Harley hates my new boyfriend AND my new kiten

I live alone and Harley has been with me for almost a year now (almost her whole life!) and she's absolutely adorable with me. She plays, she purrs, she nuzzles...and she was like this with my ex-boyfriend, who was also around from the very first day I brought her home. Now, several months later, I'm dating someone new...and my shock was visible when I saw Harley hiss and growl for the very first time at the new man in my life. He's been around for months, but her hissing and hiding continues while he's here. The moment he leaves, she's fine again.

I thought Harley's behavior had something to do with being alone with me for so long, so I decided she needed feline companionship, and I brought home six week old Paxton to join our little family. Harley hasn't tried to hurt little Paxxie, but she continues to hiss and growl at her, which doesn't faze Paxton in the least. She just sits there and ***** her head at Harley like she's the funniest thing she's ever seen. I don't know what to do or how to make things easier for Harley, Paxxie, my new boyfriend, OR myself! Please, any advice would be wonderful...I'm ready to pull my hair out!

Triskit

Welcome triskit! That must be so frustrating Does your boyfriend touch any other animals when he is not around you? Maybe your kitty smells something odd on him

Did you introduce your new kitty gradually to Harley? It makes all the difference in the world!

I'm sure someone else will have some good advice for you. Good luck!

Thanks for your response, Sicy! It helps to share my frustrations! Anyway, my boyfriend doesn't really handle a lot of animals while he's not here. He does smoke though, and even though he doesn't do it in the apartment, I thought maybe Harley could smell it on him...would this cause her hissing? She also bit him yesterday!

To make matters worse, Paxton popped her little cream colored head out of my bag the first night I brought her home and Harley spotted her before I could slip her into another room. Now I'm not sure how to go about the gradual transitioning. In all fairness to Harley, it's only been a couple days, so I'm hoping to right the situation before it gets worse!

Triskit

Originally posted by Triskit
... I saw Harley hiss and growl for the very first time at the new man in my life. He's been around for months, but her hissing and hiding continues while he's here. The moment he leaves, she's fine again.

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LOL I had the same problem once. As it turned out, my cat was just a better judge of character than me.

Hope your story has a better ending, though.

If you boyfriend would allow it, you might mist him lightly with your regular perfume. Not to heavy, just enough to neutralize his smell and make him smell more like you.

Seagull, I know what you mean, when I was single and dating, my one cat Sundancer did not like my new boyfriend. I tried everything I could to get them to get along. Turned out, he was not a very nice person after all. I should of listened to my cat!

Originally posted by Triskit
He does smoke though, and even though he doesn't do it in the apartment, I thought maybe Harley could smell it on him...would this cause her hissing?

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I dunno, I smoke and Zoey loves me LOL

Thanks for all your advice...I'm willing to try anything at this point. LOL But I think in the meantime I'm going to try and figure out how on earth I can post a pic as my signature! LOL

Triskit