What our cats/ kittens mean to us (sorry: long)

We got Calvin a month ago and we love him to death. At the same time I am trying to understand my relationship with him a little more and what he means to me (other than the world). Would be great if others could share what roles their cats/ kittens play in their lives.

DH and I have been trying to have a child for a while and after various treatments, too, weâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]ve not been successful – which had led to severe depression, in my case. I know that my identity is not wrapped up solely in being a mom, but this is something we really want. With each passing day the hopeâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s been fading and for different reasons, adoption is not an immediate option, but in a few years. We have established careers, consider ourselves good and loving people and great parent material but God did not bless us with a child. I think I have adjusted ok – I am genuinely happy for others around me who are expecting, can attend baby showers etc and my sadness is something that I either keep to myself or share with DH. But my work has suffered tremendously and it was this funk I was in when hubby suggested getting a kitten and I had initially resisted (since I have some upcoming travelling) but then changed my mind and we rescued Calvin.

Heâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s just brought so much joy into our lives, itâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s unbelievable. We consider him our baby and refer to ourselves as his mommy and daddy. We do indulge him and care for him so much. He keeps us occupied so that we do not feel our loss as much. Itâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s not that we do not foster dreams of having children anymore but Calvin has given me an opportunity to be his mommy and channel some of my maternal feelings. Although I have not been able to completely overcome the hole in my heart, I feel Calvin has saved me.

Creating this post came to mind since my parents are a little concerned that I am trying to compensate for what I do not have with Calvin (I send them funny pics of him pretty often and love talking about him). We always wanted pets but we moved to a different country and needed to settle down etc. and so we had to resist getting a pet till now and so I do not think that we are trying to compensate – but I cannot deny that getting Calvin has been the best thing for us in a really long time.

Thanks for reading and will be great if others would share what their furbabies mean to you. I am sure many of you have human children and you love your furbabies as much as I do.

I've been thinking about this A LOT since my beloved Callie was put to sleep last week due to health issues.

We are childless by choice (DH has 2 adult children from a previous marriage) and my kitties are my companions. I grew up with dogs, but my personality meshes more with kitties, but I think pets in general teach us to look outside of ourselves and not to become too wrapped up in self. Pets teach us unconditional love and ultimate trust, patience, the importance of celebrating baby steps and the small things, to have fun and live in the moment, not to sweat the small stuff, like breaking things, and to enjoy a nice long nap every day. In addition, they teach us to be responsible (or at least they should) and to consider things we might not consider when making decisions. (How will this move affect my cat? Does this home have windows low enough for the cat?) Also, they fill our lives with love, joy, comfort, humor, happiness, contentment, and fun.

I wouldn't trade the past 12 years of my life with cats for anything!

Oh sweetheart, I am SO glad that Calvin has brought you so much comfort and joy... Dana and I are also childless by choice, but we too consider our cats to be our kids, and we call each other Mommy and Daddy when it comes to the kitties.

We're childless, but not by choice, and our pets have been our children, friends and companions. In a lot of ways, they're like kids who never grow up and fly the nest.

@ stephanietx: So sorry about Callie I completely agree with all that you wrote. We definitely have become way more disciplined in our lives trying to take care of Calvin. They definitely bring more meaning to our lives.

@ Kailie and jcat: Thanks for sharing. I am glad that I am not the only one who looks at my kitten as my little baby and don't know why, I feel that I will probably, with time, be able to feel more fulfilled than I do right now.

I have to agree that Abby is my little furry child.

Originally Posted by Calvin&I

DH and I have been trying to have a child for a while and after various treatments, too, weâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]ve not been successful – which had led to severe depression, in my case. I know that my identity is not wrapped up solely in being a mom, but this is something we really want. With each passing day the hopeâ€[emoji]8482[/emoji]s been fading and for different reasons, adoption is not an immediate option, but in a few years. . .

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Adoption is never an IMMEDIATE option. From the day we began our paperwork with an agency until we finally became parents, it was a long 8 years. If you do intend to adopt someday, it is never too early to start the paperwork.

I'm happy that Calvin has come into your life; it sounds as if you have loads and loads of love to share and he is going to be the happy recipient.

