My George

I procrastinated in posting this or maybe it was that I just could not make myself do it. Then I realized that I really should. If it were any of your kitties, I’d like to know. Maybe I just feel like having a meltdown today. My baby boy, George, became ill with diarrhea about a month ago. He was acting normal in all other ways so I phoned the vet and he prescribed some general antibiotics which seemed to help. I noticed that he wasn’t feeling his best (not sleeping in his normal spot in our bedroom) but thought that the antibiotics might had been upsetting his stomach. The following weekend I noticed his appetite had decreased so I took him in Monday morning. They said his blood cell count was very low. I knew that wasn’t good news but the vet said it could be a variety of things. After a week of testing and back in on Friday for an ultrasound, he was full of cancer on the outside of his intestines and there were tumors forming on other organs as well. They told me it was the most aggressive form of cancer he could have gotten and at the most he had 30 days to live. I was crushed. How could my baby who looked a little older to me but still so healthy, be so sick and I didn’t see it? When we brought him home that night, he didn’t come upstairs to bed and he wouldn’t eat or drink no matter what I put in front of him. I knew he must have been in a great deal of pain. He even urinated three times on the rug he was lying on. We took him to our vet’s office the next morning to see what we could do for the pain, etc. She explained that we could try to give pain medication, appetite stimulants, fluids, cortisone shots etc. but there were no guarantees and he would have to come in every few days for fluids. In the end, we were just buying a few moments of time. We made the decision to say goodbye. Having one day to absorb it all didn't seem like enough time.

Knowing I don’t deal well with “remindersâ€, my husband came home and immediately put away his favorite toy (and old sock) took his litter box and put his food bowl away. It didn’t help. I could still see him so vividly that I would reach down to pet his head. I would go around the corner to his normal spots and call out to say hello out of habit. My house is so quiet now. I didn’t realize how many conversations we had during the day. I’d talk and he’d answer with a chirp or coo. Megan misses him and it was heartbreaking to watch her sniff the air and go looking for him. I can’t believe I have been able to go on with my daily life but somehow I have. I feel guilty about that, too. I apologize for my marathon post. Here are some random pictures of my baby boy:




Last Christmas enjoying his secret santa wrapping paper

Awww... thank you everyone. I think the shock is wearing off and it's crying weekend.

Heidi - Thanks for the laugh My hubby thanks you also. I swear that boy was possessed when he was young. That is the consequence of having to raise without a kitty Mom to keep him in line. He was a nut.

Thank you everyone. Your words really give me much comfort

Thank you. I am very sorry about your Boo, too

Thank you again, everyone. I think posting was rather therapeutic. I cried a lot this weekend but feel as if my heart has lightened up a bit.