitely rude! Hibachi isn't cheap - I love going to those restaurants, and last time I went we paid for my BIL's birthday dinner - our bill was around $85 for the 3 of us!

If someone invites me out and I'm not a fan of the restaurant, I will keep my comments to myself, but remain grateful for the generosity of the person who is offering to treat me!

I wouldn't be taking her or her mom out again, she seems a bit snooty.
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post #20 of 27
2/16/11 at 1:21pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by Wharfrat View Post
next time??? not even ever!
That was my thought.

If they had the audacity to complain about my choice of restaurants on my dime, I wouldn't bother taking them out again, ever.

So far as the tip....15% is plenty IMHO.
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post #21 of 27
2/17/11 at 3:11pm
oh my goodness. i would be VERY angry. thats rude. my boyfriends mom takes us out for lunch quite often and i wouldnt dream of complaining...about anything. even outside of going to eat! i hope your son noticed her rude manners..
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post #22 of 27
3/21/11 at 2:48pm
Thread Starter 
Sorry to rez this but they broke up today. My son is, strangely, relieved. Personally, I am glad...they were not right for each other. She was unappreciative of anything I did. I invited her to go sled riding with us and she was all for it but didn't have a sled. I bought her one and she did nothing but stand and complain.

She didn't even have the balls to tell him in person. She wrote him a note then had her mom pick her up from school.
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post #23 of 27
3/21/11 at 5:43pm
Well, she was always complaining about everything... I'd be relieved too!
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post #24 of 27
3/22/11 at 3:18pm
I probably wouldn't be taking out to any more dinners. Not to say I wouldn't go out with them again, but I just wouldn't foot the bill.
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post #25 of 27
3/22/11 at 4:01pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by zohdee View Post
Sorry to rez this but they broke up today.
Well, that didn't last long!

Sounds like she is very immature if she couldn't talk to him face-to-face.

How old is she by the way?
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post #26 of 27
3/22/11 at 4:17pm
Thread Starter 
She is 17 and he is 18. But it has gone to a new level.

Her mom brought her to school today since they both ride the same bus. The mother gave my son the evil eye when he got off the bus...funny how she timed it. That showed quite a bit of maturity on her part.

The girl has been telling so many stories as to why they broke up. The one she told her mom was that my son was pressuring her to have sex. Uh...they have NEVER been alone together and always have a parent with them when on outings.

I think the mom is just as nuts as the girl. I got her a job where I work and she has done nothing but complain about it. Her manager hates her..blah, blah, blah. She needed a job ASAP with insurance.

Neither my son or I would have an issue if the breakup was dealt with decently.
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post #27 of 27
3/22/11 at 4:58pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by zohdee View Post

Neither my son or I would have an issue if the breakup was dealt with decently.
Don't let them drag you and your son into their drama! Sounds like they are trying to make a big issue of things. Don't fall into their trap.
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