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I want a lap cat

post #1 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:00pm
Thread Starter 
I lost my Speedboat in January. He was my verbal, lapcat. I have two cats who are both very sweet. However they don't want to be held and petted. Does anyone have any suggestions how to make lap cats out of them.
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post #2 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:06pm
Aw, I'm sorry you're missing your lap cat.

How old are your other two? Some cats get cuddlier when they get a bit older.

Your other option is to adopt a new cat! A shelter could probably point you in the direction of a cat that likes to sit with people. I don't know what your other two would think of that, though!
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post #3 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:08pm
If you find out the secret pass it over here. Jack hates anything related to a loving touch. Pepper is only a lap sitter if you are on the couch or easy chair, in the bed she lays at your feet only.

Although I'd be willing to rent out Harley for anyone who likes a good lap cat. He's what we call the "obsessive lover". He is so in your face and has to lay right on your chest, you can't read a book or magazine. He sucks on your ear lobes and licks your nostrils.

Sometimes I'm glad the other two are the way they are to balance out Harley.

Leslie
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post #4 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:08pm
I think lap cats are born, not made!

My two are both lap cats - on their terms, of course! Squeak prefers hubby's lap, while Dusty is my cuddle kitty!
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post #5 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:15pm
Thread Starter 
Part of the problem is because I am missing Speedboat so bad. He was pts January 25th and we are still in shock. His favorite place in the whole world was in my lap and he talked back to us everytime we spoke to him. He would kiss me for his food. Muffin, the grey and white cat in my siggy is a male cat, ten years old. He purrs everytime you pick him up. He even purrs at the vets office when he gets a shot, but he does not want to be held. My other cat is a 6 or 7 year old finnicky female calico named Mattie. She was a stray and had already been spayed when she came up on my porch in 2006. The vet said then she was 2 to 3 yrs. old. I managed to rescue her and she has made a good pet. Neither of them meow much. But I love them and they are good pets.
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post #6 of 22
3/4/10 at 3:25pm
Your Mattie sounds like how we got Dusty in 2005. She was very cautious at first and ran away every time we got close, but once we hand fed her and petted her, she became the best lap cat ever, giving me lots of kisses and cuddles. I have a friend who adopted a stray, and she would never get close to her lap. They are all so different and unpredictable.

I think if there is room in your household for another pet, you adopt one at the shelter. I think the staff can guide you toward one who likes laps.

Good luck.

Speedboat
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post #7 of 22
3/4/10 at 4:41pm
Cats have their own ideas. Some never want to be lap cats but prefer to just stay close by. Nothing you can do to "make" them into lap cats.

I know with our Ocicats - as kittens they were willing to cuddle more; as adults they lay next to you but hate cuddling or being in your lap. Jack purrs his head off when you pet him but to sit in your lap? Heck no
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post #8 of 22
3/4/10 at 4:47pm
I have a sphynx on me right now.
My sisters Bengal that was pts Nov 20th was a lap cat and she is hoping the new Bengal will be also.
You can not make a lap cat out of one though.
My Coco who is 18 now was when she was younger.
Cleo and Wrinkles both are.
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post #9 of 22
3/4/10 at 6:21pm
I guess I'm a lucky one! All it takes to get Holland into my lap is me sitting on the couch + one sleepy kitty. She will not usually tolerate me picking her up, but if I sit on the couch, turn on the TV, and pretend she's not there... irresistible to her. Works like a charm.
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post #10 of 22
3/4/10 at 7:25pm
You can try bribing with treats. This will get a cat in your lap, but won't keep it there. If you can find something your kitty really loves, such as a massage, that can make them relax and hang around a little longer.

Some cats become lap cats when they get older or something in the household changes (new cat, new furniture, new home, etc), so don't give up on any current cats.

With 7 house cats, I have plenty of lap cats. Sho is DH's lap cat, but not mine. Tomas likes his snuggles, and tends to get clingy if the house gets chilly (there's an idea! ). Siri is just plain weird and clingy. Tanna and Blaan like to lay on/smoother me. Sherman has moods... they're a little creepy.
Blasa is the only one that is too insecure and reserved to ever come into my lap of her own choosing - I put her there and she does enjoy some pettings but always wants back down.
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post #11 of 22
3/4/10 at 8:16pm
You'll just have to adopt a snuggler

Lily would love to be a lap cat, but is too scared we might eat her or something. Stumpy loved hanging near by, but never sat in a lap. Smudge never liked laps but was hugely cuddly (and also hated being picked up), but after I had open heart surgery and had hubby home with me, and we spent close to a month mostly on the couch in winter watching movies, Smudge decided laps were pretty cool, and she's been a lap cat ever since. You just need to have open heart surgery - or adopt another cat...
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post #12 of 22
3/4/10 at 9:36pm
I know what you mean, Barb. My Micky who was pts a few weeks ago was my cuddley teddy bear! We would fall asleep and I'd have my arms around him and he loved that! He also talked a lot. Not meowing like my kittens do but like short clipped speech and it was so cute! I'm going to miss him forever because he was so special to me!

My kitten Midnight does not like being picked up at all! But if I'm on the couch with my laptop computer, he comes and lays right on top of it and then snuggles in so he can be right there. My other kitten Frankie used to like getting picked up and walked around but not lately. However he does jump on the couch and sit behind me on the pillow. The two of them don't mind cuddling with each other. But their personalities are so different, and we're all so new together, I think in my case we just need some time adjusting to each other.

I agree about adopting another one! I totally would do that but I live in a townhouse and we have a 2 pet limit, unfortunately. I'm on the board of directors with the association so I guess I should probably try to follow the rules?
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post #13 of 22
3/5/10 at 12:44am
Quote:
Originally Posted by strange_wings View Post

Some cats become lap cats when they get older
I agree with this. Penny is now a quasi lapcat meaning 3-4x a week and for less than 5 minutes. and always by her choice (of course ) When I first got her, she would avoid me like the plague because she was a feral kitten. Although once when she was much younger she fell asleep in my arms as my arms rested on my lap. It was a fluke thing for sure. She must have been tired.
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post #14 of 22
3/5/10 at 11:22am
Thread Starter 
I am just going to have to make myself satisfied with the cats I have. Hubby and I have talked and we both are in agreement we are not taking any more in for pets. It hurts too bad to lose them. We are both in our sixties and a kitten could live a long time. I think if I ever get catless here, I might would try fostering for PAWS.
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post #15 of 22
3/5/10 at 1:39pm
In some ways you are lucky, I have 5 that try to cram on my lap at once

You cannot sit down around here without a cat in your lap.
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post #16 of 22
3/5/10 at 2:30pm
There is a difference between being held and being in a lap. Some cats would be happy to curl up on you, but don't like to be held or touched at all while they are on you. Ootay (rb 5/09) was like that.

Mazy, unsocialized when she came here took about 3 years to be willing to get on me much at all. Now she will lie on me for hours, but she prefers my chest, right under my chin. So...As I lie on the couch at night with my live fur blanket (with massage) on me I have to straight arm my book over my head to read, since my chin is being forced to point to the ceiling.

Oh and...I must not touch her more than once every hour or so.

You might try putting a favorite blankie over your lap when you sit down. You also have to remember to be still for a while, cats hate to be disrupted, so a lot of moving and jumping up and down will discourage them.

Get yourself settled with something soft on your lap, and call the kitty, patting your lap. My cats can't resist when I pat my lap!
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post #17 of 22
3/5/10 at 2:35pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by blueyedgirl5946 View Post
I am just going to have to make myself satisfied with the cats I have. Hubby and I have talked and we both are in agreement we are not taking any more in for pets. It hurts too bad to lose them. We are both in our sixties and a kitten could live a long time. I think if I ever get catless here, I might would try fostering for PAWS.
You can foster yes, or adopt seniors. It does hurt to let them go, but I cannot imagine no cats in my life. I'm only (almost) 50, but I will not adopt any more kittens either. (unless I am Chosen of course).

My next adoption (not for a few years yet) I hope to be a pair, an older pair that would otherwise be separated. It breaks my heart so much when older pairs are dumped at shelters, and then separated, because the shelters think it's better for one at least to find a forever home. I don't agree with that, and I don't know how anyone could be selfish enough to do it, take one and not the other.

But back to you, yes it's only been a short time since you lost Speedboat. Grieving is a long process. I caught myself welling up over Ootay today, and it's been almost a year.

hugs and headbumps from me and mine xo
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post #18 of 22
3/5/10 at 3:48pm
Quote:
Originally Posted by otto View Post
You might try putting a favorite blankie over your lap when you sit down. You also have to remember to be still for a while, cats hate to be disrupted, so a lot of moving and jumping up and down will discourage them.
Holland cannot RESIST a fleece blanket!! I sit on the couch with a fleece and I know it's only a matter of time before she jumps up. She will sit in "lion-pose" for a while on my lap, looking around at her surroundings, but once she curls up I know she's ready to be petted. And petted. And petted.
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post #19 of 22
3/5/10 at 6:22pm
Give it time. We found that, after losing a cat, the others changed some of their behavior in ways that sort of "filled in" for the one we lost. When my husband lost his lap cat, one of our other three cats eventually took over that "job." And she does it very well, after never being interested in laps.

I hope that this happens for you!

On the other hand, I've found that the only way to soften the grieving process is to fall in love with another cat (or cats). I'm 50 and raising two kittens (I also have two teenage cats), and I'm sure I'll be adopting more cats, younger or older, in the future. When the time comes...
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post #20 of 22
3/6/10 at 6:55am
I have two lap cats. As soon as I hit the recliner, they are both on my lap. Try knitting with two full grown cats on your lap lol
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post #21 of 22
3/6/10 at 7:33am
I know of an orange kitten (about 14-14 wks) that is a total lap cat, cuddler, purring, snuggling head bumping love bug <3 and he needs a fur ever home
http://www.petfinder.com/petnote/dis...petid=15265109
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post #22 of 22
3/6/10 at 3:00pm
I'm sorry you are missing your lap kitty!

In my experience its a personality thing rather than something that can be trained.
My Aspen is a total lap kitty. Her ideal place to be is lying on top of me, the closer she can get the better! She's so squishy and lovey all the time.
Libby on the other hand is very much her own cat. If she sees you sitting down and she's "in the mood" she will jump up and snuggle a bit and let you pet her, but she's definitely only willing to do this on her own terms. She will be 4 this year and as she gets older she is getting way more cuddly, but still definitely on her own terms!
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