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How strict does the integration guidelines have to be?

post #1 of 10
12/24/10 at 9:33pm
Thread Starter 
We camped Walter and Thomas out in our powder room. If one of them (Thomas in this instance) absolutely does NOT want to stay in there and seems fine to be out in the house, do I HAVE to keep him in there? He bolts from the room the second we open the door and freaks out when we put him back in (if we need to leave or to sleep at night). I still don't feel comfortable to leave him to roam the house unsupervised, but is it okay for him to do so when we can watch him?

He and Nora have met and while she hisses at him and swats at him every once in a while, for the most part she just watches him and he never does anything in return. He doesn't even run away, he just looks at her when she throws a hissy fit. Almost like he's thinking "What's wrong with you??" HAHA He's already playing with toys and using the scratch pad. There have been no accidents at all.

Walter has finally come out of the carrier and is sleeping in the sink now, which is a huge step. He still refuses to come out of the bathroom, though, which is okay. He'll come out eventually.

I have one question about Walter, though. He won't come out of the bathroom, but since Thomas won't stay with him he seems to get lonely. He cries for someone to come be with him all the time, and once we walk in and pet him he starts purring. After we're gone again for a couple minutes he's crying for someone again. My question is, should we give in and keep going to him, or should we ignore it some of the time (we will still go in there often, we won't completely ignore him, but at the moment he wants someone with him all the time)?
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post #2 of 10
12/24/10 at 9:41pm
If he's fine, let him out. Tails was the same way when I adopted him two months ago, he was only confined for one night. Memphis hissed at him for a week afterward, but nothing major happened.
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post #3 of 10
12/24/10 at 9:52pm
It will really depends on the cat(s) in question. I can't do fast intros w/ certain cats in my household, as they are unpleasant to newbies. Now if I brought a new cat home Lola would be thrilled & right off the bat be their new BFF. Use your own judgement, monitor social interactions closely - let Nora, Thomas, & Walter be your guides.
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post #4 of 10
12/24/10 at 10:42pm
Thread Starter 
Are there any indicators I should look for with Nora (in case she starts to get mean or anything else) in which I should take a step back and force him to stay in his room more? She is starting to chase them until they hide. Where is that line between normal adjustment behavior (hissing and whatnot) and harassment?
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post #5 of 10
12/24/10 at 11:00pm
I say stress fur flying( ie no actual contact) is my cue to go slower, Nora running and hiding or extreme hissing( you will know)
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post #6 of 10
12/25/10 at 6:04pm
We've had fosters that took a week, and we had Sheba, who could have been integrated the minute she came in the door. It just depends on the cat. No matter how long they stay in isolation, eventually they have to work it all out face to face.
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post #7 of 10
12/25/10 at 8:06pm
Thread Starter 
Quote:
Originally Posted by mrblanche View Post
We've had fosters that took a week, and we had Sheba, who could have been integrated the minute she came in the door. It just depends on the cat. No matter how long they stay in isolation, eventually they have to work it all out face to face.
Do you mean that Nora and Thomas will have to eventually fight it out for dominance or whatever? Nora has been increasingly aggressive with him, and we've tried to step in when we see her signs that she's getting to that point. She has started doing this weird thing where she bristles up and arches her back, then she angles her head down to where the top of her head is facing Thomas and she rocks it back and forth. Almost like an "if you move, I'll kill you" type of thing. We step in each time b/c I don't want anyone to get hurt. Should we just leave it alone and let them work it out?

Today we have been swapping who is out roaming the house...if the boys are allowed out then Nora is put in our room (she sleeps in there most of the day anyway), and at night and when we leave the house she is let out and the boys are put in their room.

One time today we let them both out and Nora did REALLY good, and we were sure to give her lots of positive vibes (petting her a lot, telling her she's a good girl, etc) but Thomas is scared of her now and when he finally bolted across the house to hide from her she chased him and swatted at him when he ran under the sofa. They were good around each other for about a half an hour or so.
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post #8 of 10
12/25/10 at 9:00pm
Nora and Thomas won't necessarily have to fight it out, but there will be some sort of dominance struggle. It coud be anything as light as one cat hissing and the other backing away all the way up to a full blown cat fight. Cats can't live like humans, there are no cat roommates, only alpha cat, beta cat, etc.
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post #9 of 10
12/25/10 at 9:18pm
Thread Starter 
So should I just let them work it out and only interfere if, say, I think one of them is going to get seriously hurt? Thomas has yet to even hiss back at Nora, she's doing all of it. He mainly just runs away and runs under the sofa, which she is too big to fit under.
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post #10 of 10
12/26/10 at 10:16am
What I tried to do, besides always feeding them together (but always, always the 'old' cat first - and kept telling the old cat she was my baby, and the new cat was for her, all that), was also to keep some toys at hand (da Bird, mousies, whatever) and every time I caught them staring at each other, I'd try distracting them with the toy. I figured if I could distract them, they really weren't going to kill each other.

There was still some hissing, a Halloween cat or two, and a few yowls in the middle of the night (and every time I got up, I got two really innocent faces looking at me). But, unless there's actual fur flying around, sometimes you just have to let them sort it out.

Heck, just last night there was a hissy fit for some reason - four years down the road.
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