my bf and i went through a rough patch because i wanted marriage and a child, and he just isnt ready for that (in reality WE arent ready for it, i know we are still very young, im 23 and hes 26, but i know what i want and i act on impulse, he on the other hand must think things through and through...and think some more and usually is much more realistic about things than i am). so i convinced him to get a kitten because i was home in the mornings and at night alone bc he works such long days and i would only see him a couple hours a day (even though we live together) and i was starting to feel very very lonely and told him id be much happier with a furry friend since he wasnt around much.
when we brought jericho home it changed everything. matt (my bf) was weary at first but after a couple days i caught him talking baby talk and trying to hold him like a baby (which he loves!). he would bring home toys everyday and spend his days off texting me at work updates on funny stuff jericho was doing. i started to feel less depressed and less lonely and less like i needed to fill a void. he taught us how to be patient and how to find solutions to problems we had never had to deal with before. he has completely become our world. we spend our days texting back and forth about him, i cant wait to get home to see him, and we have stopped going out just because we'd rather be at home with him than at a bar or a friends house. ive never had a pet other than a fish because of allerigies and asthma and i never really understand the connection between pet and owner, but i now know why people become so attached and couldnt imagine a life without him. we thought we were going to lose him a month ago because of my asthma but we found a way to manage it and keep him. but when i though he was going to be gone, i became a complete wreck. i had no clue how much this crazy kitten really meant to us until then. i wouldnt leave our bed, i spent days just crying and not talking to anyone. i even went to the dr because i had no clue why i was feeling this way, we thought it was from the trauma i had gone through(almost died of an asthma attack, was intubated for 24 hours, they didnt think id make it past 6 hours though, but i did!), i was put on some medicine to help with anxiety, which did not help at all. and one day i said "im getting him back. ill do whatever it takes". so i started doing research and talking to my dr and all of a sudden i felt like myself again, i was happy, i was optimistic, and i knew i would be able to move on from all the trauma and get my life back to normal, but first things first..getting jericho back home.
once we brought him home it has made us feel like things would be ok and like we could just get back to our everyday life and grow from the experience and the knowledge we had gained. he couldnt be happier and we couldnt be happier. so i defiantely understand how important just one furry face can become when you least expect it

I'm glad you have Calvin

Lynxx was more than just a cat to me. He was my best friend. I called him my son. My parents are his Grampy and Nana. I told him how my classes went, or how my days/nights at work went. I swear he understood.

I had waited so long to have a cat of my own. That's all I ever wanted as a child. My great grandmother got cats for me, and kept them at her house. Yes I was there all the time, but it wasn't the same. Plus all Mickey 2 did was attack. All Muffins did was hide. Not exactly what I imagined having a cat would be.

Lynxx was something special. He really changed my mother's views on cats. She doesn't like animals and made it very clear no cat was ever going to come into her house. We found other cats even kittens, but I never got to keep them, no matter how I begged. But there was something about Lynxx . We found him, she fell in love with him the moment she saw him (we all did). She is the 1 who said we're keeping him. I didn't even have to beg.

Lynxx helped me with my homework. He helped my grandfather every time he was here to fix something. He hung out with my friends. He participated in our holiday traditions, and other occasions. He was always there to listen. And when he died it broke my heart, and my heart is still broken.

i secretly think that my husband has let me have all the pets that we currently have to keep me from wanting a baby. every time i mention that I'm starting to get the baby itch, he just tells me to go and cuddle with my Isis kitty haha. we both have full time jobs, and don't live in a house, but a condo, so we don't want to change our lifestyle just yet. but my furry children bring me such joy and happiness, and having a living creature to care for and depend on me is so satisfying. we too refer to them as our babies! my parents call themselves the kitty grandparents and bungrandparents. I know that we will have a child or children one day, but until then, I'm more than happy to have my furbabies.

Thanks everyone for sharing. I am so happy to be in the midst of all of you who love their fur babies so much

How's the little guy doing? Is he feeling better?

I lost one of my cats last July suddenly in a matter of under four hours one Sunday. He had complete heart failure and we had no idea he had heart disease. Potsie was only four and was pipsqueaks bf. I still have a hole in my heart from missing him. I have five cats now and each one is sooooooooooo very special to me. They are my constant companions and I do consider them my kids!!

I, too, sometimes don't want to go out or even take vacations because I can't stand to leave them!! It makes my hubby crazy! But I catch him loving on our babies too. It makes me feel so good inside to care for all of them, keep them groomed and happy, and making sure they feel safe each day.

Pipsqueak is like a real-boy! He is so darn intelligent and honestly helps me care for all of the four new kittens that have come into our life these last six months. He is the protector of Magilla (my new feral rescue). He supervises the other kittens playing with Magilla and will step in and stop things if they get to rough with her. It is truly amazing to watch

Love hearing about all of your cats. The ones that have past on to the
rainbow bridge and the ones that are still on this life journey with us. They are our fur babies!!

I've started to write a post to this thread a number of times, but can't ever seem to find the right words.

Gary and I aren't childless, though our daughter is an adopted troubled teen who was not a minor when adopted and is now in a permanent care facility (when she chooses to be there). The kitties have definitely appealed to my maternal urges... but they're so much more than that.

We do call ourselves mommy and daddy, and we think of them as brothers and sisters to each other - but in many ways, they're more like... some kind of extended family that needs special care than kids. Or children that grew up, and we live in an extended family home, and (for the most part) we treat them like adults on their own terms, though provide the special care they need. Maybe it's because ours is a collection of rescued lost souls, none of them previously owned, and all born outside to feral moms... and only a few of them were brought inside full time as actual kittens.

