The human memory is a funny thing

I'm just curious about something. Is it normal to walk by objects everyday for weeks or months without actually noticing them? For example, I think I could walk by any object (tools, chairs, banners statues, etc.) everyday for six months without ever actually noticing it. If one day, the object was no longer there, I suspect that I probably wouldn't even notice that it was gone. Is that normal? What does this say about me?

This question actually came about because a relative wants me to testify in court that I saw items on his property prior to them being stolen. I told him I don't recall seeing those items and now he's mad at me because he desperately needs me to testify. I know I saw those items, I just don't remember seeing them. I think a huge part of it is that I didn't know what those items were when I saw them, therefore I don't remember them. Maybe it's me, but I think it's harder to remember something you saw when you don't even know what it is.

How do you learn? Do you learn by hearing things or doing? This would explain why you don't notice things around you as much.

I'm a very visual person, a visual learner, and if anything is even slightly moved in my home or on my property - I notice it quickly.


If you don't trust your visual memory I honestly don't see how you could testify without the worry that you'd just be saying what your relative wanted you to say.

Originally Posted by strange_wings

I'm a very visual person, a visual learner, and if anything is even slightly moved in my home or on my property - I notice it quickly.

Click to expand...

Thats me, i know of something is missing, moved, changed its a feeling i get then i look round the room

How many items is he asking you to try to remember? I would be honest and say Look I remember this n that but not yadayada. I'm not gonna make stuff up. I wish my memory was sharper but what I can recall is what I can say period

There was a brain piece on tv where a half dozen drivers were pulled over and asked "What were the last 3 traffic signs you saw?" All of them were wronggggggg and embarassed. In their defense, the signs were all local (suburban) and sizewise not huge but still - We are obligated by law to heed them when we're behind the wheel. Just a side note --but related to human memory and what we choose to notice. I'll be honest, I think I would've been the same as those half dozen drivers If one of the signs was "School Crossing" my brain would've asked: See any kids? No? Good! Gas pedal. ...all in a split second ... but see, something like that would leave my memory as fast as it came in.

^I have the sign layout of all signs completely memorized for all the streets I drive in the town I live in. I rely heavily on visual land marks to remember where things are located and find my way around. I'm also highly observant driving around because most people let their cats outside in this town - I know where a lot of cats live and to look out for them... especially the night before trash pickup.

Originally Posted by -_aj_-

Thats me, i know of something is missing, moved, changed its a feeling i get then i look round the room

Click to expand...

A few years ago I had 6 cds sitting on my desk (had just purchased them). I had been away most of that day but when I came home I noticed upon sitting at my desk that the cd order was different. It honestly startled my DH that I noticed this and noticed it so quickly - I had asked him right away "what were you doing with my cds?".

My weak area is auditory. I may hear what you say, but I don't always process all of it or even remember it. I usually have to read something to understand it (instructions, books, song lyrics, etc).
People just learn and remember differently - which is really a pain when someone expects you to remember something in an area you're very weak in. "What did I say earlier?" Me "....um".

Noticing something is different than having memory of it. We are bombarded with far too many images every moment of the day to "see" them all. Our brains are very selective about what we notice and what we don't; if we didn't do that we would be overwhelmed.

Magicians rely on this fact - they bring our focus where they want it, and we don't even notice the stuff going on around and in the background. Next time you see someone doing magic tricks, focus on what's going on around instead of on the hands or prop... very revealing.

Memory is a tricky thing, too, once we've "seen" something. We don't always focus on the same things other people do.

Hope you aren't dragged to court, but you will have to tell the truth anyway. How can you be sure you saw the items if you don't remember seeing them? I don't see how your testimony could help. It sounds like you didn't notice them - we "see" only a fraction of what is around us.

Here's a quiz on selective attention. Just follow the instructions.

^ I don't understand what's so difficult about seeing the person in the gorilla suit? He/she even comes close to tripping/running into the one guy in the white t-shirt. But then... I don't remember all that was just said in the video I watched. Again, I'm a visual person, not an auditory one.

Nope, I did not see the gorilla but at least I got the number of passes right.

I can drive by a house a thousand times, and then suddenly notice a tree in the front yard that I never saw before. That always freaks me out.

I have great difficulty following other people's driving directions, even written down, but I give great directions myself, so I've been told.

I have terrible listening skills.

Speaking of memory:

This morning I took the toe nail clippers out of the drawer I keep them in to clip my toe nails. About four hours later, I remembered doing that part, but my toe nails are not clipped and I have no idea where the clippers are. I have looked and looked and looked, and cannot think what I did after getting those clippers that distracted me.

It's very frustrating because those are excellent clippers and I would hate to have to try to replace them.

Back on topic, Lilblu I am sorry you are being put in such a difficult position. I would think your relative would prefer you NOT testify, since you can not say with confidence that you saw those items.

Originally Posted by otto

Back on topic, Lilblu I am sorry you are being put in such a difficult position. I would think your relative would prefer you NOT testify, since you can not say with confidence that you saw those items.

