Hi all! We have a cat with really terrible behavior, and after a year of trying to get her to "warm up" to us, she shows almost no signs of improvement. My girlfriend is really tired of having a mean, inaffectionate cat and we recently got another kitten ("Jinx") who is truly the sweetest creature I have ever met! I'm worried about the new kitten becoming prey, because our older cat ("Bazzle") has him terrified
We have had Bazzle for a year now. She has never been very friendly. Since we first got her she has hated being touched, which was tough because when we first got her she was irresistably cute (see?!
). The only way you can pet her is to be extremely slow and let her sniff you first, and you can usually only pet her head once or twice before she runs off. If you touch her back she usually bites you. She usually doesn't instigate the aggression, although I can count at least a dozen times she has snuck up on my girlfriend and bit her legs. Most of the time she just steers clear of contact. When she was a kitty she would actually sleep on our bed, but still not let us touch her. Now she never sleeps with us.
At first when she would bite or claw us, or get into trouble, we would spray her with a water bottle. It did nothing but make her madder. So I started scolding her with a NO, not screaming but stern, and then putting her in our bathroom for about 5 minutes. It hasn't done a thing for her behavior, and she never gets the point - usually going back and doing whatever she was doing wrong over and over and over again. I've spent months being calm and consistent with my methods, even pampering her ridiculously trying to win her trust. I really think she is just scared all the time, but a year later I'm getting incredibly frustrated with her.
I get the impression that she likes us, because she will spend a lot of time in the same room as us, just not near us. When we come home after work she is always at the door (usually trying to run out in the hall), but she'll always rub up against our legs and purr a little bit. The second we go to pet her she runs five feet away and just stares at us though.
I'm concerned now more than ever though. When we brought the new kitten home Bazzle was horrified. She was hissing and went into instant agitated mode. She scared the bejeesus out of poor Jinx and the kitten whines for us whenever we leave the room, out of fear I expect. We have them sperated somewhat inconveniently in our apartment, and the couple times I have brought Jinx near Bazzle she hisses and completely freaks out. I expected her to be upset, but her behaviour has me really terrified for Jinx's safety and personality. Not only did Bazzle hiss and snarl at Jinx, but she full on attacked me when I got near her, and I have the wounds to prove it. Later that night I simply got within four feet of Bazzle and she went into a hissing, snarling fit.
Okay, I know this post is turning into a novel so I'll try and get to my point. Firstly, I want Bazzle to be a good cat. She has me so frustrated sometimes, I simply can't imagine feeding and loving this cat for its entire life, but at the same time having it attack me and run from me constantly.
Secondly, I am worried about our new kitten. Obviously her safety is the biggest concern, and even if Bazzle starts to act more normal around him, who is to say that Bazzle won't tweak out on Jinx if the kitty decides to play or just gets too close? Aside from his physical health, I don't want this cat becoming traumatized because he has to live his kitty life in fear of Bazzle; or even worse, picking up on Bazzle's behaviour. Right now this cat is truly the sweetest thing I've ever seen. We just picked him up two nights ago, and for an entire two hour drive it sat right between me and my girlfriend purring and letting us pet it. It sleeps in our bed, and whines when we leave the room. I woke up this morning with him snoozing on my legs and he started licking me and purring! It was wonderful! He's normal!
If you made it this far I thank you just for putting up with my rant. I'm really at wits end with this cat. I've read the forum FAQs and asked other catowners, and tried everything else under the sun except herbal or prescription treatments. Personally, giving my cat drugs is an absolute last resort, and in my mind a "cop out" more often than not.
I should mention that she isn't fixed yet. We are having her fixed within the next two weeks though. Some people have told me it completely changed their cat's behavior, and some have said it did absolutely nothing. I would be shocked and amazed to see Bazzle come back an affectionate cat, though.
As far as Bazzle is concerned, do you think there is hope? Is there anything else to try that doesn't cost tons of money? Are cats always this violent and angry towards newcomers? Will I ever get to live a normal life again with this ktty around?!
Thanks a ton to anyone who can lend a kind ear to my story, and maybe even a little help.
We have had Bazzle for a year now. She has never been very friendly. Since we first got her she has hated being touched, which was tough because when we first got her she was irresistably cute (see?!
At first when she would bite or claw us, or get into trouble, we would spray her with a water bottle. It did nothing but make her madder. So I started scolding her with a NO, not screaming but stern, and then putting her in our bathroom for about 5 minutes. It hasn't done a thing for her behavior, and she never gets the point - usually going back and doing whatever she was doing wrong over and over and over again. I've spent months being calm and consistent with my methods, even pampering her ridiculously trying to win her trust. I really think she is just scared all the time, but a year later I'm getting incredibly frustrated with her.
I get the impression that she likes us, because she will spend a lot of time in the same room as us, just not near us. When we come home after work she is always at the door (usually trying to run out in the hall), but she'll always rub up against our legs and purr a little bit. The second we go to pet her she runs five feet away and just stares at us though.
I'm concerned now more than ever though. When we brought the new kitten home Bazzle was horrified. She was hissing and went into instant agitated mode. She scared the bejeesus out of poor Jinx and the kitten whines for us whenever we leave the room, out of fear I expect. We have them sperated somewhat inconveniently in our apartment, and the couple times I have brought Jinx near Bazzle she hisses and completely freaks out. I expected her to be upset, but her behaviour has me really terrified for Jinx's safety and personality. Not only did Bazzle hiss and snarl at Jinx, but she full on attacked me when I got near her, and I have the wounds to prove it. Later that night I simply got within four feet of Bazzle and she went into a hissing, snarling fit.
Okay, I know this post is turning into a novel so I'll try and get to my point. Firstly, I want Bazzle to be a good cat. She has me so frustrated sometimes, I simply can't imagine feeding and loving this cat for its entire life, but at the same time having it attack me and run from me constantly.
Secondly, I am worried about our new kitten. Obviously her safety is the biggest concern, and even if Bazzle starts to act more normal around him, who is to say that Bazzle won't tweak out on Jinx if the kitty decides to play or just gets too close? Aside from his physical health, I don't want this cat becoming traumatized because he has to live his kitty life in fear of Bazzle; or even worse, picking up on Bazzle's behaviour. Right now this cat is truly the sweetest thing I've ever seen. We just picked him up two nights ago, and for an entire two hour drive it sat right between me and my girlfriend purring and letting us pet it. It sleeps in our bed, and whines when we leave the room. I woke up this morning with him snoozing on my legs and he started licking me and purring! It was wonderful! He's normal!
If you made it this far I thank you just for putting up with my rant. I'm really at wits end with this cat. I've read the forum FAQs and asked other catowners, and tried everything else under the sun except herbal or prescription treatments. Personally, giving my cat drugs is an absolute last resort, and in my mind a "cop out" more often than not.
I should mention that she isn't fixed yet. We are having her fixed within the next two weeks though. Some people have told me it completely changed their cat's behavior, and some have said it did absolutely nothing. I would be shocked and amazed to see Bazzle come back an affectionate cat, though.
As far as Bazzle is concerned, do you think there is hope? Is there anything else to try that doesn't cost tons of money? Are cats always this violent and angry towards newcomers? Will I ever get to live a normal life again with this ktty around?!
Thanks a ton to anyone who can lend a kind ear to my story, and maybe even a little help.