A really embarrassing situation for me...

As some of you may know, I recently (a few months) moved from Washington back to Michigan to take up residence with my grandparents for a while so we can get back on our feet.

Of course I come home to tons of drama, mostly due to the divorce of my uncle and his wife, the birth of his 2 twin babies from the woman he was seeing on the side, and the fact that they dumped 2 of their animals on my grandparents.

These two animals are a fairly large dog and a sweet little bunny. The reasoning behind this was so that my other cousins from his original marriage wouldn't have to completely "give up" their pets.

At first I thought this would be an excellent change from the destitute ways they were living in, with Penny (the dog) being locked in the small laundry room all day and the rabbit just having run of the house with two children terrorizing it all day...

But I've come to realize that nobody here cares about them either... Penny spends all of her days leashed to the coffee table in the living room. I understand that my Papa (great grandpa) is about to turn 90 years old and that it could be DEVASTATING if that dog jumped up on him, but that's all the more reason that it's time to rehome her.

Why don't they rehome her? Well one..because of the children, and two..because my Aunt (who is 34 years old and living here) wont allow it because she "loves" Penny...Although they never go for walks and all I ever hear her do is yell "SHUT UP" at her...

I am CONSTANTLY on her a** about the rabbit too, his name is Oreo, and she NEVER feeds him. I don't even know how this bunny is still alive or how he survived before we moved here. At first I didn't worry about it. I know that makes me a horrible person, but my opinion was... "It's not my responsibility, and if Oreo dies then Amy will have to answer to the kids" but as time went on I realized that she was just waiting for it to die...and that if it died, they would probably blame it on me. Due to the fact that I said "I'm not feeding it because it's not my bunny..." and my grandmother got kind of mad at me...

At one point I saw that it had gone at LEAST a week without food or fresh water and I literally cried my eyes out, feeling very guilty for not ever caring. I made cody go out and buy a bag of rabit food and I have been feeding and watering him since then on a daily basis. I still absolutely refuse to clean his cage because I feel that Amy should have SOME responsibility for this animal.... But we even butt heads on THAT one small chore... When 2 weeks has gone by and I can't even BREATHE in the basement because the stench is so bad and she says "I'm SORRY that I have to work and I'm SICK and TIRED..." She literally works 4 days out of the week at most, usually mornings, and I'll be damned if she's sick every time I mention it...

She's just incredibly lazy and it infuriorates me... I can't imagine being this rabit sitting in those noxious fumes for weeks on end.


And, maybe I am wrong, but I told Grandpa that I would take over ALL OF THE RESPONSIBILITIES, if he would give over the rabit to me. I have always wanted a bunny... But he refuses to give it away, even though it's in the basement and the kids never even visit it anymore... It's like hes not even phased because he never goes into the basement and has to smell it or watch it suffer. To me it's like locking your kid in the basement and waiting for them to die...



I know this post is becomming insanely huge but I just can't stop myself from ranting... I have no control over anything in this house, I understand that I'm "just a guest" but I'm at the point where I'm about to throw a HUGE FIT if they don't start taking care of these animals.

Penny gets food and water every day and let out, but the last time she was groomed was probably never, and her claws are getting so long that they look like they are getting painful. I even went out and researched a groomer for them when Amy said "It's too expensive, she's too big and they charge by weight" so when I went to Petsmart they said that it would only be 47 dollars for a bath, nail clipping, and shave... To me that is cheaper than what the vet would charge.

Then her excuse is "Well she doesn't like other dogs or people so I am not walking her through petsmart" to which I replied... "They will have you bring her in an hour before they open, there will be no people or animals there..." and then I get ignored.

Again I have the feeling "It's not my animal, I am not dumping money into an animal that is not mine, or into an animal that will just continue to get mistreated..."

Like when Cody and I gave her a bath and combed out all of her fur (She is a long haired dog), everyone was like "You better muzzle her or she will bite you!"

You want to know what happened? She was so happy to be getting clean she practically jumped into the tub and stood there while I washed her THREE times because her coat was SO greasy and nasty, and nobody even said thank you...

I am not trying to sound like a brat or that I was just doing it to earn brownie points... I was just trying to make a point...That it's NOT an evil dog, she doesn't bite, has never bitten anyone...She will growl and snap her teeth at you if you try and mess with her feet, that is all. And frankly, if my nails were growing into the palms of my hands, I would probably bite someone who tried to mess with them too.


