Many of you know that I have been having an extremely difficult time as of late. It's been painful. Excruciating, really. But, I have some good news to start off the day. And, while I continue to struggle, I am going to choose to hold on to the light that is shining my way as opposed to living in the darkness.
I got a phone call this morning from the company I sent an application and my resume to a couple of weeks ago. I posted, in a very vague sense, shortly after I applied and talked about how meaningful this opportunity was to me. I'm still not in a place where I want to give specifics on the job, but I do have an interview next Tuesday at 3:00pm. I had all but given up hope -- despite knowing in my heart that this is the perfect job for me, the right job for me. I talked myself out of believing that they would want to hire me. But, a friend coaxed me into calling earlier this week and I found out that the position was still open and that the director was reviewing applications and resumes and would be calling people in for interviews later this week. And, today I got my call.
The job is an entry level position with a ton of room for growth -- including the potential for tuition reimbursement. The position is in the field I intend to work and it just feels right. And, I've worked with an adjunct to the company in the past. To start, the position is part-time only with evenings and weekends being the bulk of the time spent working. But, I can look past all of this because it's an amazing opportunity. Everyone I know says that this is the perfect job for me and it's true. This would be my "dream job." Even if there's grunt work involved, I know it is where I need to start in order to make my dream a reality. And, the personal experiences I have had do lend toward my having some natural traits and skills that would benefit me in such a position. In short, I'm really excited. This could be the start of a new life for me and I couldn't be more thrilled.
But, aside from that, I am still afraid of what could be. I would suspect that there are others who are interviewing for the same position. And, whose to say that they aren't more qualified? Over the last couple of years, my work history has been patchy. I've had some illnesses, some familial issues, and then some personal issues. I've always done my best at any job I've had and have been professional, courteous, kind, and willing to learn. But, my last job didn't end well (it was with PetSmart) and I left the position due to having had a bad winter illness-wise. I wrote a resignation letter and was professional about it, but I had preferred not to give 2 weeks notice (though I did offer it -- they declined). Never once did I receive written disciplinary action and I was always told that I was a good, reliable employee. But, yet, I wonder. Of course, there are always what if's when references and prior jobs are concerned, but I just want this job so badly that I can't help but worry.
Nevertheless, everyone I've shared the job prospect with have said how right it would be for me. And, truth be told, I know it's where I'm meant to be. I have personal experience and have the professional experience necessary (though none specifically is required). I can do the job and, in my heart, I know I can do it well. It feels more than right. It feels perfect on every level. I can picture myself there. I know I am a professional individual and can present myself well. And, I know that I interview quite well. I want to believe that I will get the job, but, with everything else going on in my life, I find myself doubting that anyone would want to hire me. What makes me so special? I know that is the wrong attitude and I am working on it and truly believe I will be offered the position. I do believe that and have hope for it. I just need now to turn it over and trust...
So, can I please ask for continued vibes that I get my "dream job?" In between now and Tuesday I am going to work on my confidence. And, I'm going to let go of my fears and move into a place of trust and acceptance. I know I am just as worthy and deserving as anyone else. And, I believe that this is where God wants me to be. So, for now, I trust. But, the vibes couldn't hurt either .
I got a phone call this morning from the company I sent an application and my resume to a couple of weeks ago. I posted, in a very vague sense, shortly after I applied and talked about how meaningful this opportunity was to me. I'm still not in a place where I want to give specifics on the job, but I do have an interview next Tuesday at 3:00pm. I had all but given up hope -- despite knowing in my heart that this is the perfect job for me, the right job for me. I talked myself out of believing that they would want to hire me. But, a friend coaxed me into calling earlier this week and I found out that the position was still open and that the director was reviewing applications and resumes and would be calling people in for interviews later this week. And, today I got my call.
The job is an entry level position with a ton of room for growth -- including the potential for tuition reimbursement. The position is in the field I intend to work and it just feels right. And, I've worked with an adjunct to the company in the past. To start, the position is part-time only with evenings and weekends being the bulk of the time spent working. But, I can look past all of this because it's an amazing opportunity. Everyone I know says that this is the perfect job for me and it's true. This would be my "dream job." Even if there's grunt work involved, I know it is where I need to start in order to make my dream a reality. And, the personal experiences I have had do lend toward my having some natural traits and skills that would benefit me in such a position. In short, I'm really excited. This could be the start of a new life for me and I couldn't be more thrilled.
But, aside from that, I am still afraid of what could be. I would suspect that there are others who are interviewing for the same position. And, whose to say that they aren't more qualified? Over the last couple of years, my work history has been patchy. I've had some illnesses, some familial issues, and then some personal issues. I've always done my best at any job I've had and have been professional, courteous, kind, and willing to learn. But, my last job didn't end well (it was with PetSmart) and I left the position due to having had a bad winter illness-wise. I wrote a resignation letter and was professional about it, but I had preferred not to give 2 weeks notice (though I did offer it -- they declined). Never once did I receive written disciplinary action and I was always told that I was a good, reliable employee. But, yet, I wonder. Of course, there are always what if's when references and prior jobs are concerned, but I just want this job so badly that I can't help but worry.
Nevertheless, everyone I've shared the job prospect with have said how right it would be for me. And, truth be told, I know it's where I'm meant to be. I have personal experience and have the professional experience necessary (though none specifically is required). I can do the job and, in my heart, I know I can do it well. It feels more than right. It feels perfect on every level. I can picture myself there. I know I am a professional individual and can present myself well. And, I know that I interview quite well. I want to believe that I will get the job, but, with everything else going on in my life, I find myself doubting that anyone would want to hire me. What makes me so special? I know that is the wrong attitude and I am working on it and truly believe I will be offered the position. I do believe that and have hope for it. I just need now to turn it over and trust...
So, can I please ask for continued vibes that I get my "dream job?" In between now and Tuesday I am going to work on my confidence. And, I'm going to let go of my fears and move into a place of trust and acceptance. I know I am just as worthy and deserving as anyone else. And, I believe that this is where God wants me to be. So, for now, I trust. But, the vibes couldn't hurt either .
