Funny but Sad ... Be Very Afraid, They Walk Among Us!

Got this email forwarded to me - so sharing.

IDIOT SIGHTING
This was at the Ford dealership in Canton , MS

When my husband and I arrived at an automobile dealership to pick up our car, we were told the keys had been locked in it. We went to the service department and found a mechanic working feverishly to unlock the driver side door. As I watched from the passenger side, I instinctively tried the door handle and discovered that it was unlocked. 'Hey,' I announced to the technician, 'it's open!' His reply: 'I know. I already got that side.'

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IDIOT SIGHTING :
We had to have the garage door repaired.
The Sears repairman told us that one of our problems was that we did not have a 'large' enough motor on the opener.

I thought for a minute, and said that we had the largest one Sears made at that time, a 1/2 horsepower.
He shook his head and said, 'Lady, you need a 1/4 horsepower.' I responded that 1/2 was larger than 1/4. He said, 'NO, it's not.' Four is larger than two.'

We haven't used Sears repair since.
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IDIOT SIGHTING:

My daughter and I went through the McDonald's take-out window and I gave the clerk a $5 bill. Our total was $4.25, so I also handed her a quarter.
She said, 'you gave me too much money.' I said, 'Yes I know, but this way you can just give me a dollar bill back. She sighed and went to get the manager, who asked me to repeat my request. I did so, and he handed me back the quarter, and said 'We're sorry but we could not do that kind of thing.' The clerk then proceeded to give me back $1 and 75 cents in change.

Do not confuse the clerks at McD's.
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IDIOT SIGHTING : From Kingman , KS
I live in a semi rural area. We recently had a new neighbor call the local township administrative office to request the removal of the DEER CROSSING sign on our road. The reason: 'Too many deer are being hit by cars out here! I don't think this is a good place for them to be crossing anymore.'

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IDIOT SIGHTING IN FOOD SERVICE : -- From Kansas City
My daughter went to a local Taco Bell
and ordered a taco. She asked the person behind
the counter for 'minimal lettuce.'
He said he was sorry,
but they only had iceburg lettuce.
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IDIOT SIGHTING : Happened in Birmingham , Ala.
I was at the airport, checking in at the gate when an airport employee asked, 'Has anyone put anything in your baggage without your knowledge?' To which I replied, 'If it was without my knowledge, how would I know?' He smiled knowingly and nodded,
'That's why we ask.'

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IDIOT SIGHTING : She was a probation officer in Wichita, KS
The stoplight on the corner buzzes when it's safe to cross the street. I was crossing with an intellectually challenged coworker of mine. She asked if I knew what the buzzer was for. I explained that it signals blind people when the light is red. Appalled, she responded, 'What on earth are blind people doing driving?!'

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IDIOT SIGHTING : This was a lunch at Texas Instruments.
At a good-bye luncheon for an old and dear coworker who was leaving the company due to 'downsizing,' our manager commented cheerfully, 'This is fun. We should do this more often.' Not another word was spoken. We all just looked at each other with that deer-in-the-headlights stare.

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IDIOT SIGHTING : A deputy with the Dallas County Sheriffs office, no less.

I work with an individual who plugged her power strip back into itself and for the sake of her life, couldn't understand why her system would not turn on.
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How would you pronounce this child's name? This child attends a school in Kansas City , Mo. Her mother is irate because everyone is getting her name wrong

"Le-a"

Leah?? NO
Lee - A?? NOPE
Lay - a?? NO
Lei?? Guess Again.


It's pronounced "Ledasha", When the Mother was asked about the pronunciation of the name, she said, "the dash don't be silent."

SO, if you see something come across your desk like this please remember to pronounce the dash.

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I don't really know how true to life these are, but some of them ring true.

I've definitely run into things like the McDonald's scenario, where people get absolutely flustered if the cash register cannot tell them the right amount of change. What's really sad is I've been unemployed for a long time (well, not anymore, finally started a new job on Friday), but with a Bachelor's degree and 12 years of accounting experience, I could never get hired at any retail place even when I insisted that $8 an hour was fine.

ETA: Oh, and my sister just told me a story about a friend of hers who went to Quizno's for subs for the family and tried to use a $1 off coupon. The cashier said the coupon wasn't good at THAT store, and got her manager. The manager said the same thing, but then produced a buy one get one free coupon from behind the counter that she let my sister's friend use. So she'd give her a free sandwich, but not a dollar off...