I am at the point where I really can't take it anymore, but I am not sure what else I can do to help the situation out. I don't think that Animal Control would even do anything since the bunny appears to be in good health, and the dog is a good weight and doesn't visibly look "neglected". Plus, living here has made me feel like just as much of a contributer to their abuse and neglect...



Am I wrong for feeling that I shouldn't have to take care of these animals?

What else can I do to try to get them to take better care or rehome them?
I am not in a stable enough position to cause a war...What I mean is, I can't afford to get kicked out right now...but you can bet that the day I leave I'll probably raise hell trying to take the dog and rabbit if they are both still here...


God I am really sorry for making such a long post... I'm so upset about all of this that I am crying my eyes out right now. I don't like to see animals suffer any more than any of you guys do, and I feel so helpless here because there is really nothing I can do short of causing a rift between us...

I love my grandparents so much...they really are too old to have to deal with so many animals that they don't want. I love my Aunt Amy, but she is so LAZY... I've lost count of how many guinea pigs she's starved to death and murdered, and even laying in my room and hearing her two pigs cry at night breaks my heart... It's easier to not have to see them suffering, but I know that they are...


Just...please I hope/pray that nobody thinks that I am a bad person for not putting all of them before my financial needs, I already feel selfish... I don't want to be a bad person, but what else can I do?



I forgot to mention that my aunt has a begal that she absolutely spoils rotten, this thing is at least 10 pounds overweight and has run of the house while sleeping with her every night, is groomed on a regular basis as well has having her nails clipped once a month...

Can you imagine the horrible feelings Penny must have, watching Crackers get everything while she lives her life chained up?

Oh boy that is such a tough situation..I am so sorry you have to deal with this
I feel your pain though..My boyfriend's family is the exact same when it comes to how they care for their animals. He doesn't live there anymore but when he used to live there and I went to visit I just felt sorry for the animals and wished there was something I could do..
If you really want to make the animals' life a little easier you could give the dog baths and take her for walks, I am sure she will appreciate it even if your aunt doesn't care. Does the bunny have a litter box? Maybe you could talk to the kids about helping them to clean the cage and clean it together with them, that way at least they will learn something about caring for animals from you.

No he doesn't have a litter box but it has a fall thru bottom in the cage and I talked them into putting litter under there instead of wood chips.

As far as the kids helping me clean it... Not in a million years... They take no responsibility for anything, and they are the two most spoiled kids you will ever see in your entire life. Wonderful traits that they learned from their mother...


Penny is such a puller that I'm afraid to walk her with the collar she has on and I couldn't convince cody to spend any money on a head collar or even a harness... She would probably be so excited she would choke herself to death.

I will continue to bathe her and brush her for the duration that I live here though, as well as giving her as much attention as I can when I suck up enough to be upstairs with everyone for more than 5 minutes.

Oh how sad!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I do understand your point and your frustration. But given you can't change your sister or her kids, I think it'll be a lot easier for you if you just give up trying educate anyone about responsibility. Maybe the kids will learn something about giving and caring if you just do what's right for the animals regardless of who should be caring for them.

I'm sorry but reading this has made me incredibly upset, please call animal control or something, if I lived closer I would help in an instant, this is so unfair and I am not blaming you hunni. x

You're in a horrible situation, and I can certainly understand why it's just not fair that you're the only one who seems to care and is physically capable of doing something.

But, maybe it's just meant for you to do right by these animals no matter what the other members of your family do or don't do - as was mentioned, maybe just seeing you do something selfless will positively influence at least the children. And if not, well, God, karma, the angels, the universe - they'll all know that you put the welfare of these poor creatures ahead of all the irritations you're rightfully feeling.

Will the other members of your family actually stop you from caring for the animals, at least as long as you're in the house? Is there any chance that if you take over the physical care, they'll at least contribute toward the financial side?

