Cats + New Baby + Huge Family Dinner + Sister's Shih Tzu = Recipe For Disaster!

My mom and I are the owners of two very affectionate cats, a male (who will be 9 in March), and a 5 year old female. I'll preface my post by saying that they are both quite spoiled and doted upon. I will admit this. Also, sorry for this long post, but there are a number of things going on here!

My sister (who does not live with us) has a shih tzu who has not gotten along with either of the cats since she was a puppy. In spite of this, my sister continues to bring the dog with her when she visits, even though she can easily leave the dog with my father, who lives 5 minutes from our home. The cats try to avoid the dog as much as possible when she is visiting, but the dog continues to pursue them, in hopes that they will want to play with her (the dog is several years old).

My sister had a baby boy in October, and is now visiting more than ever. As expected, the cats are tense and anxious when the baby cries and squeals. The female tried to swat at the baby once when my grandmother (aka her best friend) was holding him for the first time, but has not since posed any threat. She will meow (not growl or hiss) if you're holding the baby near her, but neither of the cats actively seek him out. On top of what is already an uncomfortable situation for the cats, my sister will bring her dog along with the baby.

My cats (especially the male) will only become defensive when the dog is around. My sister has brought the baby without the dog maybe once or twice, and the boy cat was fine around the baby, then (the girl is still pretty territorial). I will be holding the baby, and the male acknowledges this and is calm. I was watching the baby as he was sleeping on my mom's bed, and the cat came to investigate. When he tried to jump on the bed, I calmly but firmly said, "no", and he kept his distance. He sniffed at the baby's feet, didn't growl or meow or hiss, and then left.

Yesterday evening, we were celebrating Christmas (we're Ukrainian), and had a number of people over. My sister came with the baby and dog, in spite of my mother's insistence that my sister leave the dog with my dad, because she knew that the dog would be another source of anxiety for the cats (they're very friendly, but can be overwhelmed by large groups, plus the baby). The dog also has a bad habit of pooping in our house, even if she is let outside.

My sister went upstairs where the boy cat was sleeping on my mom's bed to change the baby, and the dog ran after her, not realizing the cat was there, and jumped on the bed, pretty much in the cat's face. He got spooked and leapt at the dog, and my sister tried to intervene. Cat redirected its aggression on her (as tends to happen), and did a number on her legs and arms.

The cat's very affectionate with her when the dog is not visiting, but in spite of this, my sister is convinced that he is a "killer", and is after both her and the baby (even though the cat's beef was with the dog), and is threatening to have him taken to the vet's to be put down. She was visiting today briefly, (sans dog), and while the cat tried to be friendly with her, she kicked him whenever he came close to her. Nonetheless, not a since hiss or growl from him.

Is there anything I can do? Because the cat is only aggressive when the dog is around, both my mother and I think that the best idea is not to bring the dog when she is visiting with the baby, especially when there are people around, and we can't afford to monitor the animals to make sure that they're not fighting.

Sorry for such a long post! I'm just really worried that the baby may one day be caught in between a cat/dog scuffle.

She always was the one to get her way. Heaven and earth have to be moved to accommodate her wishes. She's never been firm with the dog. If the dog gets into a scuffle with another dog, then it's always the other dog's fault, and her little one is the poor victim, who just wants to be friends with everyone in the world.

When the dog poops in our house, she always coddles her and tells her that the "awful cats" are just making her tense, and that it's not her fault. I've never seen her scold her dog in the years she's had her. I've been on walks with her dog, and she will happily, constantly try to approach dogs who are loudly growling and yapping at her and want nothing to do with her. And my sister is the one who reassures her dog that the other person's dog is "bad" and "mean".

Her boyfriend doesn't like the dog, but puts up with it because it's hers. He tells her that the dog's got to learn the hard way not to go after the cats.

I just don't think it's fair for my sister to blame the cat for something that is entirely preventable. As much as my mom loves the cats, I know that if, heaven forbid, the baby ever got between the cat and dog, that she'd drop everything to put the cat down. But she just won't grow a pair and tell my sister "no".

I hope this can be sorted out. My mom used to have no problem telling my sister no, but now with the baby, my mom will bend over backwards not to upset her.

My sister is hellbent on having the cat destroyed, now. She insists that the cat wants to kill her and the baby, but when the dog isn't around, the cat is fine with both of them. The cat's aggression has nothing to do with her or her new son. And I fear that her own hostility towards the cat will only aggravate him further, and that he WILL soon become aggressive towards her. She was here at the beginning of the week without the dog, and the cat was rubbing up against her constantly and purring. She just doesn't take any notice.

We're careful not to have the cat very close to the baby in any case, but I take care to make sure to show him that the baby is not taking over. I give all three of them (baby, both cats) equal amounts of attention.