Click to expand...

Or at the very least talk to the relative's lawyer and tell them you have absolutely no memory of it and don't wish to lie. ..I wonder how many people do, though?


As for that vid..
My memory records everything as snap shots that I can mentally pull back out and look at.

There were three of each - three women, three guys, three in white, three in black shirts, Three elevators, too!
Two S's on the walls between the elevators - plus a plastic thing on the wall (for holding papers) next to the elevator on the right.
The guy in the white sweatshirt had on brown shoes - he had a dark tag on the back of his sweat shirt but the vid quality was too low to tell if his shirt was inside out. The girl in all black wore black shoes (her tag was out, too. She also waves at one point), and the guy in all black (with the frosted tips on his hair) had on white shoes - which I always think looks silly.
The rest had on light blue jeans and white sneakers. One of the girls (the one in the black shirt and jeans) had medium brown hair. Everyone else had much darker hair. The woman in the fitted white shirt looks a bit like someone I went to school with back in '96-97 .
The person in the gorilla suit was fairly tall and skinny, too.

How many details about their appearance and the setting can you recall?

I did see the gorilla but I did not notice all of those details... just 3 in white and 3 in black and the elevators.

My memory is not the best. I do not always notice things around me, but some things I do. I guess Im selective in what I notice around me. Sometimes, I cant remember facts about certain things. Dates and length of time Im not good with.

I think it's definitely normal not to notice things especially given how it's not your house. If I don't know what something is and I don't need it, I don't make a mental note of it being there even if I see it, so I forget it.

I wouldn't testify about the things being there if I didn't remember, because if you sound insecure, the lawyers pick up on it and question the heck out of you, it may do more damage to the case than good.

Originally Posted by SwampWitch

Here's a quiz on selective attention. Just follow the instructions.

Click to expand...

NO Freaking way there was a gorilla the first time IT's a LIE

Originally Posted by Pami

My memory is not the best. I do not always notice things around me, but some things I do. I guess Im selective in what I notice around me. Sometimes, I cant remember facts about certain things. Dates and length of time Im not good with.

Click to expand...

I thought it was going to be harder than "did you see the person in gorilla suit" so I was looking at everything.
Other parts of my memory do fail - I'm terrible at math and can't really do any sort of mental arithmetic. And for some very odd reason I have a lot of difficulty remembering faces. Maybe it's because I don't usually look at them and certainly never at a person's eyes (I stare above their forehead at their hair). I have poor concept of time.

Originally Posted by strange_wings

As for that vid..
My memory records everything as snap shots that I can mentally pull back out and look at.

Click to expand...

That's interesting because that's actually how my hearing works though not my vision- which is why sometimes I react to what people tell me with a delay, if I'm focused on something else I just store what they told me and then pull it back and process it when my mind is not so busy anymore
And if it's a joke people get the idea that I don't get the joke until that much later When in fact I didn't even know what they told me until that much later.

I wonder why some can see the gorilla and some cant.... he interrupted me trying to count, so I saw him very clearly.

the book store where i worked had a poster of a book on the back door. it had been there for years. a customer came up one time and wanted to know if we had the book on the poster in stock. the other manager and i looked at each other because we didn't know what book he was talking about. we saw the poster every day but didn't see it.

one of my friend's husband would grow a moustache, beard and then shave it off. it always changed. she asked me one time: the last time you saw him (about a month ago) was he clean shaven, bearded or had a mostache? i couldn't rememember.

I learn by doing. I tend to forget a lot of what I hear. I remember things I see if I see them a lot or am somehow involved with them such as moving, cleaning, or working with them. Otherwise, I don't typically remember them. Although, now I'm wondering if part of that is due to my eyesight. I'm nearsighted and must wear my glasses to drive, watch tv, or go to a concert (if I want to actually see the person singing). Things are so much sharper when I wear my glasses but I normally don't wear them unless I need to. So I think that maybe I don't really look at stuff or remember it because I can't see it very clearly.

There must be something seriously wrong with me. On that selective attention test I couldn't even count the passes. As soon as they started passing the ball I got lost and couldn't even count. There were too many people and too much going on. I did see the gorilla.

The relative is only concerned with one item which is very expensive. There's no way he can replace it and unless someone can testify that they saw it, he's screwed. I'm not going to lie because in court, that's illegal. I just don't understand why he's so insistant that I saw and remember these items (there was more than one of them). He's getting mad at me because he thinks I'm lying to him to hurt his case.

I totally know where you're coming from. I can drive by an object 1000 times, then it changes, drive by another 1000 times and ask where the object went or when it was build and my mom will tell me 'oh, they tore that barn down 6 months ago' or 'they've been building that house for almost a year now' I've been oblivious the whole time

Originally Posted by ut0pia

NO Freaking way there was a gorilla the first time

IT's a LIE

Click to expand...

Hahahahaha! LOL!

<still giggling>