Originally Posted by Mystik Spiral

I've definitely run into things like the McDonald's scenario, where people get absolutely flustered if the cash register cannot tell them the right amount of change.

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Same here. I'll never forget the time I went into a fast food place and the registers were down. They were using a calculator to figure the change. The girl took my money, got busy on the calculator, and gave me back $1.50 too much. When I told her she had given me too much change she insisted that she hadn't and showed me the calculator. When I was 16 I had a job working in a restaurant. This is back in the day when the cash registers didn't calculate the change for you, and they taught me how to do it by counting backward. Its a shame they don't teach it that any more, just as a backup.

Originally Posted by Mystik Spiral

... I could never get hired at any retail place even when I insisted that $8 an hour was fine.

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you were too over qualified - they figured you'd bail for a better paying job when it became available, so they didn't want to spend the time, and paperwork requirements just for you to leave

glad you've found work !!! hope you'll be happy there!

lol, I can believe everyone of them! Working in a call center, I quickly learned just how stupid some people are. For example:

"I faxed in my form to withdrawal my money 5 days ago!"
"I'm sorry, the fax apparently didn't come because it isn't in our computer system."
"Well, why didn't you call me to tell me you didn't receive the fax???"

Huh?

I actually had a good "real life" moment at the market not to long ago. The woman in front of me paid for her groceries in cash, and used an older $20. The cashier swore up and down it was a counterfeit and called the manager. She asked the manager if she should call the police. She honestly had never seen an older $20 before! The manager was fine with it (apparently, he has dealt with "real money" before ). I would have been miffed since I hate standing in line, but it was too amusing to get really upset.

Originally Posted by calico2222

lol, I can believe everyone of them! Working in a call center, I quickly learned just how stupid some people are. For example:

"I faxed in my form to withdrawal my money 5 days ago!"
"I'm sorry, the fax apparently didn't come because it isn't in our computer system."
"Well, why didn't you call me to tell me you didn't receive the fax???"

Huh?

I actually had a good "real life" moment at the market not to long ago. The woman in front of me paid for her groceries in cash, and used an older $20. The cashier swore up and down it was a counterfeit and called the manager. She asked the manager if she should call the police. She honestly had never seen an older $20 before! The manager was fine with it (apparently, he has dealt with "real money" before

). I would have been miffed since I hate standing in line, but it was too amusing to get really upset.

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I tried to us an old $20 at Walmart. They had to call the manger, the girl said they had to check because she was sure it was counterfeit. The manager looked at it then took it to his office, he came back and told the cashier it was just an old $20. I had 2 others. I deposited them into the banking machine and got new 20's.

Several months ago I was in the grocery store. I ordered 1/2 pound of Muenster cheese and 3/4 pound of provolone.

Clerk: We don't weigh in pounds; we only weigh in ounces. How many ounces of Muenster and provolone do you want?

Me: 1/2 pound is 8 ounces. 3/4 pound is 12 ounces.

Clerk: So how many ounces of each do you want?

Me: May I please have 8 ounces of Muenster and 12 ounces of provolone?

Clerk: Well, why didn't you say so?

I really fear for our future.

I worked tech support and all those stories you read are true.

OMG If I had to deal with that kind of stupidity I would have a freakin coniption in the store. Im guilty like any other person of having dumb moments..it happens but nothing like that kinda stuff...the worst stupid moment I had was at Tractor Supply trying to explain to the cashier why we were walking out and not buying anything. She was ADAMENT that they carried Purina busy bones which I had coupons for and figured why not try them out for Franklin as chewies...So I had to procede to walk the cashier back to the pet department show her ALLLLLLLL the purina products they had and explain to her that the pictures do not match the coupon and and she swore up and down they carry those bones...After 10 minutes of BF laughing at her and me explaining the difference between what she thought a busy bone was and what it actually was she stated to me "You should get a job here your much better at it than I am"......I had to walk away at that point while saying...DUHHHHHHHH

Its pretty bad when I know that store better than the manager and employees do.

Hey, I worked at McDonalds when I was young!!

(and I was terrible at counting change without the machine too.)