Originally Posted by Ruthyb

I'm sorry but reading this has made me incredibly upset, please call animal control or something, if I lived closer I would help in an instant, this is so unfair and I am not blaming you hunni. x

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If the leash is three times as long as Penny, then what they're doing isn't against the law. http://www.straypetadvocacy.org/html....html#Michigan

Originally Posted by LDG

If the leash is three times as long as Penny, then what they're doing isn't against the law. http://www.straypetadvocacy.org/html....html#Michigan

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Why quote me? I am referring to the whole situation, the bunny, the guniea pigs, everything, I have 8 bunnies and I could not bear to leave them more than 3 days without being thoroughly cleaned out, I know how dirty thy get in that time. The dog needs a walk and if its claws are unerlapping its paws this is awful. I know that Nekomania is really trying and none of this is her fault but something needs to be done, I just wish I lived closer hun, I would take the bunny atleast. xx

LDG

Thank you for that information, the leash is just a standard dog leash...I will have to try to get a picture, I know it's not three times her length, I could guarantee that because she can't circle the coffee table more than halfway...

Also, the situation is strange, it is not my sister it is my Aunt, and the kids are daughters of my other aunt.



darlili

I would hope that they would continue to contribute financially, they purchase the dogs food and she is kept up to date on her shots. They have not always done wrong by her, they spent almost 1000$ to rid her of the heartworms eating away at her. But that doesn't even do justice in my eyes enough to keep her chained up all the time. As far as getting her groomed and clipped, I don't think that is an expense they would be willing to part with, as sad as it sounds...

As for the bunny... They do provide it food and cage cleaning supplies plus it has a really nice cage (if a bit small), it's just a matter of getting Amy to actually DO it. I'm afraid the fact that I (and Cody) have been taking care of it has caused her to be even more relaxed in her responsibilities. But I just couldn't watch it starve anymore.




I would clip Penny's nails if I could but unfortunately she IS a struggler and may attempt to nip at me should I mess with them, plus they are all black claws and I don't feel comfortable with that and it would break my heart to hurt her. But as far as everything else, I really have no problem bathing her and combing her hair, but she is absolutely terrified of clippers (the noise) and wont let me touch her with a pair of scissors to at least get the hair dragging on the ground.

When we first moved here the rabbit's claws were at least 2 inches long, but all white nails so I had Cody hold him while I clipped all of those down. That was just the beginning of my anger towards everyone here.


It's just... They have such hate for the people who abuse their animals on that one show Animal Cops, but they can't see past themselves to notice the abuse or neglect right under their noses...


I'm afraid to call animal control but believe me that I want to...I don't know if they would suspect that it was me and like I said..as selfish as it sounds I really can't afford to be kicked out and to start a war.

Originally Posted by Ruthyb

Why quote me? I am referring to the whole situation, the bunny, the guniea pigs, everything, I have 8 bunnies and I could not bear to leave them more than 3 days without being thoroughly cleaned out, I know how dirty thy get in that time. The dog needs a walk and if its claws are unerlapping its paws this is awful. I know that Nekomania is really trying and none of this is her fault but something needs to be done, I just wish I lived closer hun, I would take the bunny atleast. xx

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I'm so sorry, I certainly didn't mean to offend you by quoting you! I don't understand the problem or the question. I was merely pointing out that the definition of what is legal exists, and often it's not what any of us would hope for - even if Nekomania wanted or was in a position to call animal control.

And I totally agree - none of this is her fault.

But if I were in that situation, I'd just get the harness so I could walk the dog, and I'd get a long lead for Penny, and I'd just schedule the appointment and take Penny in to get her claws clipped so she's not in pain, and I'd do something about the smell in the cage. I'd hand off the bills (including one for my time) without expecting reimbursement.

It's a horrible, frustrating situation - and I totally understand not being able to get in a war over it. But personally, I wouldn't be able to stand by and not do anything because technically it's someone else's responsibility.



for you and the animals in such a difficult situation!

Rabbits will die if their stomachs are EVER all the way empty. They can't handle it at all---they need very strong stomach enzymes to be able to digest their roughage, and the enzymes die if their stomachs go empty. So when they begin to eat again, they can't digest it and they die. So I can't believe he went a whole week without eating and is still kicking. Was there some hay in the cage, or wood or something?

Anyway, if they don't feed the rabbit at least once a day that's reportable neglect. If animals have starved to death in their care that's prosecutable cruelty. Tethering the dog is not illegal, but if her claws are too long or her fur is matted that can be considered neglect.

it may not be your job to care for them but somebody needs to do something. if nobody ever took care of something that wasn't technically "their problem", then nobody would do TNR, nobody would take foster kids, etc. If you can't call the authorities now, then simply care for the animals the best you can while you live there, and call Animal Control after you move out.

