1 kitten = lonely kitten? - Page 2

TCS article on introductions: http://www.thecatsite.com/Behavior/4...cing-Cats.html

Thread on introducing cats: http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/showthread.php?t=67321

And even though I generally keep eyes on the behavior forum, I know the Caring for Strays and Ferals forum better, so I'll grab some threads on introducing cats there.

Found a great thread - and it has links to other introduction threads in it: http://www.thecatsite.com/forums/sho...d.php?t=210849 It's also a good thread, because it includes info about working with a scared kitty.



Take a deep breath! ALL WILL BE OK!

Just to add another opinion, I agree, that is normal anticipated cat behavior. NO WORRIES. New cats require an adjustment period (preferably in a "safe room"), and stranger cats require an introduction. I wouldn't be worried, this is a normal transitional hoop you just have to jump through, but they are young so I don't think it will take very long.

And yeah, Buttercup and Wesley absolutely HATED the ride back after I adopted them. At the time, I only had my Corvette, which has a intake, cam, heads, long-tube headers, and a borla exhaust so it shakes from side-to-side when idling and is quite loud and rumbly... but they're fine, they just protested during the trip.

They also hid under and behind the couch in the safe room I set up for them, but I had already been warned about this typical behavior and its just something you get through and then its done.

Darlili is absolutely right. Constantly reassure Calvin. And play it by ear - there are no rules to this. The main things are:

Focus on Calvin
Let NK get comfortable with you and his space
Positive reinforcement! Praise the heck out of either of them for being nice, for being "not mean," for anything that's good (or not negative LOL).

Use toys, food, & treats - things they love.

And I think this is important - when they're meeting, don't make their meeting about meeting - if that makes sense.

Think about kids. What would you do for a couple of 3 year olds? Would you just put two kids in a room together and sit there looking at them? Do you expect them to hug? To start laughing? No. You give them something to do, and then just... being together doing something together or at the same time seems a lot more natural.

Yes, well, with 50 fosters, it's very unlikely that any of them are properly socialized. That's just too many. His age may also have something to do with it, being a little older, it's sometimes a little bit more difficult for them to transition.

But I'm sure he'll come around quickly, and with common sense and TCS I'm sure this will work.

Aw, things have a way of working themselves out. Gary and I didn't have a clue what we were doing, and no permanent damage was done.

I do know this is one little guy that's going to be very happy in his new home.

And hoarding... if they're spayed and neutered and she's actively adopting, she's not anywhere near being a hoarder. Sounds like she might need some help with the cleaning - or maybe it was just the timing of when you came vs. when that stuff gets done. It is sad she doesn't know her limit though, because it's not what's best for the kitties.

Oh, it's scary - and especially with a 'perfect' first cat, it can be disconcerting the second time around. My Dharma was 'perfect' - like your Calvin, came out of the carrier, and very logically checked out each and every room. I sort of unconsciously expected bringing Dante in to be easy peasy - I wasn't ready for Dharma to not realize that Dante was really for her! What was I thinking! And poor Dante - looking back, he must have been very afraid being alone in the back bedroom by himself (with toys and litter box and anything I could think of).

Oh, another thought - whenever the two of them were in the same room, I made sure I had a toy (laser toy, ball, anything) near to my hands. In case I saw them staring at each other - with that look - I'd distract one, or both, with the toy. I figured if I could break up their concentration, how mad could they be at each other? And reinforced the idea that when they're nice with each other, they get even more loving and play. Oh, and if you can, maybe leave a radio on very softly in NK's room - either a light classical station, or new age, or maybe talk radio - just some background noise for NK. A night light might be nice if the room is very dark, but don't go crazy going to the store at midnight to pick up anything!

And, don't worry - vets are used to cat owners not always making their appointments right on time - I actually asked about this since herding cats is a cliche, for a reason!

The first night will be the worst - I can tell you you'll be listening for any issues or odd noises even in your sleep. But try to take a deep breath - maybe lay in a nice bottle of wine for a sip or five each evening - and give it time. No one can tell you exactly how long it will take, but with little ones like these, I'm pretty confident that before too long, you'll see them together and your heart will melt - and you'll feel rewarded for all your work and anxiety. Dharma and Dante do play with each other, and since I'm away from home during the day, I'm glad they have each other - even if I had a fairly sleepless few nights along the way. I've got to say - and I hope it's many years from now - next time around I'm going to look for a bonded pair - but even a bonded pair can react differently once they're in a forever home.

I totally agree with what other's are saying!! I have just found the safe room was the easiest way to make introductions safe and easy.. Sounds like your little guy didn't have much socialization being at such a crowded rescue, which alot are anyway.

First of all, please don't take Calvin's hissing at you when you held him personally. Cats/kittens sense of smell is incredibly intense and most don't like it when their meowmy's smell different and especially like another cat/shelter. You had just come home from this "rescue" place smelling like alot of other cats. Personally, I don't agree with the crate thing in the middle of the floor. It is way too soon for the new kitten and way too soon for Calvin. I like the sanctuary room. Bring the new kitten into the room immediately upon returning home. You should keep them separate anyways, until you get the vet check-up and kitty is healthy. Please don't rush the introduction because of you upcoming trip. Take this week and do scent transferring. Have NK and Calvin share beds i.e., have NK sleep in one bed for a couple of nights then take it out of room for Calvin to sniff and hopefully sleep in. Rub towels on one kitten and then rub towel on the other kitten, gently.