I have one that I happen to know is true, as it happened to a friend of mine. He used to work in tech support for Acer computers. Then this happened:

"Acer Tech support. How can I help you?"

"I was just typing a document and then all of a sudden everything shut off."

"Check the back of the computer and see if everything is plugged in. Sometimes people accidentally kick the cords and unplug something."

"I can't see if they're plugged in or not. It's too dark in here."

"So turn a light on."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"The power's out."

There was then a long pause. Finally my friend said:

"Do you still have the box and receipt from your computer?"

"Yes"

"Ok then you should pack it up and take it back to where you bought it from."

"Is it really that bad?"

"I'm afraid so."

"Well what should I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too stupid to use a computer."

Originally Posted by Mystik Spiral

ETA: Oh, and my sister just told me a story about a friend of hers who went to Quizno's for subs for the family and tried to use a $1 off coupon. The cashier said the coupon wasn't good at THAT store, and got her manager. The manager said the same thing, but then produced a buy one get one free coupon from behind the counter that she let my sister's friend use. So she'd give her a free sandwich, but not a dollar off...

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That's not something that's stupid. Some stores simply aren't able to take specific coupons. To do so can get a person wrote up (which can ruin chances for raises or lead to getting fired). Other times their computers simply will not even scan it in/recognize it. That the manager more than made up for it with a better coupon was very nice of her.
Unfortunately chains sometimes make no sense like that.


If you want to know stupid. Try having to deal with people that insisted they didn't know proper return dates on movies when there was two ~6'X4' signs stating it, their receipt, and us always telling them the exact day due. They were claiming ignorance to get out of their late fees, often when even if it had been seven day rental the movies would have still been late.

TigerOnTheProwl;2963612 said:

I have one that I happen to know is true, as it happened to a friend of mine. He used to work in tech support for Acer computers. Then this happened:

"Acer Tech support. How can I help you?"
"I was just typing a document and then all of a sudden everything shut off."
"Check the back of the computer and see if everything is plugged in. Sometimes people accidentally kick the cords and unplug something."
"I can't see if they're plugged in or not. It's too dark in here."
"So turn a light on."
"I can't."
"Why?"
"The power's out."
There was then a long pause. Finally my friend said:
"Do you still have the box and receipt from your computer?"
"Yes"
"Ok then you should pack it up and take it back to where you bought it from."
"Is it really that bad?"
"I'm afraid so."
"Well what should I tell them?"
"Tell them you're too

stupid to use a computer."[/QUOTE

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TigerOnTheProwl;2963612 said:

]

This made my day, and it's EARLY so the rest my day is set for GREAT!

I laughed so hard the cats all ran for hiding.

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Originally Posted by TigerOnTheProwl

I have one that I happen to know is true, as it happened to a friend of mine. He used to work in tech support for Acer computers. Then this happened:

"Acer Tech support. How can I help you?"

"I was just typing a document and then all of a sudden everything shut off."

"Check the back of the computer and see if everything is plugged in. Sometimes people accidentally kick the cords and unplug something."

"I can't see if they're plugged in or not. It's too dark in here."

"So turn a light on."

"I can't."

"Why?"

"The power's out."

There was then a long pause. Finally my friend said:

"Do you still have the box and receipt from your computer?"

"Yes"

"Ok then you should pack it up and take it back to where you bought it from."

"Is it really that bad?"

"I'm afraid so."

"Well what should I tell them?"

"Tell them you're too

stupid to use a computer."

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I thought my computor tech was being a idiot when he asked me if it was plugged in. I can't beleive they have to ask that question.

Originally Posted by mbjerkness

I thought my computor tech was being a idiot when he asked me if it was plugged in.

I can't beleive they have to ask that question.

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Techs have a script they have to follow and often have their calls recorded.

Though the supposed "friend" story sounds like one that's been circulating on the internet for years. I can remember seeing one in much the exact same format ~10 years ago. Before everyone had computers the story had other appliance variations - like a tv.

It took me a minute to find which number it was since I couldn't remember the name..
http://xkcd.com/806/ - tech support related, don't forget to mouse over the comic. I love this webcomic, one of the few ones I do like. If you're not techie, into physics/mathmatics, or a linux user many jokes will be lost on you, though.
And the sad thing is that if you do answer that you use an OS besides mac or windows the tech support person is lost.