Originally Posted by Willowy

it may not be your job to care for them but somebody needs to do something. if nobody ever took care of something that wasn't technically "their problem", then nobody would do TNR, nobody would take foster kids, etc. If you can't call the authorities now, then simply care for the animals the best you can while you live there, and call Animal Control after you move out.

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I have to agree with this. I fully agree with you that a grown adult "should" take care of their animals and take responsibility for them. However, it is apparent in this case it is not going to happen. The bunny and dog did not ask to be put in this situation and you appear to be in a place where you can make their lives better.

Keep doing what you can for the poor dog and for the bunny just clean its cage, feed and water it. I know it will be a hard pill to swallow that you have to do this for a grown woman, but in the end the animals will be happier.

As for when you move out finally... if it was me, the rabbit would be packed up and heading home with me. I would say even the dog if your new living arrangements allowed it. And if anyone says anything just tell them it's the only way you can continue to care for them since no one else gave a damn

Originally Posted by Willowy

Rabbits will die if their stomachs are EVER all the way empty. They can't handle it at all---they need very strong stomach enzymes to be able to digest their roughage, and the enzymes die if their stomachs go empty. So when they begin to eat again, they can't digest it and they die. So I can't believe he went a whole week without eating and is still kicking. Was there some hay in the cage, or wood or something?

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The whole cage is made of wood and he chews on the wooden opening to his "nest" so perhaps he got nutrients from that?

He must have been doing something because the box of food that I feed him from was completely empty for the better part of a week.

I don't know much about rabbits at all...

These animals need to be cared for and since you are the only one who cares, just do it. The kids will see you and learn what proper care of the animals are. These animals need and deserve to be cared for and if no one else will, you just do it.

Hummmm... I agree with everybody who says just do it...
I see that your presence in there is these animal's chance in life, and I don't understand when you say that you can't do anything, and you can only cry, and so on...
IMHO you can do everything for these animals, you can easily save them. You are there, they are there... You can feed them, clean them, walk them, give them water, even educate the kids by actions...
IMO you got a wonderful opportunity at hand... You got a gift, and it might prove to be one of the most fulfilling things you will do in a while - save a couple of animals' lives, and who knows how many more, by educating the kids! Didn't you want a Bunny? So, it's yours! Do you need a piece of paper to make it so? To make it official? Nobody cares enough to feed him for a week? Guess what? It's yours. No need to tell anybody - just do the right thing. When the time comes, if the kids are ready to take good care of him, you will be comfortable leaving him... If not, just take him. That's it. You want to make that easy? take pictures of him now, and of his cage too, so if push comes to shove you can show the authorities.
Anyways, in the end, I don't quite understand when you say you can't do anything about it... What can't you do?
I know it can be frustrating, but it is time to pick your battles. Forget about things you can't change, and just take care of them - that you CAN do, and that is really, the bottom line in this story...

One thing I do not fault AA for, the serenity prayer, part of it anyway
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference
You can change the lives of the animals!
You know you can!!!
You have been given a gift, a gift to save lives

Thank you guys sooo much for all of your replies.

I guess when I say or seem like I can't do anything, I mostly am thinking about when the time comes for me to leave...

I can't exactly force anyone to spend any money on them, and I myself am unemployed, but as long as they continue to provide food and shelter I will continue to bathe, brush, feed, and water as well as keep them as much company as possible.

Trillcat, I don't really view that as a prayer as much as I view it as an inspirational quote. Thank you so much for putting that here, I need to attempt to live by it more often.

Originally Posted by LDG

I'm so sorry, I certainly didn't mean to offend you by quoting you! I don't understand the problem or the question.

I was merely pointing out that the definition of what is legal exists, and often it's not what any of us would hope for - even if Nekomania wanted or was in a position to call animal control.

And I totally agree - none of this is her fault.

But if I were in that situation, I'd just get the harness so I could walk the dog, and I'd get a long lead for Penny, and I'd just schedule the appointment and take Penny in to get her claws clipped so she's not in pain, and I'd do something about the smell in the cage. I'd hand off the bills (including one for my time) without expecting reimbursement.

It's a horrible, frustrating situation - and I totally understand not being able to get in a war over it. But personally, I wouldn't be able to stand by and not do anything because technically it's someone else's responsibility.

for you and the animals in such a difficult situation!

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I'm sorry LDG, the whole situation has touched a raw nerve with me, I am going to stop reading it as it has really upset me, totally agree with what you say. x