wedding attire etiquette

The Beau and I are going to his co-workers (and boss' son and stb daughter-in-law) wedding on the 3rd and I think I have my outfit decided but the Beau is clueless and not being much help and of course I have been given the task of dressing him... men...seesh!
Usually I'd go by the invitation, but because the Beau is in China we did not receive one. (and we were completely fine with this! No use to send it really!)
A bit about the wedding:
Time: 4PM-10:30ish
Weather: Sunny and high in the 90's (probably humid as usual...)
Location: Upscale lodge
Dont know if its inside or outside yet. The Beau is finding out
Families are both pretty upperclass but down to earth.
The bride and groom are both in their low-mid 20's

For me: I am thinking about wearing this dress:

I know it has a white background but I feel the brown and turquoise are the main focus and it shouldn't draw attention away from the bride. But what do you think? I plan on wearing white kitten heel sandal's that have turquoise stones on them. Very dressy, very cute! It is strapless, but since its not at a church and not a very religious group I didnt think that would be a problem. But I can look for a white or brown bolero to go over if I need to.
For him:
I was thinking light weight khaki dress pants with a long sleeve button up and tie. But should he wear a sports jacket? If so what color should he go with? He does not have a suit that fits all that well at the moment and I didnt think a suit would be the best for an afternoon wedding.
I dont have a lot of practice dressing men for things like this! LOL! Any suggestions?

Well, I'm not the most fashion savvy girl on the planet, but I do have opinions. So--your dress is lovely! Unless you plan on being cold at some point, and you won't be in a church setting, I wouldn't bother with a bolero.
As for the Beau, I think I'd do without the sports coat. Whenever I see a couple where the woman is wearing strapless and a man is wearing a coat, I always wonder he's so over-dressed. Plus, if you're expecting hot and humid weather the poor man will just suffer.
Will his shirt match either the brown or turquoise in your dress?

I don't know anything about wedding dress etiquette.

But I do know from Miss Manners, is that there are 2 main rules:

1. No wearing all white;
2. Don't upstage the bride.



That being said, you should wear whatever you feel comfortable wearing to a dressy function.

It's summer, so strapless should be fine. Carry a shawl with you in case you get chilly.

The colours of your dress are fine, too. Some white in a dress is ok according to the above from Miss Manners. It's the all white you want to stay away from.

For your husband, wearing a light weight suit would be ok. It's summer and it's hot. He can always take off his jacket and tie when inside at the reception. Every wedding that I've ever attended I've seen the men do that, including the groom.

Your dress is lovely. I think your DH should wear a very light suit with a tie. At the least, he should probably show up wearing his jacket. And then, see what the other men do; if they take their jackets off, he can do so as well.

We just came back from an outdoor wedding in VA. It was hot and humid with temps in the lower 90s. All the men had jackets and ties on for the wedding, but afterward, everybody took them back off for the dinner and reception.

(Oh, and if the wedding and reception are inside, you may want to take along a shawl, just in case the AC is working overtime. You never know.)

Just don't let him wear bermuda shorts and flip flops! Seriously many years ago I attended an afternoon CHURCH wedding with an outdoor casual reception. One of the male guests attended the wedding IN CHURCH dressed in bermuda shorts and flip-flops. I was appalled!

thanks guys! So relieve to hear my dress should be fine! I highly doubt I will worry about taking anything to wear over it!
As for the Beau we will be getting him a sports jacket I believe. And I may make him go to Ross and pick out a turquoise shirt so we can match And he isnt allowed to take his tie off! I never see him in one and have a thing for them lol!

I love that dress, it's very pretty. Like others have said, as long as you are not in all white you'll be fine. I went to a friend's wedding once (it was the second marriage for both of them - they both had kids from the previous marriages and the kids were in the wedding party). They had an outdoor wedding with a BBQ reception, the groom and his son were in shorts and polos, I wore a dress to the wedding and felt overdressed!!

Weddings make me laugh sometimes, because I've been to ones where the brides want everything to be picture perfect, and I've been to ones where they only care that their guests have a good time. Sometimes you just never know...

Originally Posted by Dusty's Mom

Just don't let him wear bermuda shorts and flip flops! Seriously many years ago I attended an afternoon CHURCH wedding with an outdoor casual reception. One of the male guests attended the wedding IN CHURCH dressed in bermuda shorts and flip-flops. I was appalled!

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I agree!

I almost said I was there. But the wedding I went to was not in a church. It was a relative of mine that was the bride and one of guests showed up in shorts and flip-flops. He did wear a dress shirt and tie.

His friends, including the groom thought it was funny. But I thought it was absolutely disrespectful. Eight years later I still refer to him as "that jerk".

Your dress is fine for that wedding.

My DH usually wears slacks with a button up dress shirt with a tie but usually not with a jacket. (Or he brings the jacket with him but doesn't wear it)

Another not too fashion-wise one here, but it looks fine to me. Last wedding I was at, I wore pressed, starched jeans, a nice top and paddock boots and carried a ball cap because it was horrible hot and the weedding was outside and very casual.

Your dress is beautiful. It's not all white, so that color shouldn't be a problem.

Love your dress! Everyone gave you good advice. I'd bring a shrug just in case; and your SO can bring his coat along. He can always take it off. (I always have to dress my DH too.)

I think it's a beautiful dress. I don't think the white will matter; brown seems to be the main color.

thank you guys for the lovely comments on my dress! I got it for easter one year and froze my bum off in it! And its been in the closet ever since!
I think we have decided to go try to find him a nice blazer hopefully in a chocolate brown to match my dress and I think I am going to make him get a turquoise shirt too and hopefully a nice printed tie to match. He has yet to be informed he isnt allowed to take his tie off lol

I will be sure to take pictures of me and the Beau dressed up

I have no clue about wedding dressing etiquette. But your dress is gorgeous!

The 2 weddings I went to last year werent the greatest there was a mix of hussied up hoochie mamas trolling for their fling for the night and casual nicely dressed men and women. BF and I went with the casual look since both weddings were outside at a golf course. We both wore nice jeans and dress shirts, dark jeans since they look nicer than lighter jeans.

1: Don't wear white (of course)2: Don't wear all black...The first wedding I went to with a certain someone, I wore a gorgeous black halter dress, Mariln Monroeish, and anyone that didnt like the bride congratulated me in getting into the funeral vibe hahaAlso, its better to be a little more dressy than underdressed.good luck!

That dress is perfect!!. Do you wear fascinators or hats to weddings like we do in the UK?

I would definitely get your partner to wear a jacket as well

Susan, what's a fascinator (forgive my ignorance )?

I can say that hats are not real popular at weddings I've attended, although in the US, there can be different trends by region. I think hats are still pretty popular among Southern women...

Originally Posted by Mystik Spiral

Susan, what's a fascinator (forgive my ignorance

)?

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This is one. But you can get them smaller. They can fit on your head as a thin headband or as a combe. I've got 3 as a combe like the one below, because unlike hats that give you "Hat hair", these don't

thank you guys! I tried to find a fascinator today but no luck! I may have some white and turquoise hair clips that are roses but I dont think I have them here!

We got Gary a light gray very nice sports coat and he is wearing a white shirt and black pants and a turquoise tie. We tried to find a nice khaki or chocolate sport coat so we would much but didnt have any luck! Oh well! I think we will still look nice! Pictures will come tomorrow