Spend alot of time with the NK in the room. When we put Magilla in her room, we put the mattresses on the floor, no bed frame. You don't want kitten to hide somewhere you can't reach him. Things will progress much more quickly if you take away any hiding places you can't reach. Go to Walmart and pick up some of those square tents, (they are so cheap and all my cats love those) get two of them and velcro them together and put a bed on one of them. That is where kitty can hide. Magilla still uses her tent, but very rarely now. The more time you spend in that room the better.

After a couple of days, (and kitty has a clean bill of health) go into the room and leave the door open for Calvin to come in - IF he wants too. And likely since it's been a couple of days, he will want to investigate the new kitten now. HISSING is normal, Calvin has had no reason to hiss since you got him RIGHT?? Don't feel bad or cry, that will only add to the stress of them adjusting to eachother. This is normal behavior. When you are done visiting in the room take Calvin out with you. And go back in a little later. Take in some interactive toys and get the kittens playing with the toy at the same time. They will soon learn to trust eachother and enjoy playing together.

If you use this process, it will be only a week or two and you should have two kittens who are becoming friends. And soon enough you can leave the room open all the time. Leave the room the exactly the same after you allow NK to roam freely, as long as possible, if not permanently. I just always have my spare room set-up as a kitty room for quarantine, or any new fosters I might have to bring. Right now it is still Magilla's room. But before that it was Perla's, Perkin's and Presley's room. Magilla has the run of the house during the day, but still sleeps in that room at night. I hope this helps as it really helps me with introducing newby's. The main thing is to get them used to eachother's smell before actually interacting directly for a couple of days.

p.s. I actually use a large piece of plexi-glass as my door to the santuary room. It is about five feet tall and can slide back and forth instread of closing the door. That way the newby can see out and my cats can see in without interacting directly. Just visually. It helps speed up the process of introduction as well as the open feeling it give the new cat in the safe room. They can hear, smell and see what is going on at all times in the house, as opposed to a closed door, while they are adjusting in their safe room. Either way is fine, I just wanted to share how I did a makeshift door.

p.s.s. Don't worry, these two kittens will be just fine, and the most important thing is LOVE, and you already know how to do that, so you are on your way to a great new family adventure with these two little darlings. Enjoy the process, they grow up too fast.....

I just wanted to add on behalf of the rescue you got Calvin from. I have dealt with this before too, feeling like they are not happy with you because you didn't choose the cat/kitten they picked for you. But, really they do understand that people are picking a cat for a lifetime and they want it to feel right and be the right fit for you and your existing cats at home. Because, if you don't feel good about the cat from the start, chances are it won't work when you get home, and they will be getting a call from you, which they don't want!! Sometimes, these adoption counselors, or even volunteers are so busy and have so much work to do that they come off sounding cold and leave the potential adopters wondering what they did wrong?? Well, nothing. They could be having a bad and very demanding day at the rescue as most are understaffed. So don't feel bad like you can't contact Calvin's rescue even though you got a new kitten from someone else. Truly, they don't mind and just move on to the next potential adopter. I am sure they would love to hear about how Calvin is doing with his new brother and would like a letter or picture for their bulletin board.

Yes, sitting on the floor is GREAT. In fact, taking a nap in there is a wonderful idea (nothing less scary than a sleeping human).

Yawning, stretching - all good things. Especially if you're sideways to him and he can watch you.

Also, when you reach your hand toward him, hold your hand in a fist. It looks like a cat head, and is far less threatening to a cat than an open hand. You can also use baby food on a spoon - a hand with yummy treats in it is good too. That said - we didn't try to force or rush the process, and we waited until they came to us. There's different thinking on this, and it's often hard to be patient and wait for them to come around. But a wand toy, at his age, is probably far more likely to entice him out from under the bed than a hand.

And yeah, removing the bed frame so there is no under the bed is a great idea. But we always let them have some hidey places - ESPECIALLY the crate you'll use to get him to and from the vet. If the crate is his safe place, it works for all of you.

But if you're going to leave the bed there, I'd throw a box under it. And if there's a table in the room, maybe drape a cloth over it. And maybe put another box out with a flap down for him to have as a hidey place. The safer he feels, the quicker he won't need hidey places.

Another trick is leaving treats behind in the place you were sitting. It'll smell like you and be warm - and then he'll associate your smell with good stuff.

Also, get a t-shirt REALLY good and sweaty. Put it under his food dish.

You might want to get Feliway spray or the diffuser if you can afford it. This helps "de-stress" scared kitties. Just don't plug it in near his boxes, or don't spray near the litter boxes.

I just remembered a new thing we did when introducing Chumley to our crew. He was separated entirely - we live in an RV and have no place to segregate a kitty, so we put him in a rented trailer. BUT apart from bringing blankets he'd been sleeping on over here, and blankets our kitties had been sleeping on over there (and letting everyone smell and investigate), we also brought over a poop and a pee occassionally and put them in the litter box! Might sound crazy - but we wanted them to get used to the scent of him being in their spots.

Now this I would not do that until you're sure he has no parasites (and honestly, I wouldn't bother paying for a fecal, I'd just have him treated with Revolution - it's a topical that treats for fleas, flea eggs, ticks, round worm and heart worm). But as poop and pee are both territorial markers, we figured getting over that scent hump would go a long way to smooth intros.