Male vs Female cats

What are your responses to prospective kitten buyers who want a male because, "they are more affectionate'"

So far, I have one whole male, one neutered male, and three whole females. Two of the whole females are purr monsters and must be on my lap or dropping toys on my feet to fetch, and one female is skittish. The two males are both affectionate as well. I have not seen any difference between the males and females so far.

I had a visitor, who was adamant about wanting a male, come visit me and then tell me, "well I'd want a female if she'd be like that one."

I think it just depends on the individual naturre of the cat, I ahve girl and boy kitties and they can all be as grumpy/nice as each other.x

I really used to think that neutered male cats were more affectionate. I was young and didn't know any better. Now I see no difference. It's up to the nature of the individual cat. Now,when I fall in love with a kitty--the sex is the last thing I ask about, although being spayed or neutered IS important.

I've had both males and females (purebred and not). In all most every case, my males were much more outgoing and loving then any of the females. Whether spayed or not, they tended to only like a few people or other cats in the house.

Showing wise I only had one female (my first breeding rex) that actually liked showing - none of the others did. And except for one male, all of them made lot better show cats.

I actually do recommend males (neutered) over females to anyone looking for a pet.

Those that say "it makes no difference" haven't had enough cats There is a difference. This is why I won't buy or show any more females. If given the choice I'll take a male over a female any day.

Makes no difference with my cats. I've got 5 girls, 2 boys at the moment and all are equally friendly, cuddly, lap sitters.

My sister has 7 boys and 1 girl. The girl is most friendly, purry, lap cat of the lot.

The sookiest of my litter was a girl, she always had to be sitting on me, or tucked into my shirt

Regards to showing my girls have been much better than the boys, another breeder said the same thing on another forum recently. I think it just depends on the individual cat.

i think males are more affectinate, Sooty certainly shows you more attention than Flash and when Smooch isnt being horrible he can be such a little love bug

Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45

Those that say "it makes no difference" haven't had enough cats

There is a difference. This is why I won't buy or show any more females. If given the choice I'll take a male over a female any day.

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Honestly, I appreciate your opinion as much as anyone's but this comment is a bit jarring. I am 40 years old and between my family and myself, we've had over 14 cats. In my comments above I was just mentioning my current cats, but over the years we have noticed no difference between the males and females. Actually, the two males who were a part of our lives the longest, 'old puss' and my deceased cat, Bonkers, were the least affectionate cats I have ever met. I loved them, but they could care less if they were pet or not pet daily.

I've had both, and have not found one or the other to be more affectionate. Some of my males are more friendly than others, same with the females. Right now I have 4 boys and 3 girls. One of the girls Harley is the most outgoing--very friendly with people/dogs/cats (even strangers) and she is the only one I am still showing regularly because almost all the others I have taken to shows were either shy/nervous (two of her male littermates), or stopped enjoying it and started getting hissy (my slightly older male Church and Maine Coon female). Harley's brother Spot is very sweet and laid back and he did not mind shows but he just didn't get picked by the judges (probably because of his extra weight.)
Several of the cats I've had were not especially affectionate but not standoffish either. They like to be petted but just aren't lap cats.

With feral cats, gender would affect behavior for survival of the species reasons.
My personal experience with domestic cats is that gender is irrelevant.

Well maybe the males just tend to take better to me - I'm being honest here - I've found a lot of difference over the years. I've raised male and female kittens in the same way; lots of attention, cuddling, etc. And yet the boys turn out more friendly.

Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45

Well maybe the males just tend to take better to me - I'm being honest here - I've found a lot of difference over the years. I've raised male and female kittens in the same way; lots of attention, cuddling, etc. And yet the boys turn out more friendly.

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My boys are always a lot friendlier too - and let's just say I've had more then 14 kittens, each year, for the last 15 years

I'm another one who has had cats of BOTH sexes my entire life and doesn't think sex has anything to do with how affectionate the cat is. Cats are all individuals. I have had incredibly affectionate females AND incredibly affectionate males and on the other hand have had very standoffish cats of both sexes. Both of my females are as sweet and affectionate as can be. The only reason I have more males is because Nova came with Dana and Azizi was SUPPOSED to be a female.

One of my fosters, Pria, is one of the most loving cats I have ever known. In fact I have had a LOT of female fosters who were nothing BUT love.

My girl is very friendly and very very very sweet/affectionate to all. I think the individual cat matters more than what sex the cat is, each one is an individual. That seems silly to me to say all boys are sweeter. Or all females are sweeter.

Originally Posted by GoldenKitty45

Those that say "it makes no difference" haven't had enough cats

There is a difference. This is why I won't buy or show any more females. If given the choice I'll take a male over a female any day.

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Can't agree with you. Every cat is an individual. Some are sweet and affectionate some are stand offish and everything in between. Some are male, some are female. I have lived with cats all my life, and have five waiting for me, so far, at the Bridge. (I imagine my girlhood cats are at my mother's Bridge )

There are exceptions to every "rule", and as for males being sweeter, there are many many exceptions to that one.

For my house Males are more affectionate as most people see it /// they like cuddles and being hugged and carried ... My female s currently are semi feral and thus only affectionate truely with me ... One female greets all visitors but say s hi and bye( she also wanted the vet to call her a dog )

Originally Posted by sharky

For my house Males are more affectionate as most people see it /// they like cuddles and being hugged and carried ... My female s currently are semi feral and thus only affectionate truely with me ... One female greets all visitors but say s hi and bye( she also wanted the vet to call her a dog

)

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Well, see? It just goes to show, each has to be judged as an individual case. We can't compare your male house cats with the female semi feral cats as far as how affectionate they are. It's "apples and oranges" as the saying goes. A feral kitty is not going to be showing affection to anything human regardless of gender.

By the way, I didn't vote in the poll because I didn't see a choice for what I think, which is, it depends on the cat.

Originally Posted by WellingtonCats

My boys are always a lot friendlier too - and let's just say I've had more then 14 kittens, each year, for the last 15 years

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When I said 14 cats, I meant 14 cats grown from kitten to adulthood and then through their subsequent passing on. I have only been breeding three years and I have produced 9 so far. I can tell generalities with kittens, but I think I'd have to know a cat throughout it's life to know if they were genuinely affectionate or non-affectionate.

I do appreciate your opinion based on experience though.

My family and I have had a series of altered females. I like them. Midori is more of a cuddle bug/lap cat while Gracie had and Aya has more diva-ish tendencies. I'd personally lean toward getting another girl as I also have a weakness for tricolor kitties (bring on the tortitude!).

I should have added 'depends on cat' to the poll, but that wasn't really the point. Enough potential kitten buyers have approached me with the statement that they'd rather have a neutered male that it has made an impression. 'Depends on the cat' is really the same as 'there is no difference' when it comes to answering that question. I tell them that all cats are different, and that I will do my best to match the personality of the kitten to the needs of the new home.

There are other assumptions that I hear from buyers as well, such as:

Kittens should go to new homes at 8 weeks so they'll bond with people (false)

Kittens should be placed as singles or they'll bond with each other rather than their new human family (haven't researched that one enough, but in my experience cats we've owned have bonded with us whether single or double.. cats seem to have a different relationship with each than they do with their people)

Cats should never be fed soft food because it rots their teet. (false)

As a producer of show cats, I do have to deal with a lot of pet kitten buyers as well. I just want to ensure that I am gathering the best knowledge that I can so that I can pass it on to my buyers.