Am I Losing My Mind?

I miss Bella desperately!! Even though I know she is in a Wonderful place and being looked at by my mom...I fall asleep with her on my mind and wake up the same way.
odd things began to happen after Genesis passed away. At night, while in bed, I could feel both Bella and Genesis jump into bed with me. It a feeling I'm sure most of us have felt before so I'm positive that's what it was.
Then I began hearing that familiar sound of Bella stratching around in her litter box.
Now, as of two nights ago, I am beginning to see Bella. I see her out of the corner of my eye while I'm reading or watching TV or on the computer. I can feel her sitting near me, watching me, when I look over she is gone.
Now that I've probably alienated everyone with these experiences--I'm wondering if this is the way grief can play with our minds. What does it mean? Am I having some kind of a breakdown or is there a message in all this? This has been quite a crazy time in my life--and I would never think about sharing this with ANY one else.
There are many times when I feel like I'm healing from this nightmare. Then other times when I'm almost paralyzed because I don't have Bella. What is going on?? All of this really began after the death of Genesis...you all remember that ordeal.

You are grieving sweetheart, and we all grieve differently. The bond you had with Bella was so strong, that of course you are going to feel this way. I don't doubt that both she and Genesis are with you in some way or another!

No you're not losing your mind at all, you are still grieving. When I first lost my beloved Misty, I would see her sitting in the hallway at night watching me while I was in bed. I haven't seen her since but she is on my mind more than she should be.

While petting Autumn I keep wishing it was Misty that was on my lap, I know I shouldn't have these thoughts but I just can't help it. Yes I am still grieving and Misty will be gone two years on Nov. 22nd. My heart will hurt for the rest of my life so no, you are not losing your mind.

Originally Posted by LaRussa

No you're not losing your mind at all, you are still grieving. When I first lost my beloved Misty, I would see her sitting in the hallway at night watching me while I was in bed. I haven't seen her since but she is on my mind more than she should be..

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This makes me feel better. I don't mind the "visions". When they stop then I know I'll miss them! I just want to know that she's at peace. If she's coming back to me like this then I worry that her spirit is restless. She was taken so suddenly that the thought comes into my head that maybe she wants to come back...Oh that's crazy I know...

No you aren't losing your mind.

Chynna has been gone since July 3, 2010, and I swear that sometimes I hear her meowing, or settling on the pillow beside my head, or jumping up on the bed.

I think we just miss them so much that our brain replays vivid memories for us.

You just miss Bella so much that it feels like she is still there. It will take a while for your grieving process to end.

I see Boomer all the time out of the corner of my eye. I just say "Hey Boom" just like I always did.

I feel comforted knowing his spirit is with me.

Hi hun, I'm so sorry that you are feeling like this, it is grief and its not nice and nobody can say when it will pass as everyone is different. I do however believe in spirits though and I do think Bella may be coming to you but this is my personal opinion and not everyone will agree. suffered panic attacks when dh's gran passed away and sometimes now I feel ill when I think about it, I don't think we ever get over losing a loved one. I hope you feel better very soon hun and you know where I am if you need to talk.xx

Oh sweetie, I understand, and if you're losing your mind then a lot of us are right there with you.
The first thought that came into my head when I read your original post was, "Bella has come to let her know that Genesis is with her and is ok."
You mentioned that your Mom is taking care of Bella; when my Belle was dying I told her that her Grandpa (my Dad) would be waiting for her, and he would think she was the most beautiful cat he'd ever seen. Maybe Bella wants you to know that your Mom is taking care of Genesis, too.
You lost Bella suddenly; perhaps she just wants to let you know that everything is alright, and has come to say 'goodbye'.
Please don't think you're having a breakdown or are going crazy. If we didn't love our fur-kids so much, it wouldn't hurt so much to lose them.

I don't think you're losing your mind. I'm sure their spirits are still with you and they want you to know they are okay.

Having recently lost Jack myself, I still sense that he's jumping on the bed... last night, even, I swore he was padding around on the bed near my legs, on the opposite side of where JoJo was curled up...

I know Jack was okay with crossing over. I talked to the pet psychic before taking him to Dove Lewis and she reported back that he was okay with it. I know JoJo is lonely... she's been eating fine, and still grooming, but is VERY clingy... I still hesitate in getting her a new companion so soon.... it's a tough call.

We've all been through this. if we're tuned in to our cats (which my pet psychic says we are have the ability to do), we can sense things with them... we can still feel a hint of their presence. I still feel Jack's... I always will. You will always sense Bella's presence... it's that she's watching over you to make sure you're doing okay.

When I lost Banshee last year, my entire world was torn apart. All I could do was sit there and cry. I would dream about her at night. I would dream that I was walking through the house crying and calling to her....I could hear her meowing, but I couldn't find her. I had that dream for months and months. It got to the point where I didn't want to go to sleep anymore.

Then it gradually lessened and I haven't dreamed about Banshee since Mollipop decided to come home with us. That doesn't mean I don't think about her; I do. Every single day.

I dearly love Mollipop and I wouldn't give her up for anything. When she first came here, I caught myself a couple of times calling her Banshee. And I felt guilty. There were a couple of times when I'd look at her and think "You're beautiful, but I wish you had white paws!" And that's wrong, too. Miss Pop is a kitty in her own right and she's my little girl. She's well on her way to becoming a heart kitty in my life. And now, when she's in my arms, I'm OK.

That will come for you, too. It's so hard to lose that heart kitty, the one who means so much to you that you worship the ground she walks on. But, in time, it will be OK. You will still miss her....that will never, ever go away. And you'll never stop thinking about her. But someday, you'll think of her and, even though, you're crying, you may find yourself smiling through your tears. Maybe it's something so cute that she used to do. Maybe it's just the way she used to look at you. Maybe it's the way her tail twitched when you said her name. But you'll remember. And you'll smile. It will take time. But it will happen.

You are in good company here. Whenever I have lost a kitty, the pain would ebb and flow. Sometimes 6 months out I would grieve more than at 6 weeks. There will be times when you are ok and times when it is impossible not to weep.

At least that is how it was with me. Whether it was loosing my parents or my furkids, it was the same.

Eventually, at least for me, it all evened out. But, if I think too much of one of my cats, the tears are always right behind my eyes ready to fall. I still cry at the loss of my horse, 40 years ago.

God bless, hun. Hugs

I don't think I can add anything to what has already been said. Maybe you could consult a Pet Psychic like Rub ****'s Mommy did, if it would make you feel any better.

I'm not so sure it's just part of the grieving process. I think maybe Bella and Genesis are trying to comfort you. Perhaps it is part of the grieving process that has enabled you to be aware of it.