Worried about life

kara_leigh

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I know I will probably sound like a big whiner or hypochondriac in this post, but I don't have anyone else to talk to (sad as it may be).

About 6 years ago I was diagnosed with Addison's Disease (my adrenal glands don't work so I don't produce Cortisol, among other things). It is autoimmune, and now I get sick REALLY easily, and an illness that would lay a normal person up for a couple days will lay me up for a week or more. Especially if I get a stomach bug, that can end me up in the hospital and possibly kill me.

That has been my main problem when it comes to working. I just get sick too easily. I got my CNA certificate, and started working in our local children's hopital, but no matter how well I washed my hands and used masks, I got sick ALL THE TIME. I ended up getting let go from that job b/c I used up all of my sick days too quickly (didn't help that two of my grandparents died in that time also). I LOVED working there and hated that I got fired.

Now, about a year ago I was diagnosed with a seizure disorder. I normally just have small seizures, but I have had one Tonic Clonic (what most people know as a Grand Mal). The medication that they have me on for that controls it fairly well, but with the TC and recently I had another of my small seizures, they have had to increase the dosage. I think that mixed with my other medications, makes me totally loopy. I feel like I'm drunk, and it makes it almost impossible to drive.

The last job I had for almost a year, and I think they got freaked out about my seizures, even though the small ones I have don't affect my job performance and I know the trigger for the TC one so I don't think I'll have any more of them. My last job was working with infants in childcare as a lead teacher. I love working in childcare, I have been doing it for 16 years. They used some lame excuse to let me go, but they did tell me that in one year I was sick 19 times...almost every time I had a doctors note so they were true excuses. It ends up being that way with almost every job I have. I end up getting let go b/c I'm sick too much. Doesn't help that I end up working for people that let sick kids come, even though we're not supposed to...then *I* get sick in turn. HELLO!

Now my husband wants me to try to go on disability. I don't blame him b/c we are totally dead broke. When I got let go of my last job he just told me to stay home since we figured we'd be selling our house soon and be moving anyway. That was 3 months ago. It's been nice, though, b/c I haven't really been sick at all these whole three months. Kind of hard to get sick, though, when you never leave the house.

Anyway...I'm not sure if I would even qualify for disability, but if I did I'm just worried that it would affect our ability to adopt in the future. Once we move and get back on our feet we hope to adopt someday, and I'm afraid if they see me being on disability they will say NO WAY, and we'll never have a second child. I heard it can be really hard to get onto disability anyway, and with us moving to a different state, would it even be worth it? Does it even transfer, or would I have to go through it all over again when we move? Does anyone know?

It's not that I'm trying to get out of having to work. I LOVE working in childcare, I LOVE babies (I get my baby fix that way) and I know so much about it. I was a nanny once, and I loved that job, but I don't know if it's my age (32, almost 33) that is preventing me from getting a position or what, but I can't seem to get another one.

Heck, I would even get a job sacking groceries or something, but I also have arthritis so I have a hard time standing up for long periods of time. That's why I prefer childcare, b/c I can sit down on the job and not get in trouble for it. lol I just have so many health problems, I feel like my body has let me down. Anymore, since I can't drive, I rarely get out of my pajamas, and when I do it's just to wash them each night, and all I do is sit at my computer b/c I don't have anything better to do. *cry*
 

carolina

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Kara, IMHO, one step at a time, and let's take care of the "now" issue... Who knows what the future brings?
I know that in the state of California for example, if you can't work for over 12 days for medical reasons, you fall into the disability spectrum... It doesn't mean you are disabled for life.
I take anti-seizures medicine for migraines, and I know how debilitating they were for a good while, until my body got used to them - I got completely stupid for a good 3-4 months... Let alone lethargic... Good thing I was unemployed during that period, as I am sure I could not hold a job.
IMHO, if you can not work due to medical reasons, by all means, apply for disability... the worst that can happen is a denial; if you don't apply, a "denial" is a sure thing, right?
Print out the forms and take them to your doctor to fill out. If this is what you need to do for your survival, to keep your house, to feed your family, do it! Think about tomorrow when tomorrow comes - that is when you worry about tomorrow... tomorrow. Today you deal with the present issues.
You can go off disability any time, your doctor just needs to sign off the papers saying you are ok to work, and you are good to go...
Good luck sweetie...
 

ldg

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First of all, I really sorry hun.
Gary's immune system is shot from 24 hour/day pain, and almost no sleep - it's nearly impossible for him not to get sick all the time. He used to love grocery shopping. Now he waits in the car for me.


I agree 100% with Carolina. One step at a time, one day at a time. Do what's best for you now, and when things are stable, then worry about next steps.
 

swampwitch

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I'm so sorry.
I have a compromised immune system and I know what a struggle it is to stay well! Any kind of childcare is going to make it an extra challenge, I know from experience, too. I found the best job is an administrative one, preferably with one's own little office, where you don't deal with the public. Anyway, sending lots of vibes that things work out. Hang in there and keep trying and it will!
 

darkmavis

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First of all,


You're not whining, you're worried, and justifiably so. I don't know what to say really except go ahead and apply for disability. And if you get denied, then apply again. Best of luck to you!!!
 

larussa

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Wow you are certainly going through so much right now, I feel so bad for you. I hope you will be able to collect disability until you are on your feet again and I know you will be. Sending you many healthy and hoping things will get better for you very soon.
 
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kara_leigh

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Thank you everyone, I really appreciate it.


Originally Posted by SwampWitch

I'm so sorry.
I have a compromised immune system and I know what a struggle it is to stay well! Any kind of childcare is going to make it an extra challenge, I know from experience, too. I found the best job is an administrative one, preferably with one's own little office, where you don't deal with the public. Anyway, sending lots of vibes that things work out. Hang in there and keep trying and it will!
I don't even know where to start looking for a job like that. Every scrap of my experience since I was 16 years old is in childcare (minus 4 years of PT work as a check out girl at a nursery and garden center while also working at a preschool). The problem is, too, that we will be moving as soon as our house sells. At this point, since we have to give up the house we found, we don't even know WHERE we are moving to or WHEN. With the house we had found, we were moving near a somewhat big-ish town so opportunities for jobs would be pretty good. Some of the houses we are looking at now are in the middle of nowhere, so jobs will be scarce.
 

tavia'smom

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I don't know about where you live, but in Kentucky it usually takes three times to get your disability. I am sorry you are going through this. I have been sick alot in the last year and I couldn't imagine having to go through what you are. I do know that I am thinking about getting a degree in medical coding and billing, mostly due to this last injury to my shoulder, I want to be able to work from home and since this is the second time I have hurt this shoulder in two years I just see future problems coming with it. So maybe you could think about that.
 
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