Questioning the fate of our youngest cat

Here is the history of our situation: Our youngest cat, Mouse, is 9 years old and, until recently, was the youngest of 5 cats. Soon after we got Mouse as a kitten, we acquired a dog whom we have never been able to cure of chasing cats who run from her, which includes Mouse. To her credit, she doesn't hurt them, just corners them, but Mouse has always been afraid of her. Therefore, Mouse lives in one end of our house which consists of the bedroom and the bathroom; she only ventures out to eat or for her litterbox and then she is always on the lookout. I believe she loves us and is bonded to us. We lost 2 cats last summer, but still have 3 cats and 3 dogs and undoubtedly the dogs suck up most of our attention, as dogs are prone to do.

Last month, our daughter moved out and announced that she wanted to take Mouse with her. She lives in a large, old house with several roommates and 3 cats. These are all cat people and no dogs are allowed, as it would scare the cats. After moving out, she hadn't said anything more about Mouse and we assumed she had changed her mind or forgotten the idea and we were prepared to just let that happen. Last night, she informed me that she had bought Mouse a collar, her own litter box, so on and so forth and would be taking her soon. My husband admitted to me that he really doesn't want her to take Mouse. I am in a quandry. Our daughter would be disappointed if we refused, but she would get over it, and Mouse's welfare is my main concern. My feelings are that it would be worth a try, that Mouse might possibly be very happy there, and she could always come back if she wasn't settling in. Can I please get any opinions out there about whether we should let Mouse give this a try or not? Maybe she is too old to adjust, I don't know. Could the move traumatize her too much?

Originally Posted by Bridget

Here Can I please get any opinions out there about whether we should let Mouse give this a try or not? Maybe she is too old to adjust, I don't know. Could the move traumatize her too much?

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I don't know if this helps or not but I took an 8 year old cat, Kasey, out of the only home she had known her whole life in May 2008. Kasey is in the "My Cats" pictures at the header of my post, which has her arrival and biography stories.

It is a different situation in some ways but has a few similarities.

- taking an older cat from a long time home
- bringing the cat to a home where other, "new" cats are well established
- there were a very few people at the location she bonded with, although in this case, others were not
- I expect Kasey was always fearful at her old home, or at least never knew what woul happen next

She did not like the 3 hour trip here in a cat carrier, it is tough when you're a cat to leave any home in the unacustomed confines of a cage.

We did the gradual introductions, in the manner often written up on this forum.

Kasey adapted well and acts very relaxed and content here, now.

Are you confident that your daughter will take proper care of Mouse, with the initial transition (keep her in one room to start) give her plenty of attention, keep her inside, take her to the vet, etc?

If you think your daughter will take good care of her and as the other poster mentioned do proper intros with the other cats, I would absolutely let her take Mouse! She can always come back if she doesn't get along with the other cats.

9 isn't very old, I adopted Rocko when he was 9 and he blended in splendidly. I think it just depends on the individual cat. Worth a try i think! I think the chance for her to not have to look out for dogs would be liberating for her and perhaps show a side to her that she hasn't been able to show. She may become like a kitten again! Playful and chipper.

Could be a new lease on life for Mouser!

Yes, a new lease on life, that's what I thought too! Thanks also, for the example of Kasey, as that is comforting that she did settle in. I do believe my daughter will take good care of her. Rose and Mouse bonded from the time Mouse was new. I also think it may be good for her to have other cats to play with. She hasn't played in a long, long time because of the dog and also because our other two cats are old.

I hadn't really considered my husband's feelings until now. He doesn't show a whole lot of emotion towards the cats, so I guess I assumed he didn't have any! I did tell him this morning that if he wants to keep Mouse, to just take a stand and say so. However, probably he won't and I think I will give this a try.

I figure I will try to go along when Rose takes her, as it may make Mouse feel more secure. Is this a good idea? After that, I won't visit for a couple of weeks because it might confuse Mouse and make her think she's coming home with me. However, I will be checking things out first-hand, to make sure it is working out for Mouse.

Originally Posted by Bridget

I figure I will try to go along when Rose takes her, as it may make Mouse feel more secure. Is this a good idea? After that, I won't visit for a couple of weeks because it might confuse Mouse and make her think she's coming home with me. However, I will be checking things out first-hand, to make sure it is working out for Mouse.

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I think this would be a good idea. In addition give your daughter some things from your house that have that "home" smell so that Mouse will have familiar scents to make her less fearful of the new environment. Maybe an unwashed blanket that she likes or a rug that she is particular of. Also maybe have your daughter try out the Feliway diffusers. They really helped my cats when we moved into our new house.

Great ideas. Thanks!

Be sure to keeps updated on how things are going for Mouse!

My parents wouldn't let me take my cats when I first moved out either. Looking back now, I don't really blame them. It took a couple of years before I was stable. I didn't know how to budget my money and I kept getting kicked out of places for not paying the rent. So I moved alot. I lived 5 different places before the apartment I have now. It would have been very hard on a cat, so in a way I'm glad they refused to let me take them right away. They still have Roxy but have given Kipper to me and I must say he is doing better here then he was there, even when I lived there with him. My little brother is a terror. Kipper is much more relaxed and doesn't hide anymore because he isn't in constant fear for his life.

So I say, give the cat to your daughter IF you are sure she won't end up making the mistakes I did. If you trust that her housing and income are stable and she won't be moving anytime soon then go for it. I can't imagine the constant stress she has now from the dogs is very healthy, so it might actually be better for her in the long run.