Originally Posted by calico2222

I actually had a good "real life" moment at the market not to long ago. The woman in front of me paid for her groceries in cash, and used an older $20. The cashier swore up and down it was a counterfeit and called the manager. She asked the manager if she should call the police. She honestly had never seen an older $20 before! The manager was fine with it (apparently, he has dealt with "real money" before

). I would have been miffed since I hate standing in line, but it was too amusing to get really upset.

Click to expand...

A friend of mine had a really bad experience at a busy McDonald's a few years ago. My friend was buying lunch for herself and her four kids. She pulled out a hundred dollar bill to pay for the meals since she didn't have any other money with her, and the employees and manager were so sure that this was a counterfeit bill that they did call the police. My friend was detained and questioned for some time. Eventually the police decided everything was ok, and my friend and her family finally got their food a whole hour after they had ordered it. They never went back there again!

Originally Posted by calico2222

lol, I can believe everyone of them! Working in a call center, I quickly learned just how stupid some people are. For example:

"I faxed in my form to withdrawal my money 5 days ago!"
"I'm sorry, the fax apparently didn't come because it isn't in our computer system."
"Well, why didn't you call me to tell me you didn't receive the fax???"

Huh?

Click to expand...

My sister used to work at Oppenheimer funds and had a customer who wanted to withdraw some money from her account and needed the funds ASAP. My sister explained that the fastest they could do was overnight the check to her. The woman then asked my sister if there was any way she could get the check faxed to her...

Originally Posted by Mystik Spiral

My sister used to work at Oppenheimer funds and had a customer who wanted to withdraw some money from her account and needed the funds ASAP. My sister explained that the fastest they could do was overnight the check to her. The woman then asked my sister if there was any way she could get the check faxed to her...

Click to expand...

Actually - you might be able to cash a faxed check ...

http://www.credit-to-cash-advisor.co...ns/ChecksbyFax

...

Accepting checks by fax is a fairly easy process once you get a few things in place. It's a good idea to talk with your bank before you get started. That way you'll be clear on any requirements they may have for receiving these checks for deposit. It'll avoid frustration and backtracking later on.

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...

really, a very interesting article - tells you what you need, and what you do ...

I once tried to buy lace by the yard at a craft store. Actually, most trim and lace ARE sold by the yard, but this was special lace (read: expensive) and was sold by the foot. The young female clerk couldn't measure it by the foot-- she actually did not know how much a foot was. She kept holding up the lace to the yardstick that was mounted on the cutting counter, trying to guess at it. After many tries, she just measured out a yard, and gave it to me for the price of a foot! And no, she wasn't from another country that used the metric
system, in case you were wondering!

A former neighbor, many, many years ago had a baby girl who was just learning to talk. The baby babbled some unintelligble word. The mother asked me if I thought the word was French, as they had some French blood in them, and thought her girl was speaking French because of that. She also asked my Mom, who is British, if she had trouble learning the language when she came to America! Mom replied, "Jane, we INVENTED the language!" This same neighbor also thought the church bells that rang several times a day were organ music.

My best friend took her daughter to visit a college in western PA. We were eating lunch a few days later, and she said, "I can't believe they named a mountain after that guy!" "Huh?" "You know, Mt. Arafat!" "Are you sure it's not Mt. ARRARAT, named after the mountain in Turkey where they think Noah's Ark is?" "Oh." She had no answer for why people near Pittsburgh would name anything after Yasir Arafat...and this woman has a master's degree, yet!

Of course, I'm not entirely innocent of stupidity myself: I once nearly asked a store mannequin directions to the bathroom in local mall. To be fair, that store's female clerks often stood outside of the jewelry display cases when there were no customers, and they were always well-dressed--just like the mannequins. I thought the mannequin was one of them--I was in a hurry to find a bathroom QUICKLY.

I admit I have dingy moments at times everyone does but one of the best was the other day at work I was taking vital signs and our clinical leader was outside of the room and the patient was watching a hunting show and they had turkeys on there and she goes was that a chicken and I laughed and said no its a turkey she then asks if the turkey was in the room and I being the smart aleck was like um yep we have a turkey in the room and the patient was laughing and I was like a Allison its on tv and she was like well I didn't know.