Now I feel sick

I was on facebook, and my cousin's husband and her share an addy and I get a message saying hi and I figured out pretty quickly it wasn't her it was her husband. And he starts by asking if I play adult games and I was like uh no. At the time I was question who I was talking to and then he tells me its Eric, and then asks if I would be comfortable playing an adult game if I was hanging out with them. I told him he didn't need to be asking me questions he couldn't ask infront of her and he said she has changed. I told him I didn't think she had changed that much and besides if she would be okay with him asking it wouldn't have to be a secret. I am disgusted now. My cousin and I are very close we were raised like sisters. And he was like I am not trying to start stuff I just wanted to make better friends. Should I tell her or leave well enough alone?

What the hell! That is extremely inappropriate of him. I would definitely tell your cousin! That kind of behavior is unacceptable and extremely unfair to you, because it puts you in a bad position through no fault of your own. I know that if my BF was doing that kind of stuff behind my back, I'd hope that my cousin would tell me.

You need to tell her...

Yeah, I'd tell her.

I disagree- don't say a word. Unless you want to lose your friendship with her-then by all means tell her. If he is messing around on the internet let her find out from someone that isn't you.

Originally Posted by hissy

I disagree- don't say a word. Unless you want to lose your friendship with her-then by all means tell her. If he is messing around on the internet let her find out from someone that isn't you.

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I agree, don't say anything.

I say tell her - and if you can show her the proof...

I would want to know if it was me.

This is a situation where you are d*mned if you do tell and d*amned if you don't!

If you tell your cousin what happened, she may or may not believe you and would probably think YOU were the one that asked. It was on FB and how would you prove the conversation unless you sill had the IM chat?

If you don't tell, then next time you are with your cousin or them as a couple, it would be pretty awkward and she may think something is up.

There is no good solution to this. But you could try a "3rd" party conversation with your cousin on how would you handle this situation without naming the parties....do you know what I mean?

I would absolutely tell her simply because I would want to know myself! Copy and paste the whole conversation and send it to her.

If you still have the conversation, tell her, using it as proof.

Originally Posted by Tara & Rob

If you still have the conversation, tell her, using it as proof.

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if it was my partner saying stuff id want to know to its better coming from you rather than some random women she might not know

What a creeper! Tell her for sure.

See I think I should tell her or atleast 2 years ago I would have known for sure but she has changed so much since she has gotten with him and I just don't know what to think. I do know her daughter hates him and this makes me wonder and her daughter told her as much and now she tells everyone that her own daughter is a lying b***** and before him she would have killed someone fo talking about her daughter like that. I am kind of torn about what to do. We were so close before him and now she is totally against my sister and half the time I don't hear from her. But here is my thing if he said this to me what has he said to her 17 year old daughter.

I don't really understand what you are saying but from my impression of the content it is totally inappropriate. I have a couple cousins that I am close to and would not only tell but show the messages.

I also would not say anything to her, but I would keep the emails/messages JIC you ever have to use it as evidence. You don't know what either of them would do under the circumstances.

I have had to "deal" with married men and sometimes I knew or had met the wives. I never said anything about it to the women, b/c they likely would have turned on ME!

Originally Posted by hissy

I disagree- don't say a word.

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But tell him you've kept a printed copy of your chat on what he's said to you, his cards marked and your keeping your eyes and ears open, because if he can do it to you he'll be doing it with others, so if he doesn't stop his dirty little antics your opening the can of worms!

That's what i would do anyway

Sounds like a potential pedophile to me if he is approaching the daughter too.

And the cousin prefers to believe the man, not her daughter? That's a sad all too familiar story. She won't believe you either then, even if you have saved a transcript, but since a child is involved, I would tell her anyway, as a moral duty.

I think I'd be offering the daughter a safe place to live away from the creep her mother thinks is so wonderful. (I know you are not in a position to do that, just saying what I would do)

Originally Posted by otto

Sounds like a potential pedophile to me if he is approaching the daughter too.

And the cousin prefers to believe the man, not her daughter? That's a sad all too familiar story. She won't believe you either then, even if you have saved a transcript, but since a child is involved, I would tell her anyway, as a moral duty.

I think I'd be offering the daughter a safe place to live away from the creep her mother thinks is so wonderful. (I know you are not in a position to do that, just saying what I would do)

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I agree. Have you talked to the daughter? I would never call my daughter a lying bi***. No man could ever make me think my children are lying.

IIRC, facebook transcrips can't be saved. Please correct me if I am wrong.

Yes they can - She can take screen shots and save them as jpg images....

Originally Posted by JustJayde

Yes they can - She can take screen shots and save them as jpg images....

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Press the "PrtSc" button, usually next to the "F12" button. Then open something simple like MS Paint, then paste, then do a "save as"