Hiding Kitten - Vet Visit Soon - Help

As we said on the other thread, you need to be patient... Yes, it will be frustrating... But you need to take a deep breath, give it time and keep going... Of course there is hope... Especially since she is so young... But you need to relax - your stress gets transferred to her, and that does no good....
As I mentioned on the other thread, it took me a month to even touch Lucky. And I am saying touching at all. But once she got to trust me, I can tell you, there isn't one more loving cat in the whole World. And She was 8 months old when she got here. Hope got here as a semi-feral, at two years old - she is very loving too... She still gets startled easily, but is a total lapcat. Gracie got here as a 12 year old who would hiss at my sight... They are all loving today.
Give it time, and be patient, but trust that she will turn around at her own time. It is very very important that you understand that this will happen at her time, not yours This will make it happens faster, as it will stop you from forcing you onto her, and it will save you frustration and heartbreak.

As far as the vet goes, you can coax her into the carrier, with treats and such... Put the bag there in the room already so she can get used to it in advance... But she WILL get over it - No cat likes going to the vet, most of them hate it, but they all go, and they all get over it... and so will she

At 13 weeks old, she's just a baby. I'm really sorry this is stressing you out so much, and while you're used to more socialized kitties, because you're committed to this little one (and honestly, you don't need to worry about getting her spayed for another few months. Of course she CAN be spayed earlier, but it isn't necessary), think of it the way we do.

Imagine you're a very young child. You've just lost your entire family. You are put on a plane, and flown to China. A family picks you up and brings you home. Everything looks different. Everything smells different. You don't understand what's happening or why. You are scared out of your wits. You're given your own room.

Do you want your new mom constantly hugging you, brushing your hair, loving all over you?

Or do you want to be left alone, given time to adjust?

If they feed you food you like regularly, if they clean up after you, if they make sure you stay hydrated - and leave you little toys, or play a game with you if you show interest - isn't that more comfortable for you?

And if your new mom sits in there and reads out loud, not forcing interaction - and you can just watch her and listen to her - and when she leaves, she leaves a yummy treat behind for you.... don't you start feeling more comfortable? If she lies down on a blanket on the floor and takes a nap - so you can see her, just sleeping - totally non-threatening - down at your height - doesn't that help you become more comfortable with her?

Some kids will be fine right away. Some will take weeks. Others may take a few months.

If your new mom is completely freaked out that you don't love her immediately, and all you get from her is stress vibes - doesn't that make it even more difficult for you?

***********************

Take a deep breath. Take a lot of them.

Before you go in her room, sit down. Close your eyes. Concentrate on breathing deeply and slowly. Imagine releasing your stress, your fear, your concern. Watch it "wash" away from you like the tide going out. Slow down your heart rate.

Then take your favorite book, enter the room, and sit down and start reading out loud.

Get a t-shirt good and sweaty. When you leave the room leave a yummy treat down for her on it.

Please just keep working on turning off the clock.

Oh no, we are not annoyed at all, please don't take it that way
It is just that we have been there - me, three times; going through right now with a much older lady with much deeper issues and we know how frustrating it gets, and how patient you need to be... But on the same token, we also know that all will work out in the end given the time, and you will have your love bug soon... Just be patient... We will be here for you

No one's annoyed! In fact, if it helps you to vent your stress here, definitely do it! Like Carolina says, we've all been through it, and each and every one of us had a first time too.

In fact, that's the entire point of TCS: a forum where people with experience with A, B, or C can share that experience with those who don't (yet ).

I just think it's wonderful you're so committed to her and willing to do whatever it takes for her. I just know that for us, when we stopped worrying about their "happiness" and focused on their "feeling safe," it made everything a lot easier, emotionally, for us.