Well, I wish I had not done that!

blueyedgirl5946

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We buried Speedboat on the hill out at the back of our three acres. This is the first time I have been out there to that part of the yard. Now I am crying. Maybe one day, I can go out there again, but it won't be soon. Maybe I was just not ready. My husband has said he intends to pour a concrete marker and put his name, birth and death dates on it. Whenever he does that, maybe I will go again, but not right now. Whenever I think I am better, then something like this reminds me how empty my heart feels in that place that belonged to Speedboat.
 

jennyr

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It is always difficult when we visit the grave, or somewhere that reminds us of one we have lost. I buried my Napoleon in a corner of my garden, and surrounded his headstone with white flowers and put a white cat statue there. Actually making his little garden was therapeutic after his death, but then I could not bear to even look at it for months. Now I love to go there, sit on a bench under a white rose I planted, and it is peaceful. It is so soon for you, but I am sure one day you will want to go there and think through all the memories, good and bad.
 
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blueyedgirl5946

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Thank you Jenny, in my heart, I know you are right. It is just hard getting from here to there. I wish I had known your Napoleon. He must have been a special cat for you to build such a beautiful garden there. We sure to love them, don't we.
 

farleyv

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Oh Barb, I guess it is too soon for you. I am sure you will come to the time when it will be a comfort. Just not yet.

On Spots first anniversary, it was too snowy to put a flower on her grave, so I drew a heart in the snow. And I cried too. So even one year and it still hurts.

Time. It takes time. That is what everyone says. Not much comfort, but I guess it's true.

Hopefully with spring coming, we will all be getting busy and maybe that will help. I've been where you are and the pain will start to turn around.
 
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