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Not wanting to be touched?

post #1 of 8
4/8/10 at 10:59am
Thread Starter 
I have a 9 month old kitten and he doesnt like it be touched or brushed. Whenever we try petting him or brushing him, he just runs away or crouches down to avoid our hands ... We have never been rough with him since he was born ..

Also, when he is laying down he sometimes allows us to pet his back, but when we go towards his stomach area it kicks us and trys to bite us.. We thought maybe because he got fixed a couple months ago and got a baaaaaddd infection and now he doesnt want anyone touching that area.

But we are still confused about petting and brushing in general, we dont know what to do or how to make him like it.
We need to brush him because he sheds a lot, but its almost impossible for us to brush him.. It requires me and my brother to do it

Advice ??
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post #2 of 8
4/8/10 at 11:05am
You could try what was recommended in killerapple's thread.

First off. Treat him as you would an under socialize cat that you have to accustom to petting. Take it slow and don't do anything thing he doesn't like. Gently give him just one or two pets and talk to him in a pleasant tone of voice - always talk to him throughout the day. Don't grab or restrain him.

Second, stop forcefully brushing him. That's just upsetting him and undoing everything you've worked at.
What do you use to brush him with? Often the problem is what's used. You may be able to gently work him into it by using a comb (start with a wide tooth one), then moving up to something like a zoom groom. The idea is to used something that will not pull fur and actually feels good.

I have one who hates to be comb/brushed, and he's long haired so I have to do it. After working with him we've reach an agreement - I can brush him up to twice a week, but he'll complain at me the entire time, and I have to keep any leg/butt brushing to a minimal as not to insult his delicate kitty sensitivities.

Treats and praise, lots of it.

I'm guessing he might be the orange kitten in your sig? How's his mother's behavior towards people?
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post #3 of 8
4/8/10 at 11:33am
Thread Starter 
Yeah we have been slowly trying to get him to like being brushed by giving him treats while we do it, that kind of helps.


His mother is the complete opposite!
She will come and sit ON you for attention, she looooovesss tummy rubs and heads scrubs
Brushing is her favorite thing to do, she does it herself! All we have to do is hold out the brush

Thats why we thought Peeko (the kitten) would of grown up to love being pet and brushed just as much as his monther does, but i guess he hasnt yet
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post #4 of 8
4/8/10 at 11:46am
How odd. Kittens usually learn acceptable behavior from their mother or other cats in the home. So yes, you'd think he'd like it more.

Just take it slow. He'll make some progress even if it doesn't seem like it.

I have one (who just came out of her spay surgery a few minutes ago) that does not like being picked up. She acts like we're trying to hurt her. Her siblings don't care. So to get her used to it I'll lift her up and only move her very short distances - ie from the floor to the table, then pet her while she stands on the table. It's very slowly working, but she won't accept being carried. Oh well, as long as I know I can grab her if needed.
Trying to catch her to put her in the carrier this morning, you would have thought she was fully feral. She nearly bit me but stopped herself. Again, her siblings and none of the cats in the home behave this way.

I can't tell you what goes through their heads most of the time to make them act afraid of something they shouldn't be.
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post #5 of 8
4/8/10 at 11:59am
Is this a behavoir that started after the infection? Or was the cat always like that? He may have associated being touched with pain.

My Sphynx did not like to be picked up and held when I first got her. She liked attention, just did not like to be held. I had come to the conclusion that she was picked up and held to recieve baths or have her eyes/ears cleaned. So I will pick her up snuggle her, pet her, and when she starts to act like she's had enough, put her down. She's becoming more tolerant of it, and starting to like being snuggled abit.
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post #6 of 8
4/9/10 at 5:51am
Thread Starter 
For the kitten it didnt start after the surgery, he never really liked being touched.
Another weird thing is that he doesnt mind being held like a baby in our arms

But we got the mother when she was about a year old and less than a month later she gave birth to Peeko .. She has never liked to be picked up, she always fights and scratches.. She is getting better because when i pick her up now she just stares at me wide eyed and is rock stiff... LOL its a start right?


Both my cats are so different
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post #7 of 8
4/9/10 at 9:33am
Quote:
Originally Posted by TashaaM View Post
She has never liked to be picked up, she always fights and scratches.. She is getting better because when i pick her up now she just stares at me wide eyed and is rock stiff... LOL its a start right?
Ah, there it is. So he has learned some of this from his mother. Cats watch everything, they pick up body language in other cats and even us. He somehow learned from his mother that he needs to be a bit leery of you - he can probably easily spot her anxiety when picked up.
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post #8 of 8
4/10/10 at 10:01am
Most cats experience some levels of "petting aggression" - which I like to think of as petting "overstimulation". Cats who are epileptic can have seizures from back stroking/spinal cord stimulation.

When cats are affectionate with each other they rub sides and keep prolonged grooming generally in the face/head/neck area. I find that touching cats in similar ways they touch each other helps. Stroke the side of the cat instead of the back - alternate sides - keep it brief and light. Prolong scratching/rubbing should keep to the head/neck/face areas.

Each cat can tolerate a different level of physical affection and has places they like and dislike to be touched. Many, many cats do not like belly rubs.

Humans and all primates are very physcally affectionate - often more affectionate than our dogs and cats. Don't take it personally.
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