Absolutely they're our babies - but we totally cater to their needs, we care for them far better than we care for ourselves, and we fret about leaving them alone all day. We completely reorganized our lives, work and home to manage their care - and after that very first stray adopted us, we became not only active in rescue, but in advocacy as well.

They are SO important to our well being. We live in a small space - but in addition to that, Gary and I are partners in work as well as in life, and we spend nearly 100% of our time together. Gary is handicapped from pain, and the kitties provide so much, sometimes a reason to keep going. They can drive us crazy (as I'm sure we sometimes drive them crazy ), but we love their antics, and we try to entertain them as much as they entertain us. Their love is endless and just melts any tense moment... and we simply cannot and don't want to imagine our lives without them!

Originally Posted by stephanietx

How's the little guy doing? Is he feeling better?

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Thanks for asking, stephanietx. He is being himself and no vomitting since (touchwood) but his tummy trouble continues. He has atleast 1 "not good" poop a day. Will call the vet's office tomorrow and see what he has to say. Just hope that this is a phase.

Well, my kitties mean everything (as well as my ferrets).
I am disabled and so I am home all day and do not leave the house very often.
There were many times I was incredibly depressed about this and even thought about taking my life. But one day unexpectedly a little kitten (Kuan Yin) stumbled into our lives and it has seriously changed everything for me.
We are childless by choice and yes I call them my kids. But they also give my life PURPOSE.
I used to be so down on myself, disabled and not contributing to society, just taking up space..thoughts like that.
But now?? Now, I have a reason to get up in the morning..even if I don't feel like it. I have precious little creatures that depend on me for their well being. It MATTERS that I am here.
They are my children, they are my best friends, they are my reason I will not ever think life is worthless for me again. As long as there are animals to love and be loved by, I want to be around as long as possible

This is an intersting question. I adopted Blue and Sissy when I was about 5 mos pregnant with my oldest son. I am sure that, at that time, it definitely had something to do with my maternal instincts - especially being pregnant at the time.

As time has gone on, my cats have taken on a different role in my life. They have been my companions, my best friends, comforts to me when I was sad. I went through a divorce 3 1/2 years after I got Blue and Sis - when my human son was just barely 3. I remarried, had another child, and finally moved to where I live now.

It really wasn't until Sissy got sick that I started to realize just how much a part of me that my cats were. Sure I enjoyed loving on them, sometimes I got mad at them for getting into things - you know, the day to day. But when Sissy got sick, I came to a point where I just couldn't imagine life without her. It was then that I realized she was so much more than a comfort, a friend, something to "mother" - she was part of me. She had this little place in my heart and now there is a little sissy kitty sized hole there. It can never be filled by anything or anyone else. I think that is what our pets are - they become more than family members, more than friends - they are just a part of our heart.

Originally Posted by LDG

I've started to write a post to this thread a number of times, but can't ever seem to find the right words.

Gary and I aren't childless, though our daughter is an adopted troubled teen who was not a minor when adopted and is now in a permanent care facility (when she chooses to be there). The kitties have definitely appealed to my maternal urges... but they're so much more than that.

We do call ourselves mommy and daddy, and we think of them as brothers and sisters to each other - but in many ways, they're more like... some kind of extended family that needs special care than kids. Or children that grew up, and we live in an extended family home, and (for the most part) we treat them like adults on their own terms, though provide the special care they need. Maybe it's because ours is a collection of rescued lost souls, none of them previously owned, and all born outside to feral moms... and only a few of them were brought inside full time as actual kittens.

Absolutely they're our babies - but we totally cater to their needs, we care for them far better than we care for ourselves, and we fret about leaving them alone all day.

We completely reorganized our lives, work and home to manage their care - and after that very first stray adopted us, we became not only active in rescue, but in advocacy as well.

They are SO important to our well being. We live in a small space - but in addition to that, Gary and I are partners in work as well as in life, and we spend nearly 100% of our time together. Gary is handicapped from pain, and the kitties provide so much, sometimes a reason to keep going. They can drive us crazy (as I'm sure we sometimes drive them crazy

), but we love their antics, and we try to entertain them as much as they entertain us. Their love is endless and just melts any tense moment... and we simply cannot and don't want to imagine our lives without them!

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Laurie, Glad you found the words!! I ditto your feelings about our cats I too have one daughter, although she is older than your teen, she is twenty three. I had her when I was twelve

My cats are still my children . You know where they are at all times, they don't keep you up at night sick with worry about when they will come home, they never dissappoint you, even when they are bad it is cute, they love you unconditionally no matter what (well sometimes, they can hold a grudge - if your name is Perla ), and they tell you everything about their day !!

The kitties I do worry about are the ones I care for outside. But they are the best time-keepers in the WORLD and you can count on them to be there waiting for you with their warm meal and show such appreciation

My kitties mean the world to me and each has a "mark" on my heart forever