Help socializing my adopted stray

Thanks for rescuing this kitty.

Well, a lot of this article doesn't apply because Pokey's already out and about in the house, but it's still a good read because of the basic principle involved - scent swapping. http://www.thecatsite.com/Behavior/4...cing-Cats.html

At this point, the idea is to help Pokey associate Moonpie and Hambone with good things. I'd initially focus on Moonpie, because he wants to play. I'd rub Moonpie all over with a clean wash cloth, and put it under the dish you use to feed Pokey.

Do you play with Pokey in the evening when he's upstairs for the night? I'd recommend that - play helps relieve stress (and boredom ). When you're done (if you don't have a da Bird toy with either the mouse end or the feather end, I'd really recommend it!!!! ), place treats for Pokey down on another rag that smells like Moonpie (or Hambone). After a week or two, bring Moonpie upstairs in whatever room Pokey is in (make sure it has a door so no one can run away, and have a play session with the wand toy - obviously see how it goes and don't force it - but playing with one, then the other often works. Get them focused on the toy, not each other, and keep it short - then give them both treats - then take Moonpie out of the room and put him back downstairs. If it goes well, do it each night, moving the treats closer together, so they're eating together.

When you do the first supervised play session, praise each of them a lot - Moonpie just for playing and for focusing on the toy - same for Pokey - for not being scared. Praise them - WHAT good boys they are!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - for eating their treats together or for playing well or whatever. The idea is to encourage positive interactions, and getting Pokey to think having Moonpie around is great fun and means all kind of wonderful things.

Do they like catnip? Give a catnip toy to Moonpie. When he's done rubbing and drooling all over it, give it to Pokey that night. It'll smell like catnip - but it'll also smell like Moonpie.

Do they like being brushed? Brush Moonpie or Hambone - and then use that brush on Pokey.

Do you have Feliway spray? This is a hormone that mimics the friendly markers in cats' cheeks. It helps reduce stress. Spray it around the house - especially upstairs. Don't spray it near litter boxes or scratching posts (wrong scent for those areas), but otherwise it should help Pokey feel a little calmer.

You can also try Bach's Rescue Remedy - http://www.bachflower.com/Pets.htm

Put a few drops in his water dish upstairs - dab a little behind his ears, at the base of his tail and under his chin when you bring him in.

You can also try music for cats - harp music is particularly calming for them.

http://www.catfaeries.com/music-for-cats.html
http://www.musicmypet.com/

Do you have much vertical space for the kitties? Cats live in a 3D world, and being able to go "up" can also help relieve stress.

I know you let him out during the day - but having natural scratching posts (sturdy branches, or make one of your own out of a 4 x 4 natural wood - pine or something) available for Pokey (the other kitties will probably love them too) isn't a bad idea.

....but take the "reintroductions" slowly, swap scents, and focus on praise and positive interaction with food and play.

Sometimes it's just a matter of time. But working on the positives with praise